hi

kingarthur
kingarthur Member Posts: 55
edited 6. Feb 2010, 12:06 in Say Hello Archive
Hello to everyone,
Well ive finally found a forum i would like to say hi to....

I have been suffering with Cerviacal spondylosis since i was 21...and over the years (despite doctors telling me it wouldnt) it has turned into Osteo arthritis (this is still unclear too) with a damaged nerve in my neck. Which causes spasms and clamps down on the nerve even harder, it can last up to 6 days and night where i am in pure agony.

I have also develope inflamed joints on my fingers just below the knuckles...which have stopped me pursuing my career so far.

I have high uric acid (that is all docs are prepared to tell me at the moment)...and i need to wait another two months for results from another 5 blood tests......

I lost everything because of my symptoms, My home and family, my job, and now im struggling by on a lousy £63 a week. And have faced ATOS who stopped my money then restarted it...For which i am grateful... (no money=no home, no food=panic attacks)

I am on
Gaberpentin (which has stopped my spasms)
MST slow release morphine,
and Sertraline for panic attacks

at night
Diazepam
Amitryptaline 2x 25mg
mst


Before al the above, i was a performer, teacher, worker, martial arts, surfer...and anything else i could cram into a day.

But now:
I've been in bed for 5-6 months feeling so down and tired...in pain..un able to get out of bed and walk properly....unable to face life/the world loss of confidence...a failure....facing people juding me, all i want to do is hide in this room away from the world....i dont think anyone would want to know me, i feel a failure. I wanted to never wake up, but every morning i do.

getting panic attacks at the Job centre when they tried to make me work........
I dont have friends...but i h ave a mum and step dad who are looking after me the best they can...Bless them.

And recently met a lady with ms who i love with all my heart....and life is looking brighter, ive opened my curtains todayy!

Just saying hi, and this is me sort of thing....i know its not a pleasant hello. But its me.....

love to you all

Comments

  • annie_mial
    annie_mial Member Posts: 5,818
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hello very much to you, King A! and welcome to our world

    I think you will find that you are not alone in any of this.........the basic causes may be given different names, but the consequences are much the same.

    I'm so glad that you are now looking for daylight and brighter days.......it is never easy, but the rewards are fantastic. Life may never be the same, but 'different' is often 'better' when you are able to look for the sunshine.

    Love and sunshine to both of you

    Annie
  • kingarthur
    kingarthur Member Posts: 55
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    annie_mial wrote:
    Hello very much to you, King A! and welcome to our world

    I think you will find that you are not alone in any of this.........the basic causes may be given different names, but the consequences are much the same.

    I'm so glad that you are now looking for daylight and brighter days.......it is never easy, but the rewards are fantastic. Life may never be the same, but 'different' is often 'better' when you are able to look for the sunshine.

    Love and sunshine to both of you

    Annie

    I thought i was alone, and now i am not! Wow
    Yes different i can now do...ive spent years in pain pretending to be normal...and it hasnt done me any good...So different and sunshine sounds Brilliant to me...

    Thankyou for your Special hello...

    Love and light to u
  • barbara12
    barbara12 Member Posts: 21,093
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Aw Arthur,
    You are not alone on this site. you can have a moan, and a good laugh, but best of all you will have all our support.
    Hope to see you post again soon
    Take care
    Bar bara xx
    Love
    Barbara
  • chile168
    chile168 Member Posts: 384
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi King A,

    Hey you posted in this forum and can say A BIG WELCOME :) even though we have already spoken in the Living With.... forum.

    Well done hun, you opened your curtains and glad life is beginning to look brighter. There's always light at the end of a tunnel and you seem to be getting there - so happy for you.

    Love to you and your lady xxxxxxx

    Eve
  • kingarthur
    kingarthur Member Posts: 55
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    chile168 wrote:
    Hi King A,

    Hey you posted in this forum and can say A BIG WELCOME :) even though we have already spoken in the Living With.... forum.

    Well done hun, you opened your curtains and glad life is beginning to look brighter. There's always light at the end of a tunnel and you seem to be getting there - so happy for you.

    Love to you and your lady xxxxxxx

    Eve

    Thankyou so much....Today has been a painful one.....yet ive stayed out of bed and kept going.....so whatever is happening must be good. And im so happy to find you guys, its so lonely out here. Too easy to think im the only one.... :roll: ....

    Light and love to you all
  • annie_mial
    annie_mial Member Posts: 5,818
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi King Al..........well done!

    Look on any of the other forums - including the Chit Chat one where you need to read between the lines sometimes.......you will find you are far from alone.

    Loosen up, let the light and love in.......don't tense up again and reject all that is being offered to you.........

    Love and sunshine
    Annie
  • trisher
    trisher Member Posts: 9,727
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi King Al

    A big welcome from me too.

    You are not alone anymore. We offer support to one another when needed.
    We also like to unwind and have a laugh as well.

    I hope to see you post soon.

    Trisher xx
  • valval
    valval Member Posts: 15,897
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    welcome it good to have you with us come on chit chat for natter and cup of t in cafe any time always people dropping in . we have a purple cow and kitten called cuddles lol all you need is an imagination and all the t and cakes you could ever want there for you. glad to have you with us you do not need to be on your own you have loads of new pals now. sorry arther got you but we will help all we can
    val
  • kingarthur
    kingarthur Member Posts: 55
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Thankyou people for your warm welcome,

    I had a cold, and then my neck decided it would join in...both muscels on either side of the spine went red hot...and lots of shooting pains.

    I had been reducing my Gaberpentin......and Doc says put it back up again :(....

    I keep hoping it will go all this pain and stuff.......maybe one day eh?

    It makes me feel worthless and useless as im now on sick as well....

    Glad ive found you people and i will try and make the most of this site.

    Im new to this forum thing, but i know its better than sitting in a dark room on my own :)

    Thankyou light and love to you all....
  • trisher
    trisher Member Posts: 9,727
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Kingarthur

    You are still in the Hello Thread.

    Why not come onto the Forums and post. You will find more peeps will see you.

    You should not feel worthless, I understand why but please don't feel that way.

    You have Arthritis, that is your problem, and that is not your fault.

    I would ask the doctor before cutting your Gaberpentin down as you may not be doing the right thing. The meds are given to you to help with the pain. They seem to be helping you, but if you cut them down the pain can come back again.

    Come and join us in the other Forums. It will help you feel better also help you know that you are not alone and most certainly not worthless.

    Trisher
  • bertyboy
    bertyboy Member Posts: 2,052
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    hi kingarthur
    welcome from me come along to the cafe for agood cupper and a nice cake or a butty of choice always a warm welcome xxxx
    I know i am a lady ,all life is a journey xx MAY xx
  • joyful164
    joyful164 Member Posts: 2,962
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hello Kingarthur.

    Well, it looks like you will finally kill that dragon with coming on to the Arthritis Care.
    As Trishia has said, you need some help with your medication before you decide to cut down on them. You need to see a dr or your rheumatolgist asap - get a referral to a pain clinic.
    I recently had all your back and neck problems and if it is wear and tear and trapped nerves then there are ways to help you improve .
    Pop over to the Living with Arthritis site and see how many other people suffer the same and I can tell you what I have done to help myself.

    Joy