cinderella syndrome.

tkachev
tkachev Member Posts: 8,332
edited 1. Aug 2010, 11:16 in Community Chit-chat archive
Ive had an almighty struggle getting some shoes for a wedding. My feet are bigger and wider after 40 years of wearing the same size(apart from as a little girl of cours). Even flats hurt, some cut across the toes, my ankle hurts in others, toes crunch and some are leaving me with a tingling sensation. So I have to resort to the pair that hurt the least- but still hurt but I would never have chosen them from looking. There not that glamerous Im afraid. They are wide and have a small heel on them which is one consolation as have only worn trainers, and twice sandals, for many years.

Does anyone else have trouble getting shoes and are we to spend the rest of our lives wearing horrid, unflattering styles. Seems we have to overlook all those beautiful styles out there cos of arthritis!

Elizabeth
Never be bullied into silence.
Never allow yourself to be made a victim.
Accept no ones definition of your life

Define yourself........

Harvey Fierstein
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Comments

  • frogmorton
    frogmorton Member Posts: 26,740
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    I know Elizabeth....

    I think weddings and the like cause us so much more trouble than anyone els don't they? There have beeen threads on here about prettier shoes, but you know some a quite expensive. You can do a 'search' on the site.

    Glad you got a heel there. :) a bit feminine then?

    I think you may need some blister plasters too :roll:

    Love

    Toni xx
    Love

    Toni xxx
  • tkachev
    tkachev Member Posts: 8,332
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Toni,

    There is definately a shortage of decent styles to fit our funny feet! I bought wide but even they are difficult and one foot is a little bit wider than the other.
    Once the drinks flow nobody will care what Im wearing and I wish I could just wear my faithful trainers. However very pleased to get even a few inches taller as I am only 5,2. And they make your legs look thinner as clever Lucy pointed out at 6!

    I wonder how long I will last until Im staggering and in pain!

    Elizabeth
    Never be bullied into silence.
    Never allow yourself to be made a victim.
    Accept no ones definition of your life

    Define yourself........

    Harvey Fierstein
  • frogmorton
    frogmorton Member Posts: 26,740
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    How right you are!!! once they've had a few who cares?? :lol::lol:

    You can always stick your old faithfuls in a bag and take em with you for later :wink:

    At 5' 2 and a half I am with you 100% :wink:

    All kids have now passed me :roll:

    I do hope you enjoy yourself.

    Love

    Toni xx
    Love

    Toni xxx
  • barbara12
    barbara12 Member Posts: 21,103
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Elizebeth
    Like you I have to buy quite wide shoes, even the sandals I have at the min, are a bit cumbersome, they are the ones with Velcro fastening, the best ones I have found for being a little more stylish are pavers..have a look on line.
    Barbara xx
    Love
    Barbara
  • elnafinn
    elnafinn Member Posts: 8,043
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Elizabeth

    I have horrid wide, big feet too! :( Lucie went to a wedding on Saturday and she wore lovely flat sandals and with her outfit, she looked absolutely stunning. I walked down with them and watched some of the guests going into the church and you would not have believed how thick the platform soles were and how high the heels were. They were teetering forward as they walked slowly from the car into the church. :lol: Lucie said all the said shoes were kicked off asap and friends said to her how they wished they had worn shoes like her!

    Have a great time, Elizabeth, you will have a grand time :D

    Love
    Elna x
    The happiest people don't have the best of everything. They just make the best of everything.

    If you can lay down at night knowing in your heart that you made someone's day just a little bit better, you know you had a good day.
  • oneday
    oneday Member Posts: 1,650
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    They arent "beautiful" Elizabeth....take your rose tinted glasses off!! they are feet crushers!! I have always bought comfy shoes - infact my colleagues used to take the mickey out of me when i was in my 20s about them but i like comfort......Just think if you did manage to get your tooties in the high heeled contraptions you would be in agony, not worth it. Wear trousers to disguise the unflattering shoes!
  • pluggathome
    pluggathome Member Posts: 171
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    I hate shoe shopping for all the same reaons everyone else does!

    I have though just found me a fab pair of proper walking sandals and I thought about getting a few pairs so I'd always have some when they wore out but you just know them nobbly bits are gonna grow, move and brings friends!

