No faith in the system

shelleymogui
shelleymogui Member Posts: 88
edited 18. Aug 2009, 12:49 in Living with Arthritis archive
In fact there is no bl**dy system to getting Benefits. My father has been paying NI and taxes and everything all his life. He left to go to Spain, asked if he needed to pay NI 'No sir you have paid the maximum you can, no top ups required here' Dad didnt realise that was for pension and not in general and now benefits may prove difficult. We accepted this was our fault for not checking where else your NI goes.....so

After countless times telling countless people his situation, saying he has no income, im paying for meds for which when he came out of hospital cost £60 for his first 3 prescriptions (alot of meds for gout, painkillers, blood pressure, protection of stomach and ibuprofen for swelling of knee), he still has had no help from the 'system'. He'll have a good day, filling out a form for ESA and then by the time he has filled the form out and got his sick notes together, he has a letter saying not eligible. It is making his days of ups and downs with his arthritis go up and down because of this too. He feels he is going pillar to post and back again.

All we need is someone to give us help for 5 mintues to assess his situation and tell us what we are eligible for! not just some idiot who couldnt care less on the end of a phone asking for birthday and NI number. Jobcentre is next port of call.

Grrrrr.

How do they know I am taking good care of him and can support him, a 26 year old can't necessarily take care of someone on a starters wage like mine. Dad would be better off homeless, altho I have no faith that they would see to his situation quicker.

They would probably still tell homeless people to phone up or go online!!

Rant over. Sorry xx

Comments

  • suncatcher
    suncatcher Member Posts: 2,174
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    I can understand you have no faith in the system most people struggle with it and they are the ones who actualy need it the most. and those who dont need it seem to know all the tricks :x and get it its not right at all. I really hope they sort this situation out soon maybe the gp could help or citizans advice to help him. This is a worry he could do with out and for you also sorry to hear this hope things get sorted soon joanne :)
    Joanne
  • shelleymogui
    shelleymogui Member Posts: 88
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    I can understand you have no faith in the system most people struggle with it and they are the ones who actualy need it the most. and those who dont need it seem to know all the tricks :x and get it its not right at all. I really hope they sort this situation out soon maybe the gp could help or citizans advice to help him. This is a worry he could do with out and for you also sorry to hear this hope things get sorted soon joanne :)

    Hi Joanne,

    Yeah it seems very much that way with the the wrong people knowing how to work the 'system', and its them that make the 'system' cynical when it comes to actual genuine people who need help.

    He has been to citizens advice and got nowhere, altho trying a new link from NHS warrington which might help, ill keep you posted but i wont hold my breath.

    xx
  • frogmorton
    frogmorton Member Posts: 29,978
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Blimey Shelly
    What a mess poor you and your Dad. I presume you have already tried CAB?
    You are so right about the stress not helping him the poor man.
    Don't forgte now you know his dose you can buy the ibupfofen over the counter at about 32p at supermarkets. Just a little bit of help?
    I do hope you get it sorted very soon. You are a lovely daughter and I am sure your Dad appreciates you very much.
    Do keep coming on here and we will do our best to support you both
    Take care
    Toni x

    [Always consult your GP or healthcare team when making any changes to medication - Moderator(T)]
  • elnafinn
    elnafinn Member Posts: 7,412
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Shelley

    Isn't there a clause that if you have been out of the country for some time you can top up NI payments or am I talking a load of nonsense and this would not help your dad anyway now?

    Luv
    Elna x
    The happiest people don't have the best of everything. They just make the best of everything.

    If you can lay down at night knowing in your heart that you made someone's day just a little bit better, you know you had a good day.
  • jenzie06
    jenzie06 Member Posts: 708
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Shelley,
    Really sorry to hear about your dad.
    Have you thought about a prescription prepayment card, its costs approx £104 but you can pay monthly?
    I can understand your frustration with the benefits systems. They are really, really good at telling you what you should of done years ago. They told me I should have claimed incapacity when I was younger. Instead I tried to plod on with daily life, went to uni and even got a masters degree. Now the RA is really starting to bite I'm not eligible. They will pay my NI contributions but they only go toward pension, nothing else. But because they pay NI I have to jump through hoop after hoop. Next is the medical and its worrying me so much its making me poorly - stupid huh?!!
    Was told by CAB that even though the system sucks there is no chance to change it as it's used as a political tool. I can't understand how some people get away with claiming thousands of pounds and others can't get anything!
    Feel like screaming!!!
  • airwave
    airwave Member Posts: 579
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Its as Shelly says, a political football to be kicked around until its dead, and another subject is found, then its election time and it starts all over again.

    I have found, recently, what its like to be 'outside the system'. Not very pleasant and thats just because I have arther hanging around.

    My heart goes out to the people that fall between the rules of our system, the system cannot stop everyones descent into poor health but neither does it attempt to cushion the final inches. It gives to others but not those who are desperate.

    I have no answer, it is a political one thats needed.
    8) Its a grin, honest!
  • woodbon
    woodbon Member Posts: 4,969
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi, I don't know what to suggest, the helpline may be able to point you in the direction of the organisations that offer advice on welfare and benifits. It must be hard for all of you at the moment and I feel for you. Good luck, I hope you find the answer soon. Love Sue
  • elnafinn
    elnafinn Member Posts: 7,412
    edited 17. Aug 2009, 17:10
    Hi Shelley

    I really do feel for you and your dad. You should not be expected to look after your dad. The trouble is if they know that he is living with you, they will think that is ok but that is not the point is it and it is a huge burden and worry for you to be carrying.

    I can only suggest that you give a call to the Helpline here tomorrow, explain it all to them and see what they can suggest. They will give you all the time you need to put them in the picture so they fully understand all the ins and outs and they will be able to ask you questions directly which will be much easier for you.

    Stay strong, difficult though that is to do. I can well appreciate that.

    Luv
    Elna x
    The happiest people don't have the best of everything. They just make the best of everything.

    If you can lay down at night knowing in your heart that you made someone's day just a little bit better, you know you had a good day.
  • lindah
    lindah Member Posts: 445
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Don't have any answers for you I'm afraid but just to reiterate that we can offer support on here when you need us.
    You are doing a fine job helping your dad,imagine how hard it would be in Spain on his own.
    AS Colin always says keep your chin up.
    Linda H 8)
  • annebr
    annebr Member Posts: 730
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Shelley,

    Not sure what age your dad is?

    However, my in-laws contacted Help The Aged. They provided a great deal of assistance on what could be claimed for and what help could be given.

    Sorry if your Dad doesn't fit into this age bracket.

    On another note you are doing a great job of helping and supporting your Dad.

    Anne
  • elnafinn
    elnafinn Member Posts: 7,412
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Shelley

    I so hope you are feeling a little calmer today. I am sure if you call the helpline they will do their utmost to help and point you in the right direction - at least they will give you their time.

    Luv
    Elna x
    The happiest people don't have the best of everything. They just make the best of everything.

    If you can lay down at night knowing in your heart that you made someone's day just a little bit better, you know you had a good day.
  • shelleymogui
    shelleymogui Member Posts: 88
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Wow thank you all. I have come on here today fresh and your advice and lovely words have really helped.

    Frogmorton: I tried CAB at the beginning, they were helpful to a point but then we got moved to benefit and jobcentre lines, these are the ones who have given conflicting advice. I dont really mind about the money but he really wants to contribute (however when he does im gonna stash it for him so that when he does move out, he might have a small deposit or something). It would also help as i am funding him with like spends for getting out (He only goes to the Co-op and gets some nice bread for his dinner -re earlier posts ill pay for anything to get him to eat he lost 11ibs in 2 weeks and then another 6lb in a week. I f only i could do that!) but it all adds up and just had a call from barclays saying they are going to reduce my overdraft as a year since graduated...eeek

    Elna- I will look into top ups but I will have to pay it, or he could maybe pay it off IF he gets any financial help.

    Jenzie- I saw someone elses post about this card, which would be helpful. I will wait it out a bit longer as we hav applied for the help with prescription costs, but it is a very good idea.

    Airwave- Sorry you fell through the cracks too of the shambles they call a benefit system, the only benefitting I see going on is to people who know how to work it somehow. I will find a way and I will let you know when I do.

    Woodbon- I tried the benefits helpline who helped for abit, said they'd put him through and then line went dead, did it again said he'd put him thru and went back to options, i think he did it 7 times before going, ill try again tomorrow. Thanks for your help, I am still going to bug the benefits line....I also have a friend who is working at the jobcentre in benefits so I will try that again too.

    Elna- The caring part is fine for me, and after Spain all I wanted was him back here and I got my wish even more, him living with me so I can't grumble whatsoever. Its just we need a plan like he is only 56 he can work again if the pain eases, he needs money and a plan for a house, mind ya he might recover and get a job quicker than get benefits here! Might be worth making a contingency plan without benefit?

    Lindah- As above, I hate to think how he'd be living if he was alone in spain and he definitely wouldnt be eating!. Thanks for your support :)

    Annebr- He is 56 and I have been in contact with Age Concern who have sent loads of info and been very helpful but obviously when push comes to shove we still need the money off someone else. Thanks for your advice and I will try Help the Aged :)

    Elna- Thanks for your ongoing support and for thinking of me to post again this morning. Was telling Dad last night just how lovely you all are and that he should get computer literate so he can share with you himself. I might try and get him on here later.

    I found a website yesterday for Warrington and its kind of a CAB outreach project at the various doctors, for people who cant get to the CAB appointments or need more in-depth help. Theres a choice of times and venues to go as some surgeries take other members from other drs which is ace. Really boosted Dads spirits last night as it gave him a bit of hope. I told him as one door closes, another opens but I just hope we can get to talk to a real life person who can talk to Dad about his iindividual situation.

    Thanks again all.

    Love Shelley (sorry for the long post) :oops: xxxx
  • skezier
    skezier Member Posts: 11,333
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Shelley,

    I am sorry I can't help with any advice as I don't know much about help you may or may not be able to get but I just wanted to say I really hope you can get some help and get it soon. It seems unfair to me that people have to fight so hard for everything cus there is enough pressure on them just dealing with it all already.

    Good luck and a ((( ))) is all I can offer. Take care Cris x
  • suncatcher
    suncatcher Member Posts: 2,174
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    We were turned down for attendance allowance for me dad and my sister has to do such a lot for him they say he aint bad enough yet. :x you have to be litraly desperate to get it by the look of it its so hard to get the entitalments and scroungers just get it if you ask me thing have got worse and getting a lot worse for disabled people not better :x keep us updated on your dad joanne
    Joanne