Lack of mobility and being alone

sharmaine · 26. Sep 2009, 07:08

Hi all

I'm feeling very lonely today. Hubby is at work, my son is at work and my daughter-in-law is probably out with her friends. I've been stuck indoors most of the week. I did go to the chemists in the village but that's about it. I can't even go to the shops on my own. One hand is occupied with the stick which only leaves one hand free to carry anything. I find the shopping centre hard work the flat floors kill my knees.

I suppose we all have days like this ...I'm just feeling a bit down. I may go and sit in the garden with a cup of tea and read. I'm just missing company. I may even tackle the mending.

Have a good weekend everyone ...apologies in advance for moaning.

Sharmaine

madness1985 · 26. Sep 2009, 07:25

Hello,

just want to say your not alone. I feel exactly the same. Most of week i stay alone in the house the only time i go out mon-fri is if my partner takes my bro home from college! Its depressing i agree today im home as my neck is hurting alot!

Take care xx

minky67 · 26. Sep 2009, 07:26

hi & sorry your feeling down,join the club me too.
if youve got a hand free have you thought about buying 1 of those shopping trolleys. either 1 that you can push with both hands or 1 that you can pull behind you.
worth a thought ah!
hope you feel better soon,dont think the gloomy weather or the thought of winter helps.
luv debs

page35 · 26. Sep 2009, 07:28

Hi
i am on my own too at the mo. although they will all be back soon (OH and kids) i look forward to a bit of time to myself then after an hour i want them to all come back :roll:
im sorry you have been stuck in all week. i think getting in the garden with a cuppa is a good idea, i do that quite alot at least it is out of the house

sorry i am not much good at cheering people up, but just wanted to reply to you

dean76 · 26. Sep 2009, 07:31

Hi Sharmaine

Sorry your having a bad day. Do your family know exactly how your feeling or is it difficult to tell them? Because mine try to make out that nothing is wrong which annoys me when deepdown I know that its just that they dont want to believe it sometimes. I can only chat on here or to my friend in work but she only works Mon-Thu which is hard.

Do you have a favourite DVD or song that makes you laugh and cheers you up? Perhaps have a go at making your own Christmas/Birthday cards cross-stitch or using card and ribbon offcuts? to save money and get you ahead of time for the festive season?

How are you feeling right now; sometimes telling it as it is will get it off you chest and releasing the burden and loneliness will make you and another who reads these postings with the same feelings feel alot better.

I tend to write things down when I feeling lonely. I know others have different ways of expressing themselves.

Sorry I cant be more help; perhaps someone else will have more advice for you.

(((((((( big hugs ))))))))))))))

Dean xxxx

skezier · 26. Sep 2009, 08:25

Hi Sharmaine,

Sorry you feeling a bit down today and I reckon the book and the garden is probably a good idea as well. they will all be home again soon and well a ((( ))) and a hope the day gets better for you. Cris x

woodbon · 26. Sep 2009, 08:31

Hi,
I'm in a similar position, driving now makes my wrists so sore it puts me off going out unless I really have too. The village I live in is very quiet, and sometimes I don't see anyone from the time my husband goes to work, until he comes home. Sometimes I don't mind, but some days I get really sorry for myself! :? So you are certainly not alone. Love Sue

PS What is this thing called mending? I don't understand the concept!

airwave · 26. Sep 2009, 08:33

I'm on my own this weekend, F1 qualifying today, race tomorrow, might find a whisky later. I expect my OH will come home on Sunday and ask what I've been doing all w/e!

8) Its a grin, honest!

pottypam · 26. Sep 2009, 08:36

Hi, have been away awhile , and after my second hip replacement last thurs am geting back on my feet , (sorry ) lol But i can totally empathis with those of us who feel lonley as i do nearly every day, or should say nearly every day , I live alone so got no one to look forward to coming home , I thought i could manage and i do , but there are days i hate it , but i watch films read books talk to myself lol, a lot , and i plan forthe future what ever or when ever that is , first hip last year almost to the day planned for things after ,and sods law some things went wrong , other hip got worse and now have had that done and i hope that i can put some of those plans into action, . I refused to hold my kids back when they wanted to leave home , and though i missed them and they felt guilty i had managed with arthritis in my back for so many years i knew i would manage , physically , but mentally ,well am beginning t o wonder of my sanity lol, but got to laugh but must admit would be nice to know that there is some who will come in and make me a cuppa . I get tired so not brill company all the time . Can not walk far hands do not carry but after the last 2 years of hip ops , cancer and pulmonry embolisms two in two years I am still here and planning , going on a cruise ,in nov ,yay, so chin up try and not let this thing get us down, ,, or am i mad ,?

sharmaine · 26. Sep 2009, 09:04

Hello everyone
Thanks for your lovely messages. My son just 'phoned to say hello and that he's full of cold - I've told him to stay away because I've got my appointment at the fracture clinic with the specialist on Tuesday! It was just nice to hear from him. He's married now and I'm hoping that my knees get fixed before they decide to have children....I'm sooo looking forward to being a grandmother - they've told me to wait a couple of years!!

