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24 & newly diagnosed

polly1985polly1985 Member Posts: 70
edited 16. May 2010, 09:22 in Young people's community
hey pretty new 2 site. only bn told couple wk ago i have arthritis in spine after many years, many dr's, many physios etc etc. waitin on rhematology apt as new gp thinks i have RA in knee's and feet.

any advice on how 2 cope with doin things i want 2 do with my pals who dont have arthritis?? findin a lot o things hard, either at the time or the next day. its so frustrating!! i feel bout 80 compared 2 my pals!!

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  • speedalongspeedalong Member Posts: 3,347
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    polly1985 wrote:
    hey pretty new 2 site. only bn told couple wk ago i have arthritis in spine after many years, many dr's, many physios etc etc. waitin on rhematology apt as new gp thinks i have RA in knee's and feet.

    any advice on how 2 cope with doin things i want 2 do with my pals who dont have arthritis?? findin a lot o things hard, either at the time or the next day. its so frustrating!! i feel bout 80 compared 2 my pals!!

    Hi Polly,

    Once you have seen rhuemy and got meds sorted that will help.

    You will gradually make adjustments to your life to help you manage better ... Pacing yourself is important. Save energy where you can. If you were like me you need to change your thinking a bit. Ie I used to walk everywhere ... I learnt to use transport more so could walk at destination more. I used to use stairs to be fit!! Now use lifts and elevators. When shopping/at museums etc schedule in coffee stops in cafes. Make sure your friends are aware - they can easily carry your bags for eg and it means you can walk further. I budget my painkillers around my social life/committments.

    Speedalong

    PS have you downloaded info from publications and resources section of website - very helpful.
    I have had OA since mid twenties. It affects my hips and knees. I had a THR on the left aged 30 and now have a resurface-replacement on the right - done May 2010.
  • cthornleycthornley Member Posts: 627
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    polly1985 wrote:
    hey pretty new 2 site. only bn told couple wk ago i have arthritis in spine after many years, many dr's, many physios etc etc. waitin on rhematology apt as new gp thinks i have RA in knee's and feet.

    any advice on how 2 cope with doin things i want 2 do with my pals who dont have arthritis?? findin a lot o things hard, either at the time or the next day. its so frustrating!! i feel bout 80 compared 2 my pals!!

    Hi & welcome
    I know what you mean about feeling 80 :?
    I was diagnosed with RA at 19 right after starting uni, which funnily enough seemed like the worst ever timing, everybody else wanted to go clubbing & having fun and so did I but there was no chance if ever keeping up at that point.
    Its a bit of a learning curve, pacing yourself and after over 10 yrs I still don't always get it right but I am getting better at it.
    Prioritise what you want to do
    Try to do things but think about doing them for a little bit less time...when you do this try to treat yourself so it doesn't feel like your missing out it, gives you incentive then
    try to go out to places that have a seat and learn to be bossy about getting one
    I'm sure there are lots of other things but I hope that gets you started
    Chrissie
  • louiserichardlouiserichard Member Posts: 52
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Polly

    I know what you mean - it can be very hard and I know it sounds strange but you learn how to manage it and will soon know what you can do and how far you can push yourself etc.

    I'm in my 20s too. Its hard for friends to understand that one day you may be fine the next day you arent etc. I used to hide away on 'bad' days but found it actually helped my friends understand to see me when I was like that so that they could understand better.

    With the rights meds you can control your arthritis well so that you can lead a more normal life. I have arthritis in all my joints (apart from my hips as i've had them replaced) however due to good meds I manage to work full time and a lot of people don't know there is anything wrong with me.

    On a bad day I say to my man that when he's 80 he will understand how I feel hehe.

    I know its hard, but keep strong.

    Louise x
  • polly1985polly1985 Member Posts: 70
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    thank u for ur replys. i have had pain for years and friends know im in pain but i always say never mind they will find out soon what is wrong and fix it. as this is not the case now and things are a lot worse to what they were even a year ago certain "friends" have lost there understanding. they only bother when they need something or have nothing better 2 do. i am starting to find out who my real friends are. like the one's who have known me from when this 1st started (not all of them either actually) and there are a few who ive only recently became friends with but are so nice and so understanding and will help me when i need it.

    it just gets to me that people who i called friends now dont want 2 bother with me like i have some contagious disease.

    actually i think im feelin a little emotional jus now as i am in a lot of pain, so mayb things will look better once that has eased. got rheummy on 27th fingers crossed i get something 2 help im at my wits end now.

    thank u again 4 ur replies and advice, i will take on board these things

    xxx
  • sarahrockfansarahrockfan Member Posts: 79
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Polly,
    Unfortunately I think practically everyone on here has had some so called "friends" (and even family members) that cant be bothered with them ( I know I have) but at this particular time it does show who your real friends are and that you can rely on them even though they may not fully understand the pain that you're in or you find it difficult doing certain things.
    We're all friends on here so whenever you need a chat or moan you know where to come :D .
    TC
    Sarah
    polly1985 wrote:
    thank u for ur replys. i have had pain for years and friends know im in pain but i always say never mind they will find out soon what is wrong and fix it. as this is not the case now and things are a lot worse to what they were even a year ago certain "friends" have lost there understanding. they only bother when they need something or have nothing better 2 do. i am starting to find out who my real friends are. like the one's who have known me from when this 1st started (not all of them either actually) and there are a few who ive only recently became friends with but are so nice and so understanding and will help me when i need it.

    it just gets to me that people who i called friends now dont want 2 bother with me like i have some contagious disease.

    actually i think im feelin a little emotional jus now as i am in a lot of pain, so mayb things will look better once that has eased. got rheummy on 27th fingers crossed i get something 2 help im at my wits end now.

    thank u again 4 ur replies and advice, i will take on board these things

    xxx
  • polly1985polly1985 Member Posts: 70
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    thanks sarah, just fed up of them all now haha one of them was slagging me off at work and is now trying to tell me she was not. funnily enough it is sat and she wants to go out. even if i had the energy and no pain i dont think i would be going out. im only sticking with my friends who have stuck by me.
    thanks again
  • sarahrockfansarahrockfan Member Posts: 79
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    I don't blame you hun, stick with the good ones :D
    polly1985 wrote:
    thanks sarah, just fed up of them all now haha one of them was slagging me off at work and is now trying to tell me she was not. funnily enough it is sat and she wants to go out. even if i had the energy and no pain i dont think i would be going out. im only sticking with my friends who have stuck by me.
    thanks again
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