Anyone like me?

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biddybeth
biddybeth Member Posts: 45
edited 16. Jun 2010, 15:56 in Community Chit-chat archive
Around ten years ago I had my left hip replaced, and three weeks later, my right one. I recovered very quickly, and felt I had my life back again. Then, around five years ago, my shoulders became painful, especially the left one, and I was referred to a Consultant Rheumatologist. I was marked down for further surgery, and, although I have always refused to have anything to do with steroids, this Consultant became quite bullying and insisted I had an injection. He injected into my left hip, and I left in tears. A few months later I developed an abcess in that area, and had it removed in hospital. The next couple of years were spent having dressings changed daily and I was on high dose antibiotics. Eventually, because the wound would not heal, I had an operation to remove my left false hip. Unfortunately, the surgeon had difficulty removing it and shattered my femur in the process. I had to lay on my back for 6 weeks, on full strength antibiotics, and because I was in so much pain, large doses of morphine. A new false hip was fitted after this time, and also a false femur. I don't think I was expected to walk again, but I did, and now I get around as best I can with my walking stick. Needless to say, I did not go ahead with the shoulder op and I live my life as best I can, with the help of strong antiinflammatory and painkiller tablets. I have no more confidence in having further treatment for my RA. I rely on my husband to help me and bless him, he does. We laugh a lot and because I can't walk far, we go out in our car for drives. I don't let myself think ahead, I just take one day at a time. The RA has now gone to my spine, and I have good days and bad days. just wondered if anyone else hhas had their femur broken and how they manage.

Comments

  • annie_mial
    annie_mial Member Posts: 5,614
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    OMG, you have gone through it! I can't add anything, but wanted to give you my welcome to the forums!

    I'm one of the luckier ones, 65 now, but still have relative mobility (except on bad days) because I developed it late. My first brush with arthur was 10/12 years ago when I got polymyalgia rheumatica (still got it now) which left me unable to walk or function for a while (couldn't even brush my hair). That's when I got my love/hate relationship with steroids, they gave me my life back at the time, but have stolen it again since then!

    You sound like a fighting gal, so join the club!

    Annie
  • trisher
    trisher Member Posts: 9,263
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Hi Biddybeth,

    Wow, what a lot you have been through. I do not blame not wanting anything else done.

    I know what it is like to have to have hubby to help. I'm glad you are also like me and are able to laugh with him too.

    I rely on hubby for so much, I'm confined to a wheelchair with my hubby as a full time carer. We do laugh a lot. Had a lot of surgery as well.

    Then arthur came and visited and decided to stay.

    I wish you well and hope you can have many more laughs with hubby

    Sending some ((((())))
    Love Trish xxxxxx
  • biddybeth
    biddybeth Member Posts: 45
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    annie_mial wrote:
    OMG, you have gone through it! I can't add anything, but wanted to give you my welcome to the forums!

    I'm one of the luckier ones, 65 now, but still have relative mobility (except on bad days) because I developed it late. My first brush with arthur was 10/12 years ago when I got polymyalgia rheumatica (still got it now) which left me unable to walk or function for a while (couldn't even brush my hair). That's when I got my love/hate relationship with steroids, they gave me my life back at the time, but have stolen it again since then!

    You sound like a fighting gal, so join the club!

    Annie

    Hi Annie, Great to hear from you. Sorry I sounded so bitter. I have had RA since I was eight, 'tho I was in remission for a good number of years, thank God. Everyone is so lovely on this website, I'm so glad I found it. Take care, Beth x
  • biddybeth
    biddybeth Member Posts: 45
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    trisher wrote:
    Hi Biddybeth,

    Wow, what a lot you have been through. I do not blame not wanting anything else done.

    I know what it is like to have to have hubby to help. I'm glad you are also like me and are able to laugh with him too.

    I rely on hubby for so much, I'm confined to a wheelchair with my hubby as a full time carer. We do laugh a lot. Had a lot of surgery as well.

    Then arthur came and visited and decided to stay.

    I wish you well and hope you can have many more laughs with hubby

    Sending some ((((())))
    Love Trish xxxxxx

    Hi Trish, How lovely of you to reply. Didn't mean to moan, just sometimes life seems unfair. My husband would give me a kick up the backside if he had read that note. Quite rightly!!!. Take care, Love, Beth x
  • annie_mial
    annie_mial Member Posts: 5,614
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Beth, you didn't come across as bitter to me - you were just stating facts.

