Am I in denial?

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nearlybionic
nearlybionic Member Posts: 1,899
edited 23. Feb 2012, 06:25 in Living with Arthritis archive
Hi
I am still using my crutches following a fall on the ice recently. I am still having pain and problems with my THR side and my other hip, my back and my knee which I injured with the fall. My GP has signed me off work for another week and given more coco`s.
I am panicking about work (please don`t ask me not to, as I can`t) . I am worried about the work piling up, and also I am dreading being treated as the `disabled` person again. I was off work for a year a couple of years ago, and again for 3 months when my hip dislocated. It has taken a long time to be treated as an equal again, although everyone is mindful of my limitations.
I have been trying to manage without the crutches in the house, but am paying for it. I need to be ok to go back to work next week. Do I just try to go back? Or do you think i should ask my GP about a fit note beofre I just go back?
I am off for bloods this morning about my hands too. I am worried about this also and think I am worried that the results from this will also affect my job.
Sorry I am rambling.....
NB

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  • dreamdaisy
    dreamdaisy Member Posts: 31,520
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    No, you're not in denial, you're a lady who is (probably) rightly worried about work and feeling the pressure of the health problems over the past few years building again. I won't say don't worry about work, as work is important to people on so many levels but, as I have watched my work life dwindle over the past few years, I have come to realise that I matter more than my job. The quality of my life matters more, the quality of my health matters more, my happiness and sanity matter more, the feeling that I still retain some degree of control over something in my life matters.

    If you are still in trouble with the joints then keep using the sticks - they help and that matters. What others' perceptions of you are is irrelevant and doesn't matter. You take the time you need to get as fit as you can before you go back - there is no point in returning until you are in that position because you will only add further stress to stressed joints and a stressed mind. I think you had a goodly spell back at work before you slipped (their negligence perhaps? Didn't de-ice their car park as perhaps they should?) so this is a whole new situation, surely. Take another week - it sounds as though you need it, but try to use that time in a positive way to regain your health, rather than fretting about the numpties in the office. I wish you well. DD
    Have you got the despatches? No, I always walk like this. Eddie Braben
  • nearlybionic
    nearlybionic Member Posts: 1,899
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Thanks DD
    I am worried about my health spiralling out of my control again, as it has so many times in the past few years. Feeling useful whether at work or at home is good for my metal health and self esteem. i am feeling a bit `useless` at home as my hubby and my fab children are doing everything for me. I don`t want to lose my `position` (I don`t mean job) at work too.
    The fall was on an icy work carpark, which hadn`t been gritted, but I could have fallen anywhere whilst it was icy I suppose. Work aren`t putting any pressure on me, hey, I do that all by myself!!
    I am still using the crutches, and I have sticks too if I feel I need to try that instead.
    You are right that other peoples perceptions of me don`t matter I know, but it is that old chestnut of people asking what I`ve done to be on crutches (no plaster cast visible so can`t be that bad!) and ` ooo aren`t you young for arthritis/THR!!!!` I need to toughen up again! I have had a break from answering these questions and hoped I was putting it behind me for a while again.
    Hope you are having an ok day xx
    NB
  • bubbadog
    bubbadog Member Posts: 5,544
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Hi I totally agree with what DD said ( She is like the Dali Larma of the forum! if you get what I mean!) I'm stupid when it comes to crutches! I hardly use them in the house and wonder why my legs give way or I injure myself round the house! And my OH will shake the crutches at me! So definatley use the crutches! If your worried about work take the rest of the week off, it will take a week for blood test to come back and go back and see the Dr for blood results and see if the G.P is happy to do a fit note to go back to work. If you get the o.k then fine. Worrying about hands suffering is understandable, my hands have only recently started to suffer and I can tell you typing for more than 15 mins hurts. So if you type alot at work you will need to have breaks when you hands start to hurt. I really hope you get something sorted with work. Keep us posted.
  • barbara12
    barbara12 Member Posts: 21,281
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Oh NB...I for one can understand your worrys, like DD say work is very important to you,
    Has for other people, we all get that, so again we do understand, please try to ignore them and concentrate on yourself, you do have a lovely family, and they will be even better adults for helping you.
    Dont forget we are always here to talk to , and I really do wish you well with everything xx
    Love
    Barbara
  • hileena111
    hileena111 Member Posts: 7,099
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Hi NB
    You are stressed.....no wonder with all the health problems you've had over the years.
    Please use anything that helps and never mind what others think or say.
    If it helps you do things more safely that you cant do without them.....then get that mindset back again that you used to have :wink:
    You are more important than what any silly person thinks.
    As for work.....All I can say is take as much time as you need.....dont push yourself to go back.,
    It took me a while to buy a 4 wheel walker.....they are only for old people :lol::lol::lol: {I'm 65 :oops: } dont feel it except when this useless body reminds me :D Now I think its invaluable. {for times I need it}
    Come back and chat to us.....we dont go anywhere asw you know :wink:

    Love
    Hileena
  • nearlybionic
    nearlybionic Member Posts: 1,899
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    HI and thankyou for your replies.
    Bubbadog I have had my bloods done now and will get the results next week. I will see how I feel in a couple of days, and if no better I will see the GP again.
    Barbara, Thankyou for your kind words x I am probably just having a particularly low day and that is why the comments are getting to me. I am very lucky to have such a caring family, but feel that my children shouldn`t have to help their mum with shoes and socks etc..
    Hileena, I will try to get my head in a better place! Just feeling sorry for myself I guess; ;lack of sleep and pain does this to me, and us all too probably. I have a walker/trolley to use in the house, but that makes me feel old before my time (43!!) .
    Thanks again and it is good to know there is always someone to talk to who understands
    NB
  • dreamdaisy
    dreamdaisy Member Posts: 31,520
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    I might change my initials to DL: Dalai Lama. :shock: Crikey bubba, I ain't that good or wise but thank you for the compliment!

    Now, NB my lovely, it's time to ease up on yourself. It may well be that the caring roles are somewhat reversed in your family but that does not mean it's wrong, inappropriate or something to feel ashamed by. It shows that you have around you those who love you, and show that love with practical care. That is a good thing. I went last week without knickers or socks as life was tough, but as I wear maxi skirts and boots no-one knew! :) As for questions, well I agree they can be tiring but it's best to answer politely but without detail. I suggest 'I have arthritis but I'm not too young for it as I am sure you know.' Job done. Now, as for the sticks in the house why not use them? We prove nothing by not using them, all we achieve is further infliction of pain and discomfort on ourselves, which is rather silly. Please keep in touch and let us know how you are feeling/getting on, yes? ((())) DD (who's in full DL mode!)
    Have you got the despatches? No, I always walk like this. Eddie Braben
  • bubbadog
    bubbadog Member Posts: 5,544
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    dreamdaisy wrote:
    I might change my initials to DL: Dalai Lama. :shock: Crikey bubba, I ain't that good or wise but thank you for the compliment!

    Now, NB my lovely, it's time to ease up on yourself. It may well be that the caring roles are somewhat reversed in your family but that does not mean it's wrong, inappropriate or something to feel ashamed by. It shows that you have around you those who love you, and show that love with practical care. That is a good thing. I went last week without knickers or socks as life was tough, but as I wear maxi skirts and boots no-one knew! :) As for questions, well I agree they can be tiring but it's best to answer politely but without detail. I suggest 'I have arthritis but I'm not too young for it as I am sure you know.' Job done. Now, as for the sticks in the house why not use them? We prove nothing by not using them, all we achieve is further infliction of pain and discomfort on ourselves, which is rather silly. Please keep in touch and let us know how you are feeling/getting on, yes? ((())) DD (who's in full DL mode!)

    DD You always write such helpful and uplifting replies to people including myself and what you write is trueful and informative. Your posts always come across as caring yet fun. That's why I think your the Dalai Lama of the site!! And yes maybe we should call you DL from now on! :wink:
  • dreamdaisy
    dreamdaisy Member Posts: 31,520
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    :oops: Thank you. I honestly don't know what to say. :oops: DD
    Have you got the despatches? No, I always walk like this. Eddie Braben
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