Bad week

maud48
maud48 Member Posts: 170
edited 3. Jan 2010, 13:00 in Living with Arthritis archive
Hello everyone. Had a good time in France at Christmas but am really paying for it now. I really wanted OH to have a holiday, which isn't easy with a hyperactive 4 year old, so joined in with everything. I also find it hard to say I can't do things, still that old guilt. Got really ill on the ferry on the way back and as I've never been travel sick in my life and I've travelled all over the world in planes (including small 2 seaters) trains, boats, cars, buses etc, can only think it was caused by the problems with my neck which I am still waiting to be investigated (trapped blood vessel???).
This last week has been so difficult, feeling so knocked out and in so much pain I can't get comfortable anywhere or do anything.
OH is being lovely but I feel so bad he has to cope with grandson bouncing off the walls plus me.
I'm trying so hard to stay positive and cheerful but am getting really frightened about what the future holds and how long we can go on like this
maudxx

Comments

  • skezier
    skezier Member Posts: 11,333
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Maud,

    I was really pleased to see you enjoyed your self in France. I hope you weren't caught up in the mayhem of snow re crossings?

    Its horrible that we have to pay for every bit of normal life we do! I know my neck doesn't like trains too much and I don't think it would like the ferry, haven't tried that one though. Do you know when they are going to get on with the investigations?

    I am sorry your feeling down and frightened. I have to say its horrible place to be. Often I get very scared but after 20 something years as yet none of the fears I had have happened. I try to balance what scares me with what I can sill do and get away with..... That and knowing the fears may come but its not today.

    I wish you a better and a kinder new year and sending you a ((((( ))))) Luv Cris x
  • maud48
    maud48 Member Posts: 170
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Skezier
    Thnaks for your lovely reply.
    The crossing was remarkably easy although the roads in France were very bad so we had a few digging out incidents. It was really pretty and the children loved making snowmen.
    I'm not really frightened for myself, more ofr my grandson and OH - he's 61 and has to cope with looking after grandson, demanding job and me. Fortunately his health is good but if he gets ill then the whole thing will fall apart and I don't know what will happen,
    maudxx
    skezier wrote:
    Hi Maud,

    I was really pleased to see you enjoyed your self in France. I hope you weren't caught up in the mayhem of snow re crossings?

    Its horrible that we have to pay for every bit of normal life we do! I know my neck doesn't like trains too much and I don't think it would like the ferry, haven't tried that one though. Do you know when they are going to get on with the investigations?

    I am sorry your feeling down and frightened. I have to say its horrible place to be. Often I get very scared but after 20 something years as yet none of the fears I had have happened. I try to balance what scares me with what I can sill do and get away with..... That and knowing the fears may come but its not today.

    I wish you a better and a kinder new year and sending you a ((((( ))))) Luv Cris x
  • tkachev
    tkachev Member Posts: 8,332
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Maud
    Welcome back,
    We were worried that you were caught up on the euro tunnel mayhem.Glad you avoided it.
    Life is one big worry.But most fears prove unfounded,as Skezier said.We have to face each problem one a a time and try not to think of the ifs and buts.
    Your husband is doing the best he can but of course you never know what they are thinking or if they will suddenly explode!I do worry about exactly the same.
    He is coping at the moment so give him lots of praise.Something I oftrn forget to do for my partner.
    Love from Elizabeth
    X
    Never be bullied into silence.
    Never allow yourself to be made a victim.
    Accept no ones definition of your life

    Define yourself........

    Harvey Fierstein
  • skezier
    skezier Member Posts: 11,333
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Maud,

    Oh I should love to build a snowman but did yours fly away Christmas eve for an hour or so :wink:

    Its a similar kind of worry to mine in a way. I don't worry for my self but I do 'the employers' ( a motley bunch of reject animals that would be hard to rehome). At one point I was so bad I got some counselling and well the best advice she gave me really was about doing the what if game. I am lucky cus I do a lot of visualization in the coping mechanism, I stuck the oa in a hamster ball and now the pa is in with it :wink: But I also visualise a big switch in a room...... I then visualize it being shut off.....Its my worry switch and turning it off sort of helps.

    I think we all do eventually work out our own way in dealing both with the arthritis and also the baggage it brings. The what if 'game' is not worth giving time to. I think also what ever comes you will cope flower, its not going to come at the mo, and my old poor worn out councillor used to keep saying and it may NEVER happen.

    You take care, tr and keep resting and hopefully tomorrow will be a better day for you. Luv Cris xx
  • maud48
    maud48 Member Posts: 170
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Elizabeth and Cris,
    you're right my OH keeps telling me there's no point in worrying but somehow you saying it makes me take more notice.
    I don't know if the snowmen flew away as I was tucked up in bed. We watched the DVD of the snowman after we'd made them and after the children were in bed my son went out and changed them a bit so it looked like they'd moved, so the children were convinced they had.
    We were listening to the traffic news all the way to Dover telling of delays on the ferries and traffic jams. We avoided the M20 and got there really early as the road was clear. I don't think the ferries were full as they put us on an earlier one.
    OH back to work tomorrow and grandson back to school. Fortunately he's settled in really well with full time one-to-one help. Tomorrow I'll work on getting myself in better shape, for now I'm staying on the sofa in my thermals watching football on the telly,
    maudxx
  • joyful164
    joyful164 Member Posts: 2,401
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hello Maud.

    It seems to me that you did very well and it sounds like you had a lovely time. I'm a worrier and I whittle. Wouldn't be human if we didn't.
    Skezier has come across with some very good advice and I have taken note myself.
    Hope you enjoy your chill out day watching football.
    Cannot believe that Man U got beaten by Leeds t home. Kettering Town played Leeds U some weeks back into extra time and then got beaten during the last 5 or so. Kettering Town is our local team

    Hope you get your neck sort asap.
    joy