    I know what you mean, though.....my hubby would have glared at me if he could see some of the moaning I've done!

    Annie
  • snowball
    snowball Member Posts: 3,465
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Hi Beth and welcome to the forum, they are a great friendly bunch on here. You have been through so much I have nothing but admiration for you. I have r/a too was diagnosed 5 years ago.
    Look forward to your post.

    Julie x
    ((((hugs)))) n xxxxx to ya all
  • dreamdaisy
    dreamdaisy Member Posts: 31,520
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Now now, biddybeth, a good moan is very therapeutic. It gets rid of a great deal of tension and you certainly have something to moan about. It is too difficult (I think) to unload to family: they're with you all the time, they know the problems and sometimes they feel so helpless it just adds more stress when it's least needed. That's where we come in. We don't mind moans. We listen to them (read them?) and understand how important it is to let all the rubbish go. It has to be vented otherwise it festers. And rots. And decays. And makes things far worse.

    You have had to deal with a huge amount in your lifetime, and I am sure you have done it, for the most part, with grace and equanimity. You don't have to be like that with us - we want to see your inner daemons! We'll sort them out for you - little sods, making you unhappy. Make sure, however, that you talk to us on the good days too - we like to hear some happy stuff from time-to-time! I sincerely wish you well, keep in touch. Dreamdaisy
    Have you got the despatches? No, I always walk like this. Eddie Braben
  • elnafinn
    elnafinn Member Posts: 7,412
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Dear Biddybeth

    I am so very sorry to read your story. My mum went in for a total knee replacement and the consultant managed to break her femur. Post op in the hospital the physios came along and asked her to stand and she cried out in pain, this happened for 3 days and on the last day she nearly fell but grasped the bed just in time.I remember her phoning me so unhappy with the situation. It was then thought an xray was in order. :roll: That is when it was found that her femur was broken. She went to surgery again and had it "repaired" and then was not allowd to weightbear on that leg for 6 weeks. she used a frame at home and had to "hop" on the other leg that also needed a knee replacement. Since then she has had a TKR on the other leg, not without out terrible consequences, but it is ok now. She finds the leg where the femur was broken, very weak. My mum is 87 now. She uses a stick and a walker when walking out. She is not good with steps. She lives in a bungalow. My mum does have arthritis in her spine. She finds she has to go and lie down, sometimes many times a day, because walking makes her back hurt. I think much of it is to do with the fact that the "broken femur" leg is so very weak. She has also had a hip replacement, done twice (same hip).

    You are blessed to have such a wonderful husband. Carry on laughing together.

    Love
    Elna x
    The happiest people don't have the best of everything. They just make the best of everything.

    If you can lay down at night knowing in your heart that you made someone's day just a little bit better, you know you had a good day.
  • trisher
    trisher Member Posts: 9,263
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    biddybeth wrote:
    trisher wrote:
    Hi Biddybeth,

    Wow, what a lot you have been through. I do not blame not wanting anything else done.

    I know what it is like to have to have hubby to help. I'm glad you are also like me and are able to laugh with him too.

    I rely on hubby for so much, I'm confined to a wheelchair with my hubby as a full time carer. We do laugh a lot. Had a lot of surgery as well.

    Then arthur came and visited and decided to stay.

    I wish you well and hope you can have many more laughs with hubby

    Sending some ((((())))
    Love Trish xxxxxx

    Hi Trish, How lovely of you to reply. Didn't mean to moan, just sometimes life seems unfair. My husband would give me a kick up the backside if he had read that note. Quite rightly!!!. Take care, Love, Beth x

    Beth

    You are not moaning you are just telling us about you. Sometimes life is unfair.
    There are two paths you can take. The bitter one or the one where you can fight back and have a laugh.

    Yes, arthur can get you down, also you are in a lot of pain.

    We are entitled to have a moan now and the you would not be normal if you did not.

    Welcome to the Forums as well, I hope you like us.

    Love Trish xxx
  • tkachev
    tkachev Member Posts: 8,332
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Hi Biddybeth,

    That was a sad and shocking story and likewise Elnas mum. Sometimes surgery/treatment does not result in the expected result and thankyou for reminding us.
    When i had my THR last year I was told later they had a difficult time dislocating it before the removal and I suppose they were trying to avoid damaging other joints in the process. So I now realise how lucky I was so feel grateful.
    I hope you will come on the forum to have a chit chat. And i agree with Annie you certainly dont sound bitter.

