Am I being unreasonable but am so upset

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josiec
josiec Member Posts: 386
edited 21. Mar 2010, 16:54 in Living with Arthritis archive
Hi,
I don't know what to do - in a nutshell my family have told me they have a prior engagement on the evening of the day I go in hospital so won't be visiting. I am so upset by this and think they should alter their arrangements but am I just being selfish? I feel so abandoned :cry:

Comments

  • psyart
    psyart Member Posts: 600
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    dont know what to say but sending you hugs (((((((())))))))

    louise
    e050.gifo050.gif
  • valval
    valval Member Posts: 14,911
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    would you want them there if they did not want to be. ask a friend to come instead and have a good laugh to take your mind off things
    val
  • elnafinn
    elnafinn Member Posts: 7,412
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    Aw Josie,

    Please do not feel abandonned, cherub. You will probably be very sleepy after the op anyway so don't worry about not having any family visitors. I am sure they will call in to the nurses station to ask about you and you will be feeling more alert the following day when they do visit. You go ahead with the op, my lovely. You will not be abandonned in the hospital by the staff and that is the main thing. You will be ok. :D

    Do you know when your op will be, because visiting times go on for many hours so couldn't they call in earlier on in the evening or late afternoon before their prior engagement on that date?

    Love
    Elna x
    The happiest people don't have the best of everything. They just make the best of everything.

    If you can lay down at night knowing in your heart that you made someone's day just a little bit better, you know you had a good day.
  • skezier
    skezier Member Posts: 11,333
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    Hi Josie,

    I am sending you a ((( ))) and promise you if its the day of the op your more than likely to be sleeping it off so wont miss them too much. As to being unreasonable I think the idea of an op throws you out a bit so if you are it wouldn't be surprising. I think the could make a detour and pop in even if it was or a few mins though. You take care and hopefully it will sort out for you. Cris x
  • sharmaine
    sharmaine Member Posts: 1,638
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    Hi
    I'm sorry that you're so upset about your family not visiting on your first day in hospital. Have they made arrangements to visit you later on in the week? Is there anyone close to you that will visit - your partner or a close friend?

    I can understand why you are feeling so emotional - I was prior to my operation. Try and be strong and those that really care will be there for you.

    Lots of cyber hugs.

    Sharmaine
    X

    josiec wrote:
    Hi,
    I don't know what to do - in a nutshell my family have told me they have a prior engagement on the evening of the day I go in hospital so won't be visiting. I am so upset by this and think they should alter their arrangements but am I just being selfish? I feel so abandoned :cry:
  • 09angel11
    09angel11 Member Posts: 87
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    Hi Josiec

    Sorry to hear about your dilemma. Like others have said is there a friend or maybe a neighbour you get on with who may like to visit. If this appointment your family made before they knew you were going into hospital, i am sure they would change it if they could. Saying that , is your op the same day, or day after. Let us know the date of your op, and then we can all be there with you in spirit if not in body. Chin up your family will be thinking about you and will visit i am sure as soon as poss the next day.

    Joke to cheer you up. :D

    Doctor said to the patient as he left to go behind the curtain, "I would like to see you undressed to examine you" "Okay said the patient, what do you want me to take off"? "Nothing" said the doctor as he walked back in naked.


    Take care
    Lots of love
    Monica xx
    :):)
  • frogmorton
    frogmorton Member Posts: 30,424
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    Oh Josie :(

    You poor thing :(

    I would be really really upset too :(

    I wish i lived nearer then i would visit. I agree with the general concensus - see if a friend or someone can visit. Being in hospital can be incredibly lonely.

    You take care

    Love

    Toni xx
  • josiec
    josiec Member Posts: 386
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    Thanks for all you support (and the joke! :D ) I don't know if arrangements will change as they knew I was far from impressed (they are social by the way) I know I'll only be in one night but even so. (Monday 29th) Have been for pre-op today - slightly less reassured that they had the wrong foot down on some of the forms - will be checking paperwork on day, believe me!! :shock: Will see what happens. I can keep my phone on apparently which is good. J x
  • kerrycc
    kerrycc Member Posts: 89
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    Hey - i'd visit you if I could. Its hard to say anything constructive because truthfully, i'd be gutted too. I'm sure they would be there though if they could and at least they are there are there for you when you come out - I suppose some would have to go home to nothing so we should be thankful for that. Take care and try not to be too upset xx
  • woodbon
    woodbon Member Posts: 4,969
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    Hi,
    I'm so sorry, I'm sure that I'd feel the same as you do. I agree with the others about getting a friend, if possible.

    It may well be though, that you'll be so sleepy and out of things that you'll not notice!

    We'll be thinking of you, though! (((((((())))))))))
    Lots of love, Sue xx
  • josiec
    josiec Member Posts: 386
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    Hi. Still a week to go and my stomach's already in knots!! Have spoken to the family and my dad's going to come up to visit but not my mum. Improvement I suppose but still........ :cry: Ho hum. Hope you all okay
  • kerrycc
    kerrycc Member Posts: 89
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    At least someone will be there for you :D try not to let it get you down, you'll be out soon enough with people running around after you xx
  • valval
    valval Member Posts: 14,911
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    josiec wrote:
    Hi. Still a week to go and my stomach's already in knots!! Have spoken to the family and my dad's going to come up to visit but not my mum. Improvement I suppose but still........ :cry: Ho hum. Hope you all okay

    well if it was me would be my mum there bless her not my dad he does not do hospitals so would not be upset by it as know mum reports back and one person will be enough as you will feel nervos enough and not want to make idle chit chat
    val

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