xmas crackers

minky67
minky67 Member Posts: 2,328
edited 25. Nov 2009, 20:15 in Community Chit-chat archive
saw these in my paper this morning,sorry if any1 read them.

Q...Son-''Mum can i have a dog for xmas'' :?:
A..Mum..''No you can have turkey the same as everyone else.''

Q..What does a tranvestite do for xmas :?:
A..Eat,drink & be Mary

Q..what does a mother-in-law call her broom stick :?:
A..Basic transport

Q..what do angry mice send each other at xmas :?:
A..Cross mouse cards

Q..What athlete is warmest in the winter :?:
A..A long jumper

Q..Where can you find literature about santa's helpers :?:
A..the elf-help section.
As i said sorry if youve read them.
luv debs

Comments

  • trisher
    trisher Member Posts: 9,263
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Debs

    Ha ha, nice ones Debs got any more

    Trish xxxx
  • minky67
    minky67 Member Posts: 2,328
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi trish,yes just raided the papers.
    Silly Quiz show answers.
    Q..What was Hilters first name.
    A..Heil.

    Q... Johnny Wiessmuller died on this day. Which jungle swinging character did he play.
    A..Jesus.

    Q..the point on a golf club or racket is known as what spot.
    A..The G-spot.

    Q..On what part of the body is a lobotomy performed.
    A ..The bottom.

    Q..Which ancienty army was discovered in China in 1974
    A..The Territorial .

    Q..Who was the primeminister before Tony Blair.
    A..ERRR George Bush.

    Q..What man made structure built during the 3rd century BC is often said to be seen from space.

    A..The Millennium Dome..
  • trisher
    trisher Member Posts: 9,263
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Debs

    Well pick some of the good ones and at Christmas you can tell a few

    What papers? the Sun?

    Trish xx
  • minky67
    minky67 Member Posts: 2,328
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hu Trisher,
    no daily m..l, i do the cryptic crosswords.
    Keeps the old grey matter working.
    some thing has to function properly. :wink:
    Wish i'd have keep the kids answers at school now.
    It may have been recycled now,i'll have a look as it was so funny.
    luv debs
  • trisher
    trisher Member Posts: 9,263
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    minky67 wrote:
    Hu Trisher,
    no daily m..l, i do the cryptic crosswords.
    Keeps the old grey matter working.
    some thing has to function properly. :wink:
    Wish i'd have keep the kids answers at school now.
    It may have been recycled now,i'll have a look as it was so funny.
    luv debs

    Debs

    See if you can find any. Might be some funny ones. You could look and if they were funny you could put them in the Christmas Crackers if they have a not so funny one.

    Trish xxx
  • chris7
    chris7 Bots Posts: 2,696
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Debs

    Am loving the silly quiz answers :lol: jesus swinging through the jungle :shock:

    Hope you got some sleep last night, we wos up late eh! take care
    Chris :wink:
  • minky67
    minky67 Member Posts: 2,328
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Chris, I had to be up for 10 as the housing officer was due.He didnt turn up til 2.30 :roll: But he went away with a flea in his ear over repairs to the house..
    He asked me what was wrong with my hand.(Wearing my splint) he didnt even know what Arthritis was let alone Fibro. :roll:
    But i think i got some results.
    If i get any more funnies i'll post them
    (now gonna route around in the recycling bag) :wink:
    debs
  • chris7
    chris7 Bots Posts: 2,696
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Debs

    Though you will I hope be snuggled up by now. Glad you got somewhere with the repairs but he did turn up late. So annoying when you are waiting :x
    Yes it's sad that only the folks on here can try and understand some of our problems. It really made sense to me when someone mentioned the Spoon theory, so true eh? do pace yourself and ask for help around the house.
    Yes do post more sillies if you find them. Will catch you around I hope.
    take care
    Chris xx