Ohhhh need some advise..........

parky2

Hi Guys

Well thankfully the dreaded RA has been more or less under control and the mtx injections have got.........slightly more bareable!! :? After almost a year to get things under control I thought I would rock the boat.......we want a baby so I have stopped all meds! :shock: Obviously I have to be off my meds for 6 months before we can try. Stopped my mtx on 24th November and so far have been relatively ok. Have however spent the last 3 weeks off work with a chest/throat infection :roll: The past few days however those old familiar pains and stiffness have started to creep back in, that coupled with the fact that I am totally exhausted. I cant tell hubby or he will insist I start my meds again (despite the fact that he wants a baby as much as I do) I havent told my mum and dad that I have stopped my meds (as much as they would want us to be happy they wouldnt want me 'suffering' in the process) and tonight I feel utterly miseable

I am supposed to be starting back to work on Monday (think I will already be in for quite a grilling cause I have been off sick again) and the thought of it makes me want to cry. I am so stiff and sore and am fast slipping down that road of feeling totally miserable.

Im not even sure what Im asking you or if what I have said makes any sense I just needed to get out how I feel.

Does anyone know if there is any point in contacting my RA nurse or GP? I guess Im worried they will just say I have brought it on myself by stopping my meds (well I didnt just stop them, we discussed and agreed at my last appt)

Sorry for the ramble and thank you for listening

Linz xox

valval

(((hug))) you want a family that i can understand and it not your fault you are feeling this way. so glad you have got it off your chest . give them a call they might be able to give you some advice

woodbon

Hello, It must be very hard for you at the moment, trying to make light of feeling ill, suffering a nasty infection and the arthritis pain worries. Being ill makes everyone feel down and makes it harder to cope, and this is a hard time of the year for everyone, I always thinK! :?

So, yes, I do think you should talk to either your rhemmy nurse or GP, whichever you feel happist talking to. They may have something to offer to make you feel better. Or just be able to chat to you and give you some support. Don't worry about taking up their time, thats what they are there for! Good Luck for the future! Love Sue

parky2

Thank you both for your replies. Im seriously considering telling my mum and dad that I have stopped my meds, I know they cant make things better but Im thinking that maybe that extra little bit of support might be good. I really didnt want it to come to this, for once I just wanted something 'normal' I didnt want them to know our plans I guess.

I think I might phone my GP in the morning and see if I can get an appointment. I very rarely let my RA impact on my life but I guess this is one of those times I dont have control.

Thanks again
Linz xox

wibberley

Hi Linz, how frustrating for you.

I definitely think you should go back and talk with your rheumy nurse or gp. There may be something you can take...possibly not quite as effective as mtx but to take the edge off the pain and allow you to function normally.

I've heard good things about tens machines helping with pain and fingers crossed that machine might come in handy for an alltogether different kind of discomfort in time! You may be able to hire one to try before you buy, from your local surgery, I know I was when in labour.

I'd consider telling family too. They may be angry at first, but only because they care about you and keeping things to yourself might not be helping your stress levels which can to make arthritis feel worse.

Good luck!

Lois x

angel1

How very sad that something that should be such a joy - having a baby - is causing you so much pain, and unhappiness.

I feel that you absolutely must tell your husband how you are feeling. You need him with you every step of the way, no secrets.
The same with mum and dad. They will all be sensing that something isn`t quite right anyway, because they care about you. And, more importantly, you need the total support of all of them. You can`t do all this on your own.

With regards to work Linz, they do not have the right to "grill" you. You have a very serious illness, and their actions could be seen as bullying. Stand up for yourself in the nicest possible way.

Do talk to your GP,and/or Rheumy. They have a lot of experience with women with your condition, who want to start a family. They may have some helpful information for you..........Ange.

porrig

Hi, I'm soon to be in the same position as you - we want to start trying to have a family, and I'm thinking of coming off mtx in a couple of months time.

I saw my rheumy on Wednesday and she told me that i could keep taking the plaquenil and naproxen though, it was only the mtx that i had to stop. Have you discussed any other medications you could take that wouldn't harm your chances of conceiving?

I know it'll be different for me as a man than you, but I'd have thought there'd be something you can still take, even if its just to take the edge off?

tkachev

I took sulfasalazine throughout my pregnancy.I had all my children before ever taking MTX so didnt have that worry.But I know they advise you to get it out of your system first.
Good luck and hope the aches and pains are just a blip from your recent cold.
Elizabeth

parky2

angel1 wrote:

How very sad that something that should be such a joy - having a baby - is causing you so much pain, and unhappiness.

I feel that you absolutely must tell your husband how you are feeling. You need him with you every step of the way, no secrets.
The same with mum and dad. They will all be sensing that something isn`t quite right anyway, because they care about you. And, more importantly, you need the total support of all of them. You can`t do all this on your own.

With regards to work Linz, they do not have the right to "grill" you. You have a very serious illness, and their actions could be seen as bullying. Stand up for yourself in the nicest possible way.

Do talk to your GP,and/or Rheumy. They have a lot of experience with women with your condition, who want to start a family. They may have some helpful information for you..........Ange.

Thank you Ange for your lovely post. I have taken your advice and spoken to my hubby. I think he already sensed that all was not well to be honest. He agreed that we need to tell my mum and dad so I took the cowards way out and told my mum on the phone! She actually didnt seem that shocked and she reminded me that I have been in a worse position before and have 'got through' it. She also told me not to stress about work, I have a feeling I am going to be put onto an attendance management thing anyway so hey whats one more week! Cant believe Im laughing about it but all of this stupid RA stuff has made me take stock of what is important in life.

I also phoned my RA nurse this morning and I am waiting on a call back from her. She was going to speak to my consultant to see if there is anything they can do.

Once again a big thank you for your kind words and making me realise that im not in fact wonder woman :roll: and I cant do it all alone

Linz xox

frogmorton

Well done Linz
You did well and got just the right kind of response from the lot of them
Maybe you can have some steroids for now i think that's ok for babies....?
Do let us know how you get on
Have a good weekend
Love
Toni x

countessheather

parky, your covered by the DISABILITY DISCRIMINATION ACT 1995/05 if you find that you are having problems at work Google `disability discrimination specailist employment solicestors' and you will have lots to choose from. The first session is free and if things become horrid, then it good to know that some one will fight your corner on `a no win, no fee basis' too.
With reguards to your predicament, give your Rhumy nurse a ring and tell her of the problems you are having. There's more than one way to skin a cat im sure!xx