Two public schoolboys

joanlawson

Nick Clegg ‘delighted’ with new fagging portfolio

It's all going terribly well. Deputy Prime Minister Nick Clegg has said that he is ‘honoured’ by his new appointment as personal **** to David Cameron. Under the arrangement, Mr Clegg will perform household chores for the Prime Minister including pressing his trousers, polishing his shoes and warming his toilet seat. In return, Mr Cameron will protect Clegg from being bullied by other members of Cabinet.

‘Of course Clegg is not a full boarder,’ said Cameron, ‘he’s a day boy. But rest assured, we will treat him with the respect that he deserves.’

‘This is a unique opportunity,’ said Clegg, ‘For some people, running around and opening doors for your fagmaster might seem demeaning. But for me, this is a price that I have to pay. That, and my lunch money.’

David Cameron denied allegations that some Liberal Democrats were already being bullied. ‘This is all part of the rough and tumble of government,’ said Cameron, ‘I am sure that the new boys will soon get used to this horseplay and find their rightful place in the pecking order, at the bottom.’

Meanwhile, it is understood that Vince Cable will be expected to wear a pinny and serve tea to Chancellor, George Osborne. ‘This isn’t exactly what I had signed up for,’ said Mr Cable, ‘and it may take a little while getting used to my new ministerial title as ‘Scullion’.’

When asked whether he had sold out to the Prime Minister, Clegg replied, ‘I have made his bed, and I will lie in it.’

dreamdaisy

Methinks that Rory Bremner has a new script writer! DD

frogmorton

dreamdaisy wrote:

Methinks that Rory Bremner has a new script writer! DD

:shock: :shock:
indeed, DaisyD, indeed....

Toni xx

janie68

Really enjoyed that, so true don't you think? Yes Rory will be having a field day with all this new material won't he?

Janie