temper

lucymum
lucymum Member Posts: 113
edited 31. Mar 2010, 19:16 in My child has arthritis
Ok now Lucy has always been her own person, having a very big personality, but things are getting worse!! She has begun to lash out at her sister, who helps her alot with stuff she can not do, when she is very sore or weak.
We have tried being harsh about it, tried taking an understanding tone, but nothing seems to work. Once the red mist desends she is a nasty child who hits her little sis. Has anyone any idears or advice who could help us as a family rain her in a bit!

I know how hard it is being in pain, as i am and have been since the age of 11, but i never acted out as she is!!

Help anyone please!!

Comments

  • elnafinn
    elnafinn Member Posts: 7,412
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi there

    I am sorry that along with everything else Lucy is showing her anger big time. Is she only showing this temper at home or does it happen at school and other places outside the home?
    She is probably jealous/angry of her younger sister who is able to do things for her that she cannot do, when she is unwell, although she is older. Have you tried talking to her about her outbursts when she is calm? Could it be explained to her that we are all allowed to be angry but some ways of showing it are acceptable and others not. You could sit with her and perhaps discuss with her what is acceptable and what not. Ask her to describe how her body feels when she becomes very angry. Does it feel like she has an erupting volcano in her tummy when she feels very angry?

    I hope you are able to reign her in a little. Would anger management help her? I presume you can be referred via the gp if it was thought it could do some good.

    You must look after yourself too and try to stay calm - difficult I know.

    Luv
    Elna x
    The happiest people don't have the best of everything. They just make the best of everything.

    If you can lay down at night knowing in your heart that you made someone's day just a little bit better, you know you had a good day.
  • illihor
    illihor Member Posts: 283
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hugs I know what you mean Kayltigh is the same. Is she on mtx? Kayleigh has gotten worse now taken that and if I try and drop ibuprofen omg witch allert. I tend to notice it more when she starts to hurt after a good spell :(

    I hope you can find out why she plays up and find a way to snap her out of it I'm still struggling now but it's starting to get easier.

    Michelle xxx
  • steph120786
    steph120786 Member Posts: 66
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Kaitlin is the same absoulte nightmare, like you said michelle even worse withdrawing ibruprofen, and again when she in pain I think its the frustration of not being able to say how they feel so express it in anger.

    I rang consultant last month cos for a whole week none stop she did every thing she shouldnt, bet he thought i was a right weirdo but i wanted some explaination why she was behaving like this.

    I do hope that the girls, learn to deal with this without lashing out..
    hope all well, take care xx
  • speedalong
    speedalong Member Posts: 3,315
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Poor Lucy and all of you. I do know that when my pain is worse I feel more irritable and less tolerant.

    What ways does Lucy have to express her frustration/anger? (How old is she?) Diary/role play/pounding play dough etc

    Perhaps when she is having a less painful day, you could discuss this all with her. Tell her how you all find it hard seeing her in pain, that her sister is only trying to help her, has feelings too etc etc Perhaps you could all agree a way for her to express she is having an extra bad day/needs to be left alone etc

    Speedalong
    I have had OA since mid twenties. It affects my hips and knees. I had a THR on the left aged 30 and now have a resurface-replacement on the right - done May 2010.
  • speedalong
    speedalong Member Posts: 3,315
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Poor Lucy and all of you. I do know that when my pain is worse I feel more irritable and less tolerant.

    What ways does Lucy have to express her frustration/anger? (How old is she?) Diary/role play/pounding play dough etc

    Perhaps when she is having a less painful day, you could discuss this all with her. Tell her how you all find it hard seeing her in pain, that her sister is only trying to help her, has feelings too etc etc Perhaps you could all agree a way for her to express she is having an extra bad day/needs to be left alone etc

    Speedalong
    I have had OA since mid twenties. It affects my hips and knees. I had a THR on the left aged 30 and now have a resurface-replacement on the right - done May 2010.