Hello to everyone,
Well ive finally found a forum i would like to say hi to....
I have been suffering with Cerviacal spondylosis since i was 21...and over the years (despite doctors telling me it wouldnt) it has turned into Osteo arthritis (this is still unclear too) with a damaged nerve in my neck. Which causes spasms and clamps down on the nerve even harder, it can last up to 6 days and night where i am in pure agony.
I have also develope inflamed joints on my fingers just below the knuckles...which have stopped me pursuing my career so far.
I have high uric acid (that is all docs are prepared to tell me at the moment)...and i need to wait another two months for results from another 5 blood tests......
I lost everything because of my symptoms, My home and family, my job, and now im struggling by on a lousy £63 a week. And have faced ATOS who stopped my money then restarted it...For which i am grateful... (no money=no home, no food=panic attacks)
I am on
Gaberpentin (which has stopped my spasms)
MST slow release morphine,
and Sertraline for panic attacks
Amitryptaline 2x 25mg
Before al the above, i was a performer, teacher, worker, martial arts, surfer...and anything else i could cram into a day.
I've been in bed for 5-6 months feeling so down and tired...in pain..un able to get out of bed and walk properly....unable to face life/the world loss of confidence...a failure....facing people juding me, all i want to do is hide in this room away from the world....i dont think anyone would want to know me, i feel a failure. I wanted to never wake up, but every morning i do.
getting panic attacks at the Job centre when they tried to make me work........
I dont have friends...but i h ave a mum and step dad who are looking after me the best they can...Bless them.
And recently met a lady with ms who i love with all my heart....and life is looking brighter, ive opened my curtains todayy!
Just saying hi, and this is me sort of thing....i know its not a pleasant hello. But its me.....
love to you all