My goodness Pam you are a star and I'm beginning to feel less lonely already. You've come through a lot of stuff - cancer too and yet you sound cherry and positive - you're an example to all of us. Enjoy your cruise in November and I hope your back doesn't trouble you too much.

I decided to wash my hair, do my nails and I've even put on my make up etc. I've made tonight's meal pork stronganoff (with the wild mushrooms we got from the forest) and it's not even 2.00pm yet - set the table and the rest of the afternoon is mine. My shopping is about to be delivered and then I thought I would drive to the sea front and try and little amble. It's only 5 minutes away.
I'm going to come home and have a cup of tea and watch a film. I know there are people out there who would love a day like mine.....but I do feel alone sometimes and out of touch with things.
I bought a keyboard and I'm teaching myself how to play. I've just very badly played "Oh When the Saints Go Marching In"!! I'm not in the mood for self-education today!

I do try and make plans to keep occupied - next week I'm making chilli jam - I've got 3 chilli plants bursting with chillis. It's a favourite of mine and my son and daughter-in-law love it. I want to make some marmalade ready for the winter months. Nothing like your own marmalade and I love making it with satsumas or mandarins or a mixture of both. I'm a bit of a foodie and like home made soups; pickles; chutneys etc. My dad was a chef and some of it has rubbed off onto me.

Thanks for all your responses - I very nearly didn't post it because I thought you would think I was a silly mare! I then realised that I'm going to be 54 in 5 months time - how depressing is that!!!!

Enjoy the rest of your day. I'll be fine when my man gets in from work. I've missed him.

Lots of love to you all.

Sharmaine
X

pottypam · 26. Sep 2009, 09:15

Oh sharmaine , you make me jealous lol, but I am 54 in october , and i want to know where the last few years have gone ,i seem to have been on auto mode lol, I can not drive for another 5 weeks yuk, and it making me mad already . I want to pop to the sea front and get an ice cream ,mmmmm
but that be next week,
I am taking all a carefully as the cruise is my first hol in 8 years, sold my flat to get the money and IT IS going to be good nothing is going to stop me and its great being a grandma , i have two and waiting for more lol
off to get a cuppa now ,

eckstardeluxe · 26. Sep 2009, 09:29

Hi Sharmaine, I know how you feel. Because I got flu this week they suddenly get really heavy handed with you now and advised me not to go out etc. It's just been normal flu as I'm feeling better already so assume it is. But sitting in the house when the kids were at childcare and hubby working had me in knots, bored rigid. I ended up taking photos of all the kid's old toys and putting them on ebay to get ready for Christmas.

A few of them sitting pretty, one at £18 with 2 days left. I'd thought of doing it for a while and the boredom gave me the push.

I hope you feel a little better for sharing, but like me why not take this time to do something that doesn't need tons of effort you've been thinking of to at least keep your mind occupied. It really helps.

take care

eck
xxx

sharmaine · 26. Sep 2009, 10:44

Hi
My husband loves Formula 1 - I expect we won't be doing much when that's on!

Enjoy your day.
Sharmaine

airwave wrote:

I'm on my own this weekend, F1 qualifying today, race tomorrow, might find a whisky later. I expect my OH will come home on Sunday and ask what I've been doing all w/e!

8) Its a grin, honest!

sharmaine · 26. Sep 2009, 10:47

Hi Eck
Good luck with your ebay stuff! After having my moan - I had a shower and tackled a few things. I'm off to watch a film - a wee slice of fruit cake and a cup of tea. I'm organised and husband will be one in a few hours.

I appreciate your comments.

Sharmaine

PS Christmas - I must start thinking about presents! OMG!!!!

sharmaine · 26. Sep 2009, 10:51

Hi Pam

I've got a tub of ice cream in the freezer and some cones - I may have one while I watch the tv.

You must have a brilliant time on that cruise - 8 years is a long time not to have had a holiday. Make the most of it and I hope you get better soon. You'll have to watch QVC or Ideal whatever and buy a couple of cruising outfits! How wonderful.

I hope you have somewhere to live now that you've sold your flat!

Sharmaine

sharmaine · 26. Sep 2009, 10:54

Hi
I did try and ignore the mending for weeks but my husband kept losing money from his pockets (can't have that) so I've patched those up; he's managed to rip the cord from 2 pairs of pyjamas so I've fixed those; put on missing buttons etc. It was quite rewarding getting it out of the way. I've lost my thimble and stabbed my finger a few times. I'll have to buy another.

I think I had one of those days of missing people today.
Sharmaine

woodbon wrote:

Hi,
I'm in a similar position, driving now makes my wrists so sore it puts me off going out unless I really have too. The village I live in is very quiet, and sometimes I don't see anyone from the time my husband goes to work, until he comes home. Sometimes I don't mind, but some days I get really sorry for myself! :? So you are certainly not alone. Love Sue
PS What is this thing called mending? I don't understand the concept!

annebr · 26. Sep 2009, 13:34

Sharmaine,

First of all can I ask about chilli jam? My OH loves things like that and I am really intrested in what that tastes like. Is it easy to make & are chillis easy to grow for someone hopeless like me?

Hope you managed to keep yourself busy and had a not too bad day? There is a festival on this weekend where I live, local hol, and my OH took me out and we seen some of the street performers and a wander round the continental market. Even met a friend and went to the pub but it's not the same when you can't drink. Then about 4pm i was exhaused so OH brought me home and he wen for a couple of pints.

Must admit that is the thing that gets to me in the old days on a weekend like this it would have been party on but now I cant. I know what you mean about the lonlieness I am the same during the week, although this site and the phone keep me going.

Love Anne

debatat · 26. Sep 2009, 14:36

Hi Sharmaine, sorry it has been one of those days. I hope it passed quickly. It can be hard sometimes. I hope you have a lovely evening.
Are you going to watch X factor or are you a strictly fan, or maybe you have a better social life than me!!!!

Deb x

bevman · 26. Sep 2009, 14:50

I'm feeling very lonely today. Hubby is at work, my son is at work and my daughter-in-law is probably out with her friends. I've been stuck indoors most of the week. I did go to the chemists in the village but that's about it. I can't even go to the shops on my own. One hand is occupied with the stick which only leaves one hand free to carry anything. I find the shopping centre hard work the flat floors kill my knees.

I suppose we all have days like this ...I'm just feeling a bit down. I may go and sit in the garden with a cup of tea and read. I'm just missing company. I may even tackle the mending.

Have a good weekend everyone ...apologies in advance for moaning.

Sharmaine[/quote]Hi sharmain i think it is great that you can make all those great things as you may no it is my OH that has severe RA and when he gets a bit down i tell him to put his i pod on and listen to some music it usually cheers him up (mind you good job he has ear phones his taste in music is well not the same as mine) i think coming on this site is great there is always somebody who nos exactley how you feel.My husband loves F1 to and no doubt will be watching cannot see the point myself driving round and round but i suppose it is a man thing. take care Alison & Laurence

dachshund · 27. Sep 2009, 10:20

Hi Sharmaine.
I'm sorry why dont you get a mobility scoota it will take you to the shops you can leave it outside and walk around the shop and then go home on the scoota,
thats what i do. its lovely. joan xx

penfactor · 3. Oct 2009, 22:23

Hello - being alone so much has definitely driven me mad - I am not the same person i was in January, busy at work, seeing friends, interested in everything. Now I sometimes try and sleep all day to get it over with, lost interest in tv, music struggle to even read - am so scared of everything now I know this is not normal. My op is in two weeks but can't see me recovering mentally now. :-(

elnafinn · 4. Oct 2009, 02:54

Dear Pennie

I am sorry to read your posting and feel very sad to hear that you try to sleep all day to forget all. You do seem incredibly low in yourself to have lost interest in and be scared of life in general. It must be unimagineably awful for you. I read that you cannot take anti depressants, something which may help you over this hurdle. You did not say why you cannot take them though. It would certainly help if you were feeling stronger mentally before your impending operation and aid your recovery too. Have you spoken to anyone else about how you are really feeling, besides us as I really feel that you ought to do so.

After your op, will you be having anyone help you for a while when you return home? Even if it is only someone for company for part of the day.

I do hope you feel a little better in every way soon and wish you well with your operation.

Luv
Elna x

Lack of mobility and being alone

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