hiding pain

jordan7j

Hi everyone Does anyone who works try to hide pain from colleagues/bosses etc., I am working with young children and trying to pretend everything is ok, getting down on the floor even though its agony, just so they dont know. I worry that they will say they dont want me to care for their kids anymore and as well as losing my job and pay, I enjoy being with the little ones. My physio says to cut down, but its esier said than done, you feel you are letting people down. It isn't a job where you can take breaks, I am on my own with two little ones, so no lumch break etc.,By the end of the day I am exhausted, I work 8 - 6. Need some advice, do i need to give up work now? Or find a way to cut down, and hope I can cope then. Please advise!!!

elnafinn

Hi Jordan

I can well understand your predicament. It is not always the money but the enjoyment from the job too. If every day you are so exhausted that you have no life at all other than work and sleep then perhaps it is time to have a word with your employers. That is a very long day that you do without proper breaks and probably against the law. I am sure they are aware that you love working with the children and would wish to keep you on and may well be amenable for you to cut your hours a little or allow you to sit on a lower chair rather than on the floor all the time. If you do not ask, you will not know, will you? I would have thought they have seen you struggling on occasion and if you approach them, you may be surprised how kind they are to you and do their best to make things easier for you.

Luv
Elna

smillajasperson

Hi Jordan.
I do appreciate your problem as I was myself in a similar situation. I worked as an assistant manager in a charity shop which I absolutely loved but the work was very hard. Only the manager and I were under 70 so we couldn't expect volunteers of that age (and a lot older!) to do all the necessary lifting and carrying involved - although they were very willing! Like you it was impossible to take breaks and having OA in the lower back and knees (and my boss wasn't in a much better state!) it was very hard going and I was often in agony. After 2 1/2 years my back packed up completely and I had to have 4 months off work. After that I decided there really was no choice but to leave - my back would never be reliable and I felt guilty at the thought of my boss having to do even more herself - she needed someone younger and fitter.
All I am saying is if you can find a way to cut down your hours and pace yourself maybe you can stay in the job you love and not be forced to leave by your health collapsing altogether. I don't know if money is an issue for you (it certainly is a concern for me!) but your health is so precious and if your job is causing you a lot of pain you have to ask yourself if it is all worth it or whether some changes either in your hours or duties will make enough of a difference to enable you to stay on. I understand your reluctance to tell your boss/ the other workers about your health but there is no chance of any change/improvement to your working conditions unless you do tell them and you may find they are more supportive than you fear! Good luck!
Love Smillajasperson

ninakang

Hi Jordan

I don't have anything else to add to the above two posts except to reread them and take the advice! If you carry on working like this, there's a chance you'll have to give up work altogether.

Take care of yourself.

Nx

jordan7j

pixyandfaries wrote:

ditto above now wot was i thinking about taking good advise! ???

Hi , thank you for your advice it is greatly appreciated. I will speak to the parents of the children, I am esentially my own boss, as I child mind, so it is the parents who i need to approach. During the summer it will be easier anyway, as one child's mum is a teacher, and the other one only 2 days per week. Will talk to them about RA and what this means. Hopefully i can sort this out, i really dont want to give up work just yet Thanks everyone,much appreciated, this forum is just fantastic!!!

ritwren

In many ways it's even worse for you that you work for yourself. I find I am my own worst enemy and push myself to the limit most of the time. It sounds to me like you do as well. If you had a boss they could maybe help you see ways you could manage the situation better. I'm glad it's holiday time for the little ones and you will be able to get a bit of a break. Do try to put yourself first once in a while. You know how fragile your health is. Very very best of luck whatever you do.
take good care.

valval

jordan7j wrote:

Hi everyone Does anyone who works try to hide pain from colleagues/bosses etc., I am working with young children and trying to pretend everything is ok, getting down on the floor even though its agony, just so they dont know. I worry that they will say they dont want me to care for their kids anymore and as well as losing my job and pay, I enjoy being with the little ones. My physio says to cut down, but its esier said than done, you feel you are letting people down. It isn't a job where you can take breaks, I am on my own with two little ones, so no lumch break etc.,By the end of the day I am exhausted, I work 8 - 6. Need some advice, do i need to give up work now? Or find a way to cut down, and hope I can cope then. Please advise!!!

hi work in shop and yes dont let any one see how bad things really r people just dont understand and no one wants to hear u moaning all the time :oops: so keep it to my self .first day back after a week off and was in so much pain only do 4 hours fell asleep when got in as had been so difficult up all night in pain so not in best of moods lol

elnafinn

Now it becomes clearer to me. As a childminder, the parents will not see or be aware of how you are sometimes, suffering in the day and finding difficulty as a result in looking after their children and you will not really get any breaks either. At least you have some respite now. It would be difficult to cut your hours, I agree, with these children that you are caring for now but perhaps when you get a new intake you could find children where the parents working day is not perhaps so long so you could work a few hours less a week.

I do hope something can be worked out as I can well understand you wish to continue childminding.

Make the most of the break!

Luv
Elna x