    Elizabeth
    Never be bullied into silence.
    Never allow yourself to be made a victim.
    Accept no ones definition of your life

    Define yourself........

    Harvey Fierstein
  • speedalong
    speedalong Member Posts: 3,315
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Hi Biddybeth and welcome.

    What a dreadful story and how well you do to manage to keep laughing and take pleasure in the small things in life like rides out in the car.

    We are here to listen to your moans (and more light hearted moments too,) it is good to share the struggles and the funny side (when you can) with fellow ather suffers ... as none of us feel we can burden our friends and families too much.

    I have one not-so great THR (the surgeon had a lot of trouble inserting the stem of the ball socket into the femur - due to previous ops my bone marrow was non existent - the surgeon described my bone to be like ivory. It was inserted very close to one edge of the femur and he had to use bone grafts to reinforce that side of the existing femur. I had a long recovery. I can walk pain free but have some nerve damage - and my range of movement in that leg is limited....) Your post makes me realise how lucky I am that the outcome was as successful as it was. It took me 13 years to pluck up enough courage to have the other one done recently - which is much more successful and typical. I also have mild OA in my knees.

    Take care Biddybeth, I hope you are enjoying the sunshine today.

    Speedy
    I have had OA since mid twenties. It affects my hips and knees. I had a THR on the left aged 30 and now have a resurface-replacement on the right - done May 2010.
  • biddybeth
    biddybeth Member Posts: 45
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    snowball wrote:
    Hi Beth and welcome to the forum, they are a great friendly bunch on here. You have been through so much I have nothing but admiration for you. I have r/a too was diagnosed 5 years ago.
    Look forward to your post.

    Julie x
    Hi Julie, Annie and Trish. Great to hear from you. Had a good day today. Had my toenails cut at the Podiatry clinic this morning, bought my husband's birthday present, and did a bit of pruning in the garden. After that, I had my gin and tonic sitting out in the sun. Hope you all had a nice day. Beth x
  • biddybeth
    biddybeth Member Posts: 45
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Hi Elizabeth, Speedalong and Babycham, Your quotes warm my heart, thanks so much. I hope my story won't put anyone off having an op, as my experience was really unusual. Because I had RA for so long, my operations were more difficult for the surgeon, I knew that, as my bones had fused, so I was just unlucky, and I am grateful that can walk, 'tho slowly. Yes, my false femur is wired to my false hip too, like yours. What a state to get in eh? Had a nice day today, - had my feet done at the Podiatry Centre, then bought my husband's birhday present. This afternoon, pottered in the garden, then had my gin and tonic sitting in the sun!!! Hope you are all fine. Bethx
  • biddybeth
    biddybeth Member Posts: 45
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Hi Elna and Dreamdaisy, Thanks for your replies. I am so sorry to hear about your Mum. I know how she feels - my left leg with the false femur is very weak, and can't put any weight on it at all on its own. Getting dressed is a lengthy business and involves using my backscratcher to pull up my knickers!!!! Not a pretty sight!!!!! It is surprising how one can manage to get around problems with a bit of humour added. Beautiful day here today. Spent the whole afternoon in the garden. Take care. Beth x
  • barbara12
    barbara12 Member Posts: 21,281
    edited 16. Jun 2010, 15:59
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    Hi beth
    Its lovely to meet you again,I am so sorry you have had to go through so much in your life.
    Hopefully it has made you stronger in mind if not body, you have definitely come to the right site, we really do support one another through the good times and the bad, so if you ever need us you know were we are.
    How lovely that you have such a good oh and that you can laugh together.you enjoy yourselves.
    take care
    Love
    Barbara xx
    Love
    Barbara
  • elnafinn
    elnafinn Member Posts: 7,412
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Dear Beth

    You are truly a wonderful person. All you have been through you have such a good sense of humour. You and your husband sound a great team. I read that you have 8 grand children. You are truly blessed. I have one and I love her to pieces. She is so precious to me. Like you, I love our garden too. I forget everything when pottering outside and also when with my grand child.

    How old are your grand children? Lola will be 2 at the beginning of August. She chatters non stop and I am amazed at her vocabulary. she is so sensitive and loving. She is my tonic!

    I do hope you will stay with us on the forum. You are the just the type of person we need here!

    Love
    Elna x
    The happiest people don't have the best of everything. They just make the best of everything.

