Unbelievable pain my mother is suffering

puckpits
puckpits Member Posts: 4
edited 4. Aug 2010, 04:35 in Living with Arthritis archive
My mother has just gone to bed in tears, in the worse pain I have seen her in to date. She has severe osteoarthritis in both knees and both shoulders and she is complaining tonight of pain in her back. She also suffers with severe fluid retention in her legs. She has had every test under the sun and they cannot seem to find any relief for her. Unfortunately she cannot take anti-inflammatorys and morphine makes her very ill too. She is currently relying on 8 cocodomal a day and that only gives her very mild relief. I really don't know where we go from here or how she will ever get some relief. If anyone has any helpful thoughts I would be eternally grateful. :) [/b]

Comments

  • elnafinn
    elnafinn Member Posts: 7,412
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi puckpits

    I am so sorry to hear about your mum. It is so upsetting to see loved ones in terrible pain and not being able to do anything about it. It is such a shame that your mum cannot take anti inflams as they can benefit one greatly with OA. I take it your mum is on the strongest coco pills. I too found that they are not that great and make one feel tired along with the side effect of constipation as well. Does she find heat or ice of any benefit, placed on the offending joints? I always prefer heat which I find helps. Ice can reduce swelling. Elevation of the legs may help your mum too, both when sitting and also in bed. Bricks or similar can be placed on the floor to raise the foot end of the bed. One can use pillows at the end of the bed, but they tend to move around! I am sorry I cannot offer much help but I truly sympathise.

    Luv
    Elna x
    The happiest people don't have the best of everything. They just make the best of everything.

    If you can lay down at night knowing in your heart that you made someone's day just a little bit better, you know you had a good day.
  • dreamdaisy
    dreamdaisy Member Posts: 31,520
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Oh puckpits how distressing for you both. I know that there are various forms of pain relief, based on different opiates (for want of a better term) perhaps there is something else she could try. Would water tablets help ease the fluid retention? I don't know, I'm groping in the dark here, I really feel for you both. Hopefully my brain will start working a little later and I'll come up with an idea or two - I wouldn't bank on it tho. I am so sorry. Dreamdaisy
    Have you got the despatches? No, I always walk like this. Eddie Braben
  • skezier
    skezier Member Posts: 11,333
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Puckpits,

    Its s hard to see someone you care about in pain and I wish I knew the answer. I think Elna and DD have given you some good advice and I can't think of anything else except maybe she could be referred to the pain clinic? Its not fair to leave her on Co-co's only and a tablet review would maybe help?

    Is it 'just' her gp that's in charge of her pain? See I don't think they understand pain well enough hence thinking about the pain clinic. I wish I could think of something to help her in the short term but hope she has a better day. Nice to meet you and take care Cris x
  • chris7
    chris7 Bots Posts: 2,696
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Morning puckpits

    So sorry to see this, how distressing for you to see your mum in such continual pain. I can't add to the advise here but just wanted to acknowledge your post and hope it is a much better day for you both.
    take care
    Chris
  • dorcas
    dorcas Member Posts: 3,516
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hello puckpits

    I'm so sorry your mum is suffering so. :( and I know how hard it is on you to see her pain but feel unable to help. :roll:

    Your mum's pain relief obviously isn't working so I would think she needs to have a review of her meds asap. As DD said there are lots of different analgesics which might control the pain better and be tolerated if not morphine based.

    Even though your mum has had lots of tests for her OA I wonder if any surgical options have ever been discussed? sounds drastic...but replacement joints can be very effective in restoring mobility and reducing or removing pain. has your mum seen an orthopaedic consultant? do you think that would that be something your mum would consider?

    Does your mum know what is causing the severe fluid retention in her legs? if not then that requires investigating to find out the cause and so be able to get the medication to treat the underlying condition.

    I think your mum needs to see her doc as he is the key to getting the help needed or refer your mum for more specialist assessment.

    Please pass on my best wishes to your mum. We are here to support you and her.....so you are not alone with the worry. Let us know how you both are today.

    (((hugs)))

    Iris x
  • speedalong
    speedalong Member Posts: 3,315
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi

    I'm so sorry to hear about the pain and distress your Mum is in. She definitely needs more help with this - a review of meds by the GP is in order. The suggestions of a pain clinic referral is a very good one as is a referral to an ortho consultant to consider surgical options. Heat/Cold and lots of soaks in the baths.

    It is very hard to see a loved one suffering and feel powerless to help (when my S was newly suffering with uncontrolled epilepsy, IBS and constipation - it was awful.) Make if at all possible you get short breaks away for you. If you can get a neighbour/family member to pop in for a few hours, this will really help you to cope and in turn help you support your Mum better.