    Have just been getting some new works clothes, material picked so no ironing required! I forget sometimes just how many concessions arthur and the other bits forces us to make :x

    Pluggxx
  • snowball
    snowball Member Posts: 3,523
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    I too hate shoe shopping and being 5ft 2 and 3 quaters (sorry had to get that in) its important when you are short.
    Last wedding I went too I went in flat sandles and they hurt my feet.
    What about berkingstock wonder if they do any nice sandles, they are expensive though, qvc website sell them it might be worth a look. I hope you have a lovely time what ever you decide to wear.

    Julie x
    ((((hugs)))) n xxxxx to ya all
  • tkachev
    tkachev Member Posts: 8,332
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Thankyou,
    Clothes and shoes are now sorted so just going to have to put up with it now. It does matter that we feel at least slightly gorgeous.

    I am going to be concerntrating on the children as I had my fun last weekend. Im not sure if Daniel is going to be happy as he is noise/music intolerant.
    I Will take my trainers in my bag! Glad Im not the only shortie.

    Elizabeth x
    Never be bullied into silence.
    Never allow yourself to be made a victim.
    Accept no ones definition of your life

    Define yourself........

    Harvey Fierstein
  • lindalegs
    lindalegs Member Posts: 5,408
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Elizabeth,

    It's horrible isn't it, I have to wear Orthotic Boots during the winter although I cheat in summer and wear sandals, but they are flat with velcro fastenings. When the hospital make my boots I ask for them to be done in bright colours to cheer me and the sandals I buy are usually coloured too.

    Have a look at the Cosyfeet website, I know alot look old ladyish but others aren't too bad.

    http://www.cosyfeet.com/

    You could always wear a maxi dress, as they're trendy now, or trousers to cover your footwear.

    Luv Legs XX
    Love, Legs x
    'Make a life out of what you have, not what you're missing'
  • tkachev
    tkachev Member Posts: 8,332
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Thankyou. I have a dress to hide the tummy, enhance the breasts and cover the ugly knees! Im very pleased with the waterfall cardigan which is very slimming. Everything looks nice just feels uncomfortable in certain places.

    I do have sandals but they do make my ankles look fat so decided not to wear them.

    Anyway Im not expecting to pull.

    E x
    Never be bullied into silence.
    Never allow yourself to be made a victim.
    Accept no ones definition of your life

    Define yourself........

    Harvey Fierstein
  • tkachev
    tkachev Member Posts: 8,332
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    OH is going!!!!!!


    Whenever a chap starts chatting to me he appears at my side. Always.

    E x
    Never be bullied into silence.
    Never allow yourself to be made a victim.
    Accept no ones definition of your life

    Define yourself........

    Harvey Fierstein
  • frogmorton
    frogmorton Member Posts: 26,740
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    tkachev wrote:
    OH is going!!!!!!


    Whenever a chap starts chatting to me he appears at my side. Always.

    E x

    HA!!!!

    Got 'in then!!!

    'e fancie the pants off you :wink:

    Your outfit sounds lovely

    You ahve a great time

    Love

    Toni xx
    Love

    Toni xxx
  • lindalegs
    lindalegs Member Posts: 5,408
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    tkachev wrote:
    .............................Anyway Im not expecting to pull.

    E x

    In my memory Elizabeth, if you did pull looking fantastic in your outfit, I don't think he'll be looking at you feet ......unless he has a foot fetish that is :wink:

    OH will probably be fighting them all off :shock:

    Love Legs XX
    Love, Legs x
    'Make a life out of what you have, not what you're missing'
  • angel1
    angel1 Bots Posts: 1,651
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Just popped in - still on me travels, no one got fed up with me yet! - to say that I hope you have a wonderful time Elizabeth. You are going to look stunning, remember that, and it will show!

    It reduces me to tears, when I read how lovely ladies, like yourself, have had their confidence damaged, so badly, by bl**dy Arthur. I was lucky that he didn`t find me til I hit my sixties, and I was always a cocky **** anyway!!.........Ange.
  • barbara12
    barbara12 Member Posts: 21,103
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    angel1 wrote:
    Just popped in - still on me travels, no one got fed up with me yet! - to say that I hope you have a wonderful time Elizabeth. You are going to look stunning, remember that, and it will show!

    It reduces me to tears, when I read how lovely ladies, like yourself, have had their confