'Why Me?' Days

sanmar63
sanmar63 Member Posts: 117
edited 29. Mar 2010, 05:26 in Living with Arthritis archive
Hi everyone,
Today I'm struggling with a 'Why me' day, - does anyone else have these, or am I just being a misery? :?: My fingers and toes resemble sausages at the mo, and although I've had RA since the age of 1 year (i'm now 47) - I've decided that I don't want it anymore!!
I'm well known for my silly sense of humour, but even thats not helping lately.
This is the first time that I've had someone to discuss RA with - I dont know anyone else of my age that knows the pain that it causes, but I would love to know if there's anyone on the forum that has 'Why me' days, and how they get through them!
Sorry if I sound miserable, I'm not usually - honest! :oops:
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Comments

  • issymknight
    issymknight Member Posts: 99
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    I have these days to and I bet the majority of people on this forum have why me days also, so you are not alone.
    Secondly your allowed to be a misery if you want in fact you can be whatever mood takes your fancy. I have a range of moods some very nice and some just plain horrible.
    When I have a why me day I tend to try and watch my favourite dvds like National Security, shawshank Redemption Colour Purple for some reason these 3 films seem to lift my mood. So you try watching one of your fav dvds like I do or read a book or treat yourself to something then you can think I won another day.

    Hope you feel bit better soon. Just think tomorrow is another day.

    Issy
  • frogmorton
    frogmorton Member Posts: 29,881
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Sandra

    good to see you posting.

    You know what?? I don't want it anymore either :wink:

    You have evry right to feel miserable at times - I think we all do and so - just for a bit - wallow in a bit od self-pity :wink:

    Tomorrow's another and hopefully better day :)

    Oh yes and never worry about maoning on here we all do and we all drag each other up again too

    Love

    Toni xx
  • sanmar63
    sanmar63 Member Posts: 117
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Sanmar
    Sorry to hear you are feeling so bad at the moment. I can't begin to imagine what it's been like for you, having RA all this time. I was only diagnosed last year!!!!

    It's great that you've managed to keep your sense of humour - it does help, doesn't it? But I think everyone here does (and is entitled to) have days when you just want to scream and shout, or crawl under the duvet, and not come out for a week!!!! :shock: I've certainly had my fair share of those days. But I know that just "venting", and writing it all down here, is a huge help (I speak from experience)!! Just knowing that other peeps here understand how you feel, can be the starting point for climbing out of that black hole.

    Ah, the sausage fingers and toes - a very attractive feature, don't you think? :roll: :roll: But bloomin' painful!! I'm sorry, I don't know if your meds have things under control at the moment - is this a flare you're having just now? You probably know all the tips and tricks for helping (ice packs, wheatbags, etc)??? I don't think I can offer much practical help really - just a cyber shoulder to lean on, a hand to hold, and a bucketful of hugs (((((((()))))))), to help you get through the day.

    I hope you end the day feeling much, much better than you do right now. Keep posting, and let us know how you are?

    Take care, and some more ((((((((((()))))))))),
    love from Lynn xxxxxx

    Hi Lynn, thanks so much for your message, At the moment I'm in a flare up, but upto now its been going for 3 months. I've got ANOTHER appt with Consultant tomorrow - (but my RA is older than him) so I'm not holding my breath! lol!
    I had a large Steroid jab 3 weeks ago - but it did nothing at all, so I dont know what he'll decide tomorrow, I'll let you know.
    Thanks for all the hugs, I appreciate it, but please, no hand holding - its too bloody painful!!! lol x :shock:
    Its lovely to talk to someone in a similar situation to me, take care, Sandra xxx
  • barbara12
    barbara12 Member Posts: 21,281
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Sanmar
    You moan all you want, we all have why me days, and it does you good to get it off your chest
    I have only been diagnosed for a few years with OA, and I have lots of days trying to come to terms with it.
    I find now that when I manage to do things that I thought I couldn't do, I am really proud of myself and it lift me again.
    Dont forget we are always here for one another.
    You take care
    Barbara xx
    Love
    Barbara
  • sanmar63
    sanmar63 Member Posts: 117
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    I have these days to and I bet the majority of people on this forum have why me days also, so you are not alone.
    Secondly your allowed to be a misery if you want in fact you can be whatever mood takes your fancy. I have a range of moods some very nice and some just plain horrible.
    When I have a why me day I tend to try and watch my favourite dvds like National Security, shawshank Redemption Colour Purple for some reason these 3 films seem to lift my mood. So you try watching one of your fav dvds like I do or read a book or treat yourself to something then you can think I won another day.

    Hope you feel bit better soon. Just think tomorrow is another day.

    Issy

    Hi Issy, I'm beginning to wonder why I've never joined this forum before, I cant believe there are so many nice people on here :)
    I feel better about things just knowing that I'm not alone in my struggles. Thankyou!!! Sandra xxx
  • sanmar63
    sanmar63 Member Posts: 117
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    frogmorton wrote:
    Hi Sandra

    good to see you posting.

    You know what?? I don't want it anymore either :wink:

    You have evry right to feel miserable at times - I think we all do and so - just for a bit - wallow in a bit od self-pity :wink:

    Tomorrow's another and hopefully better day :)

    Oh yes and never worry about maoning on here we all do and we all drag each other up again too

    Love

    Toni xx

    Hi Toni, Its great to know that i can chat to someone who knows how i'm feeling. My family is wonderful - but they really have no idea what sort of pain i have, they just know that if Mum's gaunt, she hurts more than usual (odd i know, but thats how they gauge it) seeing Consultant tomorrow - I'll let you all know what happens, Sandra xxx
  • sanmar63
    sanmar63 Member Posts: 117
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    barbara12 wrote:
    Hi Sanmar
    You moan all you want, we all have why me days, and it does you good to get it off your chest
    I have only been diagnosed for a few years with OA, and I have lots of days trying to come to terms with it.
    I find now that when I manage to do things that I thought I couldn't do, I am really proud of myself and it lift me again.
    Dont forget we are always here for one another.
    You take care
    Barbara xx

    Hi Barbara, I'm sorry to hear of your OA, I think that, in a way, I'm lucky - I dont remember a time when I didn't have RA - so its always been there and i dont have anything to compare it with!
    You have every right to be proud of yourself when you manage to do something you though was impossible - I'm the same!! :lol: I'm so glad that I've joined this forum and I'm looking forward to staying in touch with everyone, speak to you very soon, Sandra xxx
  • frogmorton
    frogmorton Member Posts: 29,881
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Sandra

    So glad you see the consultant tomorrow - makes a change!! Whenever I go it's when I'm well!

    At least he/she will see it as it is.

    Nice to be able to give the family abreak from our moanig isn't it?

    Love

    Toni xx
  • shockingpink
    shockingpink Member Posts: 8
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    I have "why me?" days occasionally; at the moment I'm going through a why me month! Good luck with the consultant visit - I can't remember the last time I saw mine! I'm new to this forum too, and can't believe I didn't find it before - everyone is so friendly and hepful. It's great to speak to people who really understand, isn't it?
    Llook after yourself x
  • barbara12
    barbara12 Member Posts: 21,281
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    sanmar63 wrote:
    barbara12 wrote:
    Hi Sanmar
    You moan all you want, we all have why me days, and it does you good to get it off your chest
    I have only been diagnosed for a few years with OA, and I have lots of days trying to come to terms with it.
    I find now that when I manage to do things that I thought I couldn't do, I am really proud of myself and it lift me again.
    Dont forget we are always here for one another.
    You take care
    Barbara xx

    Hi Barbara, I'm sorry to hear of your OA, I think that, in a way, I'm lucky - I dont remember a time when I didn't have RA - so its always been there and i dont have anything to compare it with!
    You have every right to be proud of yourself when you manage to do something you though was impossible - I'm the same!! :lol: I'm so glad that I've joined this forum and I'm looking forward to staying in touch with everyone, speak to you very soon, Sandra xxx
    Hi again Sanmar you make me feel so humble, you are really a fighter, and dont you ever forget that.
    Love
    Barbara xx
    Love
    Barbara
  • maria09
    maria09 Member Posts: 1,905
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    We need a why me club so when days are really bad we can let off steam because I know there are days when I dont want to let my family know how bad im feeling & on here we all know how bad it can get so heres to the Why Me club
    Love Maria x
  • cutieclaire
    cutieclaire Member Posts: 134
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    I am feeling like this today 2. It weird. I am a bit angry and frustrated about having this. Trying to loose weight and not being able to get up and go like I used to.

    I hate having this and get so annoyed with it. I am only 33 and want my life back again.

    I feel better just writing this and seeing others have these days 2 as its not always this way.

    Thank you so much for letting me moan and just be open with how I am feeling. Thank you.

    xxxxxx Love Claire
    xxxxx
  • kerrycc
    kerrycc Member Posts: 89
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    sanmar63 wrote:
    Hi Sanmar
    Sorry to hear you are feeling so bad at the moment. I can't begin to imagine what it's been like for you, having RA all this time. I was only diagnosed last year!!!!

    It's great that you've managed to keep your sense of humour - it does help, doesn't it? But I think everyone here does (and is entitled to) have days when you just want to scream and shout, or crawl under the duvet, and not come out for a week!!!! :shock: I've certainly had my fair share of those days. But I know that just "venting", and writing it all down here, is a huge help (I speak from experience)!! Just knowing that other peeps here understand how you feel, can be the starting point for climbing out of that black hole.

    Ah, the sausage fingers and toes - a very attractive feature, don't you think? :roll: :roll: But bloomin' painful!! I'm sorry, I don't know if your meds have things under control at the moment - is this a flare you're having just now? You probably know all the tips and tricks for helping (ice packs, wheatbags, etc)??? I don't think I can offer much practical help really - just a cyber shoulder to lean on, a hand to hold, and a bucketful of hugs (((((((()))))))), to help you get through the day.

    I hope you end the day feeling much, much better than you do right now. Keep posting, and let us know how you are?

    Take care, and some more ((((((((((()))))))))),
    love from Lynn xxxxxx

    Hi Lynn, thanks so much for your message, At the moment I'm in a flare up, but upto now its been going for 3 months. I've got ANOTHER appt with Consultant tomorrow - (but my RA is older than him) so I'm not holding my breath! lol!
    I had a large Steroid jab 3 weeks ago - but it did nothing at all, so I dont know what he'll decide tomorrow, I'll let you know.
    Thanks for all the hugs, I appreciate it, but please, no hand holding - its too bloody painful!!! lol x :shock:
    Its lovely to talk to someone in a similar situation to me, take care, Sandra xxx

    I cant quite believe you are saying that you have been having this for 3 months - so have i!! I thought that there must be something else wrong with me - I too am usually the happy go lucky type and just cant shake this feeling latley! Is it normal for it to last so long? xx
  • dorcas
    dorcas Member Posts: 3,516
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi sanmar,

    nice to meet you :D

    I hope tomorrow your rheummy will listen to how you are feeling and be able to get arther back under control. (even if he does look as though he is just out of school ha ha!!)

    The 'why me days' get us all from time to time and the forum is the perfect place to talk freely with each other, without feeling guilty or having to hide just how bad we feel....

    I would find it hard to imagine now not having the forum!

    will keep my fingers and toes crossed for you for tomorrow.....let us know how it goes. Iris x
  • sanmar63
    sanmar63 Member Posts: 117
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    maria09 wrote:
    We need a why me club so when days are really bad we can let off steam because I know there are days when I dont want to let my family know how bad im feeling & on here we all know how bad it can get so heres to the Why Me club
    Love Maria x

    Hi Maria, what a great idea!!!
    I'll join! lol :D:D:D
  • sanmar63
    sanmar63 Member Posts: 117
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    kerrycc wrote:
    sanmar63 wrote:
    Hi Sanmar
    Sorry to hear you are feeling so bad at the moment. I can't begin to imagine what it's been like for you, having RA all this time. I was only diagnosed last year!!!!

    It's great that you've managed to keep your sense of humour - it does help, doesn't it? But I think everyone here does (and is entitled to) have days when you just want to scream and shout, or crawl under the duvet, and not come out for a week!!!! :shock: I've certainly had my fair share of those days. But I know that just "venting", and writing it all down here, is a huge help (I speak from experience)!! Just knowing that other peeps here understand how you feel, can be the starting point for climbing out of that black hole.

    Ah, the sausage fingers and toes - a very attractive feature, don't you think? :roll: :roll: But bloomin' painful!! I'm sorry, I don't know if your meds have things under control at the moment - is this a flare you're having just now? You probably know all the tips and tricks for helping (ice packs, wheatbags, etc)??? I don't think I can offer much practical help really - just a cyber shoulder to lean on, a hand to hold, and a bucketful of hugs (((((((()))))))), to help you get through the day.

    I hope you end the day feeling much, much better than you do right now. Keep posting, and let us know how you are?

    Take care, and some more ((((((((((()))))))))),
    love from Lynn xxxxxx

    Hi Lynn, thanks so much for your message, At the moment I'm in a flare up, but upto now its been going for 3 months. I've got ANOTHER appt with Consultant tomorrow - (but my RA is older than him) so I'm not holding my breath! lol!
    I had a large Steroid jab 3 weeks ago - but it did nothing at all, so I dont know what he'll decide tomorrow, I'll let you know.
    Thanks for all the hugs, I appreciate it, but please, no hand holding - its too bloody painful!!! lol x :shock:
    Its lovely to talk to someone in a similar situation to me, take care, Sandra xxx

    I cant quite believe you are saying that you have been having this for 3 months - so have i!! I thought that there must be something else wrong with me - I too am usually the happy go lucky type and just cant shake this feeling latley! Is it normal for it to last so long? xx