    Speedy
    I have had OA since mid twenties. It affects my hips and knees. I had a THR on the left aged 30 and now have a resurface-replacement on the right - done May 2010.
  • woodbon
    woodbon Member Posts: 4,969
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi, I'm sorry that you are having to see your Mum in so much pain. My Mother have arthritis in her spine and she couldn't walk outside.

    Everyone has given you good advice, I went to see our gP (we shared the same one), and discussed things with hime. This was 30 years ago and pain relief wasn't so sophisticated, but the hospital did all they could, gave her nerve blocks in her spine.

    When someone you love is in terrible pain its so hard to watch and all I can suggest is that when she feels a bit better, chat to her about other things and when the pain gets really bad just be their for her.

    Talk to your doctor about YOU and how YOU are feeling and coping. Take a break if you can, other members of the family might be able to help and ask about respite care for your Muim. A weekend or week 'off duty' can help both of you.
    Lots of love, keep in touch with this site and use the Helpline to talk things over and see if they have any suggestions. look after yourself lots of love and hugs Sue xxxx (((((()))))
  • ironic
    ironic Member Posts: 2,361
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi, hope your mum is a bit better today. It breaks your heart to see your mum cry.
    Your a good daughter and I hope that you can get some help very soon.

    Take care,

    Lv, Ix
  • barbara12
    barbara12 Member Posts: 21,280
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi
    I am so sorry you have to watch your mum in so much pain, I know what you are going through, has I nursed my mum for years and had to sit back, feeling so helpless.
    Your mums needs to see a pain clinic, her GP can refer her.
    Some days my pain meds dont work has well, but overall I am coping well with the pain, I take amitriptyline at night, this really dose help me to sleep, there are lots of meds out there, so please see your gp and get your mum refered to the pain clinic.
    I hope this helps a little bit
    Please let us know how you get on.
    Love
    Barbara x
    Love
    Barbara
  • dorcas
    dorcas Member Posts: 3,516
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hope your mum... and you ....have had a better day and that your mum's pain has eased off, even a little.

    please let us know how you both are.

    lone n (((hugs)))

    Iris xx
  • puckpits
    puckpits Member Posts: 4
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    :) An emormous "thank you" to all those lovely responses to my post of yesterday. Mum is a little better today as she reverted back to the 8 co-codomol. The doctor called in last Thursday and offered Ibuforen in liquid form for her to try but it had no effect, hence the bad day yesterday. She was referred to the rheumotology unit at our local hospital and spent two weeks in there but really not much help. She had a hip replacement about 5 years ago which was a total success. But following this op she developed lymphodema. She has had 18 months of swollen and open wounds on her legs which about 3 months ago finally healed and with compression bandaging saw the fluid disappear, but sadly in the last 6 weeks it has all returned. Doctor is calling again Monday.
  • barbara12
    barbara12 Member Posts: 21,280
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi
    Thank You for your update, I was so worried for you and your mum, hopefully the GP will be able to refer her to a pain clinic, and give her something till she gets the appointment.
    Hope everything goes well .
    Love
    Barbara xx
    Love
    Barbara
  • chris7
    chris7 Bots Posts: 2,696
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi puckpits

    Just having a peek in and glad to see things a little better today. Do hope the doc, can start to find some ways to get some decent pain relief for your mum when he sees her tomorrow.
    take care of yourself too.
    Chris x
  • lavenderlady
    lavenderlady Member Posts: 409
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    so glad to hear shes feeling better my mum suffers with it as well but as she tells everyone" no where near as bad as her daughter ME", so she feels its me who needs the help which in turn stops her thinking of her own pain she had a TKR a few years ago which was a great success, so shes a lot more mobile and able then me , I would also suggest Ammyatriptalin this was my first thing to try years ago and I still take 3 before bed, lack of sleep always makes your pain feel far worse next day, or snuggle up with a hot water bottle early evenings not in this weather obviousy, I brought a bag fuill of beans of some type that can be frozen or warmed in the microwave that also helps hope shes feeling better each day now on :D
  • dreamdaisy
    dreamdaisy Member Posts: 31,520
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    puckpits, I am so sorry to read that your mum is in trouble again. How frustrating and disappointing for you both. I wish her well - please let us know how she (and you) get on. Keep in touch. DD
    Have you got the despatches? No, I always walk like this. Eddie Braben
  • frogmorton
    frogmorton Member Posts: 29,336
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Puck

    Read this all the way thorugh in one go and am so sorry for your poor Mum :( Sorry I missed it but was away at the weekend.

    The others gave you such great advice.

    Please do keep coming on here and we will do our best to support you and her if we can.

    Love and hugs

    Toni xx