Orthopaedic referral

Hi @Whiskey26 , it's perfectly normal to be apprehensive about hospital procedures. You're not being a wuss. Prior to my THR the only surgery I'd had was tonsils out when I was six and a few stitches here and there. I'm only 4 years older than you. I have another very fit and active friend of your age who is having her new hip later this month. And while I haven't had children, but I'd far rather go through hip surgery than child birth!

I really do think it would be worth at least seeing the surgeon to review your options. He is a specialist in arthritic hips, your GP isn't, so he can discuss with you what can feasibly be achieved without surgery, and what to expect from your hip in the months/years to come. Surgeons aren't desperate to replace our joints for the sake of it. He will only offer it if other options have been exhausted, or if it's already beyond the point of no return. But if he does suggest surgery then it's well worth being put on the waiting list, since in 12-18 months when your turn comes (hopefully much sooner) , you may be more than ready for it by then. I suspect you could defer at that stage if you still felt so inclined. But tbh, from what you decribe, I'd say you're more than ready for it already. While the pain was horrendous and very limiting, I didn't have the same level of immobility that you describe.

I had the steroid injection, and I wouldn't honestly say it hurt. It was a pretty uncomfortable yes, but it was over very quickly. I was almost disappointed, all that build up for a sharp poke with a needle. Sadly I was one of those for whom it didn't work at all, but if it had done, then I would have been happy to keep having them until the damage to my hip was so bad it was time for surgery. Just lie there, look the other way and think happy thoughts. (I usually dig my nails into my palm if really worried, as the pain in my hand takes my mind off what the doc is doing! 😅)

But if and when the other options HAVE been exhausted, then surgery is probably your only and best course, as the OA will continue to deteriorate however much exercise we do and pills we pop (although they may slow it down a bit). The purpose of this surgery is to manage pain and restore mobility when all else fails. Do keep up with the exercise though, the better your muscles that support your hip, the faster you will recover from the op, plus it will help manage the pain now, and equally important, it will help your mental health - this is a tough time for you.

While my recovery has been disappointingly slow, I am in a minority in that regard, and I am immensely grateful for my new hip. The relentless 24/7 pain in the joint has gone (yaaaay!!), I need no pain relief at all, it's just that my muscles and tendons just need to get over themselves and start toeing the line, which is a bit hard work, but hey, I'm getting there.

Look at it this way - without surgery the pain and immobility is only going to get worse. After surgery, the only way is up. The docs do this day in day out, the nurses will look after you immediately in the post op, and if you've been battling along with the various aids for this long, there won't be many surprises for you in how to cope when you get home. The OTs will give you all the extra kit you need, the physios won't send you home till you're mobile, and your family will help out with the day to day stuff.

Do go along to see your surgeon at least, talk through your worries with him/her, and work out a solution between you. You have nothing to lose, and they won't force you into anything.

Hi @Whiskey26 If I'm honest there are some parts of the procedure that are rather fuzzy, which is probably normal. It's possible they did give me a small local anasethetic before the spinal block, but I can't remember. What I DO remember is that nothing hurt more than any normal injection or fitting a canula from beginning to end of the anaethesia and actual operation. The recovery was more painful, but the nurses were happy to give me as much pain relief as I needed to keep it bearable. As one of them said to me, a big part of your recovery is managing the pain, and if I felt I needed more pain relief, I should simply ask for it rather than wait for them to come round with the drugs trolley.

I don't know whether you've seen it already, but this is the blog I kept about my journey from the day before surgery to (almost) current day. I promise I'm not blowing my own trumpet, but you might find some bits of it useful and perhaps have a giggle. A well developed sense of humour certainly helps get through this sort of thing!

https://community.versusarthritis.org/discussion/54075/new-hip-day/p1

But please note, I am not a typical patient in terms of recovery, and had quite a lot more soft tissue pain, muscle reaction and a slower recovery than most. Basically the hip abductor muscles sort of switched off, and they're the ones that move your leg out sideways, and also help you stand up straight. A tendon in my groin, which helps raise your knee, also played up, and took a while to settle down. All this meant that without my stick/crutches, my torso lurched off to the left over my operated hip all the time. My surgeon is still not quite sure why all this happened, as they didn't do anything to these muscles (!), but he said on rare occasions it does happen. I was just one of them. He's not worried, I think he's just monitoring me more out of curiosity than concern. It's a bit frustrating for me, but it's getting much better. I'm just getting on with whatever my body will allow me to do, but the main thing is, No More Pain.

Where I am now? My op was April 17, I'm getting round the house and garden without a stick, and not needing any pain relief (after about 10 pills a day pre-op). I do my physio 2-3 times a day (only takes about 5 minutes). At the moment I tend to take my stick with me when going into town etc as my hip muscles get tired and achy quite quickly, but I did a short shopping trip without it for the first time today. It probably looks like I'm still limping a bit while my muscles get back to normal but it's loads better than it was and is visibly improving all the time. I can stay on my feet for 2-3 hours at a time, again without pain, and can walk about 2 miles with my stick. That's much more than I could pre-surgery, and I know it's going to keep improving.

Finally, You Are Not A Coward!! You have battled through your arthritis for years, you have endured pain, depression and fatigue, and kept your life going despite all that. That makes you A Warrior, not a "silly person". And you certainly shouldn't be ashamed. It's completely normal to be anxious about surgery. My way of dealing with it from the day I was told I needed a new hip was to go into a state of total denial about what someone was going to do to my leg. That's why I asked them to knock me out completely. Does that sound like someone brave to you? No. I'm no different to you. I did have a bit of a wobble when the anaesthetists got stuck in, but I thought "well it's too late now, they seem to know what they're doing" and I sort of mentally blocked out what was happening. Afterwards, I didn't even have the courage to look at the wound when the nurse took out the stitches. Every now and then I have a peak, but there is an emotional disconnect about it being part of my body. I just make sure it's healing ok in a rather detached way, as thought it's someone else's leg, and get on with life. That's not brave or cowardly, it's just a different coping mechanism. So don't think your anxiety is anything to be ashamed of. At least you're honest about yours, I just hid mine better.

Every time you look at yourself in the mirror, tell yourself "I'm an arthritis warrior. I'm still standing despite everything my hip has thrown at me. We can fix this." And believe it.