    If you can lay down at night knowing in your heart that you made someone's day just a little bit better, you know you had a good day.
  • trisher
    trisher Member Posts: 9,263
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    #Some of us are in there during the night when we cannot sleep as we are in pain.

    We also have Night Owls where we post during the night as well. It lets other know we are awake.

    So if you have a bad night, you know where to come.

    Trish xxx
  • biddybeth
    biddybeth Member Posts: 45
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Options
    elnafinn wrote:
    Dear Beth

    You are truly a wonderful person. All you have been through you have such a good sense of humour. You and your husband sound a great team. I read that you have 8 grand children. You are truly blessed. I have one and I love her to pieces. She is so precious to me. Like you, I love our garden too. I forget everything when pottering outside and also when with my grand child.

    How old are your grand children? Lola will be 2 at the beginning of August. She chatters non stop and I am amazed at her vocabulary. she is so sensitive and loving. She is my tonic!

    I do hope you will stay with us on the forum. You are the just the type of person we need here!

    Love
    Elna x
    Hi Elna, Lovely to hear from you. Yes, I have eight grandchildren. Alexander is 15, then there is a big gap before his sisters, Phoebe 8 and Madeline 6. Then there is Louis 7 Archie 5, Kit 4 next month, Esme 2 and Charlie 9 months. I think he will be the last, but who knows!!! I am so lucky. I love my garden too and at the moment it is lovely, full of roses and peonies. I'm always better in the summer, spending most of my time outside. It is lovely that you have Lola, they can be so funny at times, can't they!!! I shall certainly be staying on the forum. People are so supporting. Love, Beth
  • biddybeth
    biddybeth Member Posts: 45
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Options
    barbara12 wrote:
    Hi beth
    Its lovely to meet you again,I am so sorry you have had to go through so much in your life.
    Hopefully it has made you stronger in mind if not body, you have definitely come to the right site, we really do support one another through the good times and the bad, so if you ever need us you know were we are.
    How lovely that you have such a good oa, and that you can laugh together.you enjoy yourselves.
    take care
    Love
    Barbara xx
    Hi there Barbara, Lovely to hear from you. Yes, I'm afraid I have a wicked senseof humour. I think laughter is a good tonic, and life is too short to be down for long. Hope you are keeping fine. Love, Beth
  • biddybeth
    biddybeth Member Posts: 45
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Options
    annie_mial wrote:
    OMG, you have gone through it! I can't add anything, but wanted to give you my welcome to the forums!

    I'm one of the luckier ones, 65 now, but still have relative mobility (except on bad days) because I developed it late. My first brush with arthur was 10/12 years ago when I got polymyalgia rheumatica (still got it now) which left me unable to walk or function for a while (couldn't even brush my hair). That's when I got my love/hate relationship with steroids, they gave me my life back at the time, but have stolen it again since then!

    You sound like a fighting gal, so join the club!

    Annie
    Hi Annie, I have difficulty doing my hair and I discovered long-handled brushes and combs, which means I can now make the back of my head look reasonable. Not that I worried too much, I couldn't see it!!! Hope you are well at the moment. Love, Beth
  • annie_mial
    annie_mial Member Posts: 5,614
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Options
    biddybeth wrote:
    annie_mial wrote:
    OMG, you have gone through it! I can't add anything, but wanted to give you my welcome to the forums!

    I'm one of the luckier ones, 65 now, but still have relative mobility (except on bad days) because I developed it late. My first brush with arthur was 10/12 years ago when I got polymyalgia rheumatica (still got it now) which left me unable to walk or function for a while (couldn't even brush my hair). That's when I got my love/hate relationship with steroids, they gave me my life back at the time, but have stolen it again since then!

    You sound like a fighting gal, so join the club!

    Annie
    Hi Annie, I have difficulty doing my hair and I discovered long-handled brushes and combs, which means I can now make the back of my head look reasonable. Not that I worried too much, I couldn't see it!!! Hope you are well at the moment. Love, Beth

    Hi Beth, yes, I've got those - they make lovely backscratchers, too!

    Annie
  • biddybeth
    biddybeth Member Posts: 45
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    pixyandfaries wrote:
    welcome beth, i hope this place becomes your second home as it is to so many of us , pop in cafe for genral moaning gossip and pick me up [booz :wink: ] anytime, theres normaly some one around untill the early hours :wink: jan xx
    Hi Jan, what a comfort it is to know that there is usually someone around for a chat. You are a lovely lot and I am so glad I got involved. Many thanks, love, Beth
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