Newly diagnosed & a little bonkers

freesia
freesia Member Posts: 409
edited 29. Mar 2012, 13:51 in Say Hello Archive
Hi there everyone...

I have been looking at this forum over the last few days, and have been "SO" inspired with your various posts showing such kindness & understanding towards each other - I simply had to join in your family.. I hope you don't mind... I do come accross a little mad at times... :wink:

I have recently been diagnosed with Bi-lateral knee arthritis in my early 40's... and after being extremely active in younger years, I am now very slowly coming to terms (and 'trying' to stay positive) after being told I have severe arthritis in both knees...

I had arthroscopy surgery in December on both knees together, It was suppose to be keyhole but the damage to both knees was so extensive the surgery ended up being very much open surgery, unless they used HUGE KEYS... And I am still coming to terms with the diagnosis...

I have daily fluctuating feelings of anger / mixed emotions / sadness & happiness, painful days and not so painful days - sometimes I simply don't know what I feel... am I normal....???

The incredibly excrutiating pain (at the moment) has gone, but I am still incredibly stiff and in daily pain... but recently have been experiencing very loud cracking noises in my kness... what is going on...??

To be perfectly honest with you all, I am still in denial, and I don't want to accept that I have arthritis...... I am told I will need replacements but am really TOO YOUNG, but this does not ring true - I have grey hairs & wrinkles & now 2 lovely long scars... I just want to be painfree, is it too much to ask....

If and when they do replacements, will I have railway tracks (scars) on my knees....?? very attractive... I am a little off the wall today, in pain and on medication again... Well at least the sun is shining.... 8)

I look forward to chatting with you all xx
hugs freesia xxx

Comments

  • stickywicket
    stickywicket Member Posts: 27,697
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hello Freesia (My Mum’s favourite flowers) and welcome to the forum. If you’re merely ‘a little mad at times’ then I’m not sure this is the right place for you. Half of us are stark raving bonkers most of the time. (It helps.) :lol:

    It sounds as if yours is OA and, yes, it’s exercises, paindullers – many of us dislike the misnomer ‘painkillers’ – and then surgery. To be honest, the tramlines are the least of my worries. I regard them as battle scars (Just call me Spartacus) and they do fade though never quite disappear. I don’t know where those giant keys went in (I love it:lol:) but, as and when the time comes, they might be able to use the same tracks. ‘Too young for replacement joints’ is a constant refrain. It makes me feel a little guilty as I had my first 2 knee replacements aged 35 – but I had had RA for 20 years by then.

    You say you ‘have daily fluctuating feelings of anger / mixed emotions / sadness & happiness, painful days and not so painful days - sometimes I simply don't know what I feel... am I normal....???’ Oh yes! That sounds pretty bogstandard normal to me, freesia. Just make sure you enjoy the good days and, if the bad days are bad because of what you did the day before, don’t regret them.

    What meds are you on, by the way? They almost certainly won’t kill the pain entirely but, if it’s generally bad, there are almost certainly others you could try.

    I'll look forward to seeing you around.
    If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving definitely isn't for you.
    Steven Wright
  • dreamdaisy
    dreamdaisy Member Posts: 31,520
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hello Freesia, lovely flowers and a lovely name! I have OA in both knees and ankles (thanks to the other sort of arthritis I have) and I have to wait another two years before I get new knees. I will be 55 then, I began the first arthritis aged 37 then the OA was officially diagnosed last Easter. I'm still upset by it. The pain is strong, nothing touches it so I have to be content with having just the sharper edges dulled, thus I do understand how you are feeling. Luckily all my days are painful and I am pleased about that as it helps me realise just where I am with it all. The words paddle and creek spring to my mind. :roll:

    It takes a while to get used to the idea that one's life has altered in a way that one was never expecting nor really wants. There is a very good thread on the LWA forum called 'Acceptance' and I concur with the view that learning to cope with this is a process similar to grieving: that leaves one's emotions all over the place in a similar way to the pain, frustration and tiredness caused by arthritis. I am slowly emerging from a flare of my first sort and I am feeling extremely grumpy and grizzly about it all but I know that will pass as it always does.

    The forum is a good source of support, encouragement and information and I hope to see your lovely name popping up all over. Take care, I am pleased you have joined and I hope we can help. I wish you well. DD
    Have you got the despatches? No, I always walk like this. Eddie Braben
  • freesia
    freesia Member Posts: 409
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Well - I AM COMPLETELY BONKERS..... :lol:

    But I didn't want to admit it too early, in case I was banned or put people off teehee..... So I should fit in then.... haha :lol:

    Unfortunately I cannot take any kind of antimflammatories (that spelling looks weird) due to allergies so taking codine & paracetamol, I have all strengths from GP so can basicly self dose as I need... knowing what my limits are of course... lol... tried all sorts of different medication but at present this combo seems to work the best for me...

    Glad to hear my fluctucating "emotions" sound normal too - thinking everyone around me are ordering my arm hugging suit with shiny designer buckles and booking my holiday in a padded cell soon... :lol:

    I guess it's all still so new for me - so still shocked, finding it hard to accept just yet.... Phoned the helpline earlier before my first post, and they were SO lovely and very very helpful....

    The spring & summer will be smelling of "freesia" so hope you like the smell lol....

    Thank you for your hints & tips - I look forward to chatting again soon... x
    hugs freesia xxx
  • stickywicket
    stickywicket Member Posts: 27,697
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    freesia wrote:
    Glad to hear my fluctucating "emotions" sound normal too - thinking everyone around me are ordering my arm hugging suit with shiny designer buckles and booking my holiday in a padded cell soon... :lol:

    Hey, welcome to padded cell city. :lol: We're all here ahead of :wink: you.
    If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving definitely isn't for you.
    Steven Wright
  • frogmorton
    frogmorton Member Posts: 29,332
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Freesia

    lovely to meet you and to welcome you to our forums. they are very special and have really helped me no end.

    When this first kicked off with me l think l bawled all day every day for at least a week. I also went hyper-manic looking up stuff and getting (badly) informed :oops: Other times l was livid that this was happening to me and then also pretended it wasn't so yes - the topsy turvy emotions are soooo normal :wink:

    We can't 'cure' you, but we can support you and swap tips we have learned over the years, have a laugh and share a tear if needs be.

    I look forward to seeing you around on the forums.

    Love

    Toni xxx
  • freesia
    freesia Member Posts: 409
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi frogmorton...

    Thank you for your message...

    This forum is a 'blessing'..... Not happy to be here as such, with OA, but it's great to be in contact with people who know what your going through....

    Had a long chat with the "helpline" earlier in the week - they were amazing too... got lots of information in the post today...

    Diagnosis still so new, and coming to terms will take time... But this is a wonderful place to find help & friendship..

    Thanks again.. freesia x
    hugs freesia xxx
  • frogmorton
    frogmorton Member Posts: 29,332
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Freesia

    l too had a few chats to the helplines in the early days....in fact l bawled for AGES!! It's a wonder they hung on so long :oops:

    It is not easy at all to take it all in at once, my best advice is to keep talking. By talking l mean to those who know, not necessarily to our nearest and dearest (they are worried too), but to people like each other on here.

    I am so glad you have found us

    Love

    Toni xx
  • barbara12
    barbara12 Member Posts: 21,280
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi freesia
    Its lovely to meet you, bonkers does help...and having people to talk to that understand some of what you are going through is priceless.
    I hope we hear more from you very soon.x
    Love
    Barbara