    Hi! I have to admit, although I've had RA for 46 years, I dont remember a flare up lasting this long before. Mine started on Christmas Eve - I couldn't open my pressies next day! :cry:
    Maybe its the bad weather, I dunno. All I know is that I'm fed up now and I cant seem to get myself sorted!
    Maybe my wonderful (but very young) Consultant can have another go, we'll see, Take care, Sandra xxx
  • maria09
    maria09 Member Posts: 1,905
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi
    Im having a Why Me morning :(
    Cant get to sleep too many aches! :!:
    Blasted damp weather :x
    To make matters worse its all quiet in the household everyones asleep even the cat! She wasnt too happy when i tried to wake her :!:
    Hope everyones managing to get some sleep
    Take care Maria x
  • cutieclaire
    cutieclaire Member Posts: 134
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hello,

    I was wondering how your appointment went hun. Hope it went ok. Take care

    Love Claire
    xxxxx
  • sanmar63
    sanmar63 Member Posts: 117
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Sandra

    If you're reading this, just wondered how you got on with your consultant - hope he didn't have to leave early for his afternoon nap :wink::wink:

    I hope it went well, and when you're up to posting, let us know how you're doing.(or you can just tell me to mind my own business)!! :shock: :D:D Hope you're feeling much better today.

    Love from Lynn xxx

    Hi Lynn, it went quite well yesterday, had injections in both shoulder joints (oh the blessed relief today) and had x rays on my hands, feet and chest as he now wants me to take Methotrexate. Have you ever taken it? I've been reading up, but I'm unsure about all the side-effects.
    Anyway, I do feel much better today (even managed some ironing earlier) tho I'm now resting cos I'm worn out!! lol
    I wouldn't tell you to mind your own business - thankyou for caring enough to ask how i am!
    Love, Sandra xxx
  • sanmar63
    sanmar63 Member Posts: 117
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    maria09 wrote:
    Hi
    Im having a Why Me morning :(
    Cant get to sleep too many aches! :!:
    Blasted damp weather :x
    To make matters worse its all quiet in the household everyones asleep even the cat! She wasnt too happy when i tried to wake her :!:
    Hope everyones managing to get some sleep
    Take care Maria x

    Bless you xx
  • sanmar63
    sanmar63 Member Posts: 117
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hello,

    I was wondering how your appointment went hun. Hope it went ok. Take care

    Love Claire
    xxxxx

    Hi Claire, it went well yesterday, injections in both shoulder joints (thank goodness) and had loads of x rays in preparation for taking Methotrexate - tho I'm still not sure whether i will yet.
    Hope youre ok,
    Love, Sandra xxx
  • cutieclaire
    cutieclaire Member Posts: 134
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Sandra,

    So glad you are ok and things went ok. Hope your pain is getting better now you have had injections. I am ok. I have been put on a course of Steriods, which is working I tell you!!!! Thank God. I think if it didnt I would of wanted to crawl into a ball and just cry as I was in so much pain, like lots of people on here.

    Well lets hope you get seen really soon and the xrays have some clearer info for you.

    Take care and chat soon

    Love Claire
    xxxxx

    sanmar63 wrote:
    Hello,

    I was wondering how your appointment went hun. Hope it went ok. Take care

    Love Claire
    xxxxx

    Hi Claire, it went well yesterday, injections in both shoulder joints (thank goodness) and had loads of x rays in preparation for taking Methotrexate - tho I'm still not sure whether i will yet.
    Hope youre ok,
    Love, Sandra xxx
  • woodbon
    woodbon Member Posts: 4,969
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hello,
    I think we all have 'Why me?' days. You've had a lot to put up with and it must be hard, but keeping your sense of humour can help you out of lots of situations. I know it does me. When I was at work, as a care assistant, their were often times when the only thing to do was laugh, if visitors had heard, they would have thought us uncaring, but its just the opposite, those who could laugh at weird and unpleasant situations were the ones that coped best! Others would loose their cool and end up walking out.

    Anyway, I'm rambling on a bit, I do miss my job! I hope tomorrow is a better day for you. :wink:
    Love Sue
  • maria09
    maria09 Member Posts: 1,905
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Sandra
    Hope you are feeling a little better
    Just popped in to see if you are ok
    Love Maria x
  • sanmar63
    sanmar63 Member Posts: 117
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    woodbon wrote:
    Hello,
    I think we all have 'Why me?' days. You've had a lot to put up with and it must be hard, but keeping your sense of humour can help you out of lots of situations. I know it does me. When I was at work, as a care assistant, their were often times when the only thing to do was laugh, if visitors had heard, they would have thought us uncaring, but its just the opposite, those who could laugh at weird and unpleasant situations were the ones that coped best! Others would loose their cool and end up walking out.

    Anyway, I'm rambling on a bit, I do miss my job! I hope tomorrow is a better day for you. :wink:
    Love Sue

    Hi Sue,
    My brilliant GP once told me 'It hits the strongest people the hardest' :shock:

    I have to admit, people that dont know me well, tend to think that I'm a total loony because I can laugh at things that they dont find funny. But hey, that's their loss!!! :lol::lol::lol::lol::lol:

    Love, Sandra xxx