decision

bertyboy

well i have seen the consultant re my knees and although he is willing to put me on the list for replacements i am just not sure i am ready for that step it would be in the next 3 to 5 months time , so i have an appointment in early jan for xrays to see if any worse and see him then , my thoughts now though are that i feel i am not being believed on how painfull they are and that i am useing crutches for the hell of it , its no fun i can tell you i do my excercises to keep my muscles working what else do people need to know [friends relations ] vidio of me crawling up stairs at night in pain , strugling to walk the dogs ,

elnafinn

Do you mean it is your family and friends that do not believe how painful your knees are? Obviously the consultant does as he is willing to go forward with putting your name on the list for replacements. Perhaps if you mention to your friends that you are not ready for the op but have been offered it, they think you cannot be so bad then........ which makes sort of sense in a way.

Why not have your name down on the list anyway and if your name comes up to the top and you get a date you can always cancel and the slot goes to the next person. A better idea in my opinion than not being on the list at all. You have backup then in case things become unbearable for you and you feel ready for the operation.

Best wishes
Elna

ritnew

I know a hip replacement is totally different to a knee replacement but I just wanted to tell you how I feel just five weeks after my THR.
Although I'm far from being totally better, I can't believe the difference it's made to my life. Friends have commented at how well I look now, the strain of being in pain 24/7 showed on my face , this has now gone. I'm not totally painfree yet but I can cope with the little bit of pain I do get and the meds take away any I do have, which they never did before. Going from 15 to 18 meds a day to at the most 6 and some days just a couple. I am so looking forward to going back to our last year's holiday destination so I can make up for all I couldn't do last year as the pain was so bad.
At the end of the day it is up to you, but if you let your name go on the list at least you will have some time to think about it and if you decide to go for it you won't have another long wait.
I know how you feel when you say friends and family don't understand, I felt the same and as I've said many times finding this site was a godsend, I bet they'll notice like mine did when you do have it done how much happier you are.
Good luck, I'm sure you'll make the right decision for you.

Rita X

lindalegs

I agree wholeheartedly with Elna and Rita, Bertyboy.

I think I understand why you consider people think you're putting it on and that's because it's to do with something inside you that doesn't believe it's happening? In my early days of RA I wanted to shout to everyone this isn't the real me :shock: and even now after all these years I sometimes think people wonder if I'm putting it on and its purely because I don't want to be like this. Because, when you're using your crutches, you can't see you, you're imagining that people think you're okay really.

I had a shock recently when I saw a video of myself dancing - I never realised how stiff and awkward I look and that's because to my brain I'm normal, I just hurt a bit - sometimes I hurt alot :roll:

Other people see a different person to us because we're on the inside looking out and it sounds to me as though you, yourself feel a bit of a fraud. You're not, believe you me, your consultant would not have put you on a list if he didn't think you needed the op.

You have time to think about it yet - nothing's set in stone.

Luv Legs

woodbon

Hello, I agree with Linda, I had a shock when someone mentioned to me that my limp had got worse, I didn't know I had a limp until then, then I started worrying that people would think I was doing it on purpose! :shock: I know, inside that its silly to think like that but I can't help it. I wonder if that's how you feel?

I think the suggestion of putting your name down and then deciding when the time comes is a really good idea. The lists take a while to work through and by the time you have a date you may really be glad. If you don't and things get even worse, you will hate having to wait and the sooner you have it done the better the result, I would think. The surgeon must be sure that the time is right for you to have the op. they would'nt do it otherwise

I know its a big thing, and only you can decide, so I wish you good luck in making the choice. Love Sue

bertyboy

thanks folks the consultant is very good and i am sure that if i changed my mind between now and january it would not be a problem ,and i could go on the list , its a lot to think about as it has only been a year of actually knowing i have this problem , and yes it has got bad so quick , i need to be focust in my head that its the right time x

elnafinn

'Don't look a gift horse in the mouth' bertyboy There are many people on this forum that would give anything :oops: for a consultant to suggest putting their name down on a waiting list for an op now rather than the very usual response of "you are too young - call back in 10 years time to review the situation.

You are very lucky to have the choice. If I had to use crutches to get around I would, without a shadow of a doubt, have got my name down on that wonderful list. Using crutches puts a lot of pressure on other joints that can possibly become more prone to becoming athritic.

Elna x

tkachev

When my knees were bad(they are better nowadays) I used to sit down alot to take the weight and pain off them. Then I would be asked by relatives if I could do the washing up or something because I wasnt doing anything!!!!!

Take care Tkachev.

bertyboy

it is not the operation that is my concern but the after affects and my worries of having another anaphylactic shock issue due to anti sickness drug while in hospital after a major operation i doubt it would happen again but it was a very frightening issue ,i certainly do not feel that i am taking another's place or jumping ques as i am not on a list, he has said i can leave it or have it done its my choice my body my thought what i can say is i have a very good consultant , that wants me to be sure x

joanlawson

Hi Bertyboy

I understand very well how difficult it is to make the decision, as I am in the same situation. I was told last Dec. that I could be on the list for a TKR, but I opted to have more time to consider it.

However, in my case, an arthroscopy has reduced my pain to a certain extent, and at present I still don't want to put myself through major surgery unless I've really got to.

There are things I can no longer do, like going on long walks in the countryside, but otherwise I can manage reasonably well. If I had to use crutches like you, I might feel differently.

When you have had an unpleasant experience previously when in hospital, as you have had, it does put you off somewhat. But I think you have to balance the risks with the benefits for your quality of life. If the arthritis is robbing you of a normal life, I think surgery is probably the solution.

Joan

luckybug

Always ask for a second opinion, I was told I needed knee replacements, but decided to ask my rheumatologist if I could see a doctor regarding an arthroscopy as I didn't feel I was ready for replacements. I had an arthroscopy and my knees improved, the doc told me that a replacement was not needed, and my joints are just highly inflamed, so he asked the rheumy to put me on stronger pills, hence why I am on humira anti tnf. Good Luck, never listen to the first doctor always ask for a second opinion. **** them if they think you are going over their heads, it's your body, you have to live with what they do, they don't.