everything's so hard

trisher

Hi
I have not been on here for the last few days.


It seems I'm trying to climb this mountain, but it's just too tall and everywhere it is dark. I cannot climb it any more.Every time I try climb I just fall down.

Some of you know about my hubby,things are still the same. I have tried to hold it all together but I cannot,I have tried and tried. It makes no difference

I feel so very bad as I thought I would be able to climb everything
life has thrown at me but not now I just can't get up there anymore. I cannot cope at all now. It's too much much. I feel so alone.

I can't write anymore either.
trisher

angel1

It`s not surprising that you are feeling so very low Trisher. This whole sad business has dragged on for so long now, and you must feel like you`re in Limbo. I imagine not being in your own home must be intolerable too.

Have you been able to talk at length, and ask all the questions that must be troubling you, with the consultant at the hospital? Sometimes it helps to focus on the bigger picture, and long term situation, no matter how distressing that may be. I feel that that is the only way forward.

You have been amazing so far, and I cannot tell you the extent of my admiration for you. I truly hope you can find some peace of mind very soon...........Much love........Ange.

sharmaine

Hi Trisher

I'm sorry to hear that you're finding things so tough. You are right to get your feelings out. I'm not sure exactly what your circumstances are but gather from reading other messages that you're not home.

Having arthur is tough and when you're feeling down it makes it seem worse. Try and do something for yourself even if it going to the hairdressers or getting a new top. If you can't do this then contact a friend and meet them for a coffee. Don't let misery embrace you too much otherwise it will take longer to shake it off.

I hope that someone on here will find a way of helping you. So keep on posting.

Lots of cyber hugs and best wishes.

Sharmaine

elnafinn

Dear Trisher

I have noticed that you have not been on here the past few days although you were on here in the early hours this morning, as I was looking in too, because I do not sleep too well, due to pain, not worries. Many people are looking out for you, but we/they cannot help if you do not ask.

I also notice when you are on the forum, you prefer to be on the chitchat zone, living the fantasy life on the cruiser and in the cafe.This has worried me somewhat because you are not telling how you are really feeling and from the little you have told us, I know you are going through a very anguished time and have been for many, many weeks. I can see that you are hiding your true feeling so much as I do read all you have said about what has happened in your life and what is happening now. You are a very strong person and have been most of the time, but you cannot keep up this fascade indefinitely. Your husband being critically ill, him being your carer, you having had a hand operation, is totally devastating for you and anybody would understand that. I do not know how much you talk to the staff/consultants looking after your husband etc and how much you talk to other people about how you are truly feeling but if you are not, then you will arrive at a bursting point which is probably now, because you cannot keep all this inside, trying to push it down and away and sort of pretend it is not happening because it has/ is ongoing at this time.

Some of us have said before you must talk to someone and pour out your heart and how terrified you are feeling about life. I believe you are a very private person but now is the time to find someone you trust and talk and let all your emotions pour out.

I beg you, dear Trisher, to get help in motion for yourself now.

Lots of love
Elna x(())

skezier

Hi Trish,

Its not surprising your having trouble climbing your mountains at the min. Its been a very long road for you and I really belive that the longer something goes on the harder it gets to climb.

Trish I really agree with the others and I know from personal experience counselling truly helps. I think, and I may be wrong, your a bit like me and don't like to say how you really feel and thats where counselling is so good. Its a way of helping you deal with the cyclone inside you.

I really hope they have someone who can come in and see you very soon. Is there a hospital one you can talk to? As Ange said sometimes its so hard to ask questions, especially if you don't really want the answers but though you feel alone Trish your not. Is there a kind and nice Ward sister? They do understand were relatives are coming from and maybe you could talk to her/him?

A real genuine (((((( )))))) and love

Cris xx

debatat

Trisher, you have been so brave and coped with so much. The longer a situation goes on, the more exhausting it is. I would imagine that not being at home, amongst your own familiar things would be hard to cope with. Could you have a chat with some of the staff at the respite? I know you are busy with the other patients, but it is your turn now for some comfort, you are more than entitled to it.

You could also talk to the staff at the hospital, they will be used to having to deal with family questions and fears.

The helpline would listen if you just wanted to chat, as I am sure your gp would. Talk to someone Trish. Keep posting so we know how you are.

Hugs

Deb x

frogmorton

Hi Trisher
Oh dear.
Trisher why don't you stop climbing for a bit and have a rest - we will hold you up and then the reserves will come back maybe.
The others have given you some brilliant advice - I just want to say look after you a little and that we care.
Love
Toni xx

minky67

Hi Trisher,i can't really add any more advice than you've all ready been given.I just wanted to let you know we all here for you & thinking of you.
please try to rest & take some time for yourself.
please let us know when your ready that you are ok.
luv & hugs debs

dachshund

Hi Trisher.
I've been thinking about you and i had not seen any posts from you.
we all think about you and we care.
have you got anybody to talk to to help you.
please take care of yourself.
love joan xx

annie_mial

I have sent you a PM

Love
Annie

jordan7j

Trisher, so many people on here care so much about you, i know you already know that. Please take not of the lovely replies, I have no more to add, it has all been said by people who care so much. We are all here for you, thinking of you all the time. Jay x

ritwren

Trisher I have followed most of what's been happening to you and your Husband. Although I don't know you I do wish you nothing but the best. You truely have friends and others who care about what's happening to you on here. I believe you have taken a huge step today by admitting how dificult things are and hope things start to get to a better place for you soon. Everything has already been said and I can add nothing other than to say Counselling really can help.
Good luck
rita

joanlawson

Hi Trisher

I have sent you a pm

Joan

Wonkylegs

HI Trisher,

so sorry to hear you are feeling like this. It is not a surprise though, just look at what you are coping with - ANYONE would buckle with a few of these but you have so many things to deal with that it is time you let someone help you to deal with some of it, and share the load a bit.

No-one can shoulder all of this on their own, however independent and private they are .... far from being a negative thing, asking for, and accepting, help is a really really positive and brave thing to do.

I will be thinking of you and please do find someone to talk to.

much love,
WOnky

suziev

hi trisher

i think if i was in your shoes i would feel the same way.
i think you have done so well over the last month and you have been so brave, however it's so hard to stay strong all the time .
hang on in there pet, it will be ok in the end
suzie x

snowdrop

Hi
Im so sorry ur feeling so low... do u have facebook? pm me if u do we can chat on there if u like....
Always seems no one is there but were all here to support each other

Big hugs Alli xxx

woodbon

Hello Trisher,
I've just droped in to say that I agree with the others, you do need to talk to someone. Just a thought, but some hospitals have people you can talk to when things are really bad. It may be that if you ask a doctor, the ward sister or any of the nursing staff, they may be able to provide someone for you to talk to who is trained to deal with the hard problems you have.

I hope, whatever you do, things will work out for you in the long run. Having your husband in hospital must be very tiring for you, so take as much care of yourself as possilbe.
Thinking of you, Love Sue xxxx

chris7

Trisher

Just popping in to say hello and hope the mountain not quite so steep today. We are all thinking of you and wishing things would improve. Take care, rest if you can and do speak to the staff and let them know how you feel.
lots of love
Chris xx