Someone to talk too!

Hi Julie. I cannot begin to understand what you have been through in your life but you are an impressive survivor. I too have widespread OA and a few other issues which leave me in constant pain and, as a 62 year old bloke, I can burst into tears at the drop of a hat. I live alone so nobody gets to see it other than my cat who I chat to often, what an understanding little thing she is. If you feel in need to chat the Samaritans will be there for you, they are non-judgemental and will help, there is also the Versus Arthritis helpline as well. In addition there are all of us sufferers on here who can offer the benefit of their experiences. Apart from talking to one of the helplines I would also recommend seeing your GP, OA is a strange condition as in some people it remains in one area, in others it creeps up slowly and in others it hits one hard. Hang in there girl, I hope you find what you need.

Good to hear from you Julie. It sounds like you have a plan to get past this latest rough patch, and I can perhaps understand how being taken out of your usual busy-ness and human contact may have made things harder for you. I often think being stressed can make pain worse, as your body is so tensed up which is contracting all the muscles around the inflamed joints, and it takes on a spiral effect. If I have a sudden random massive twinge, I try to consciously relax and let it drift away. Pain is intended to tell us to stop doing something, but if you are already just sitting or lying down, acknowledge to yourself that you are not in danger, the pain is therefore not important, and try to ignore it. (But don’t suddenly run round the house to prove a point !😁) Relax, tell it you don’t need to worry about it, and It sometimes seems to help. Not always, just sometimes.

If your garden feels a bit overwhelming at the moment, just find a corner and sit in it. If the plants are too big, in the wrong place, dying back or full of “weeds”, just sit and marvel at what it is doing without humans fiddling with it. Study the “weeds” (aka wildflowers”), see what insects and birds are enjoying them, talk to the plants (yes, it does help!), ask them how they are, admire the few flowers they are giving you even if they are struggling too, struggling is part of existence, from the mountains formed by the violence of volcanicity or the death of millions of sea creatures compacted under oceans and the upthrust of tectonic movement, Nature’s food chain, from insects up to lions, shrimps to whales, plants battling for supremacy in gardens and woodland. And let’s not even get started on the Big Bang!

So If you can manage 10 mins work to help one plant, just do that. Sorry to sound so zen and hippy (I’m really not like that, I work in the construction industry), but doing what little I can in the garden, or just sitting there, has helped me through many rough patches. I worked very briefly in Sheffield many years ago and remember the hills (!), but I also remember the beautiful gardens, so you must be on good soil.

This Covid stuff will come to an end eventually and some degree of normality will return, and your support mechanism, and the NHS, will be back in place. If the pain really is unbearable meanwhile, I think I’d say don’t wait the full two weeks (unless you are trialling a new drug that takes. While to kick in) and get back to your doc sooner than that. Meanwhile try hot baths, heat pads, ice packs, aromatherapy, snuggly blankets, chocolate, bad movies, read a daft book, take up poetry, sing in the bath, have a gurning competition with your family, whatever will make you giggle, and just give yourself a big daily hug, and gradually you’ll weave your way through this.

Sending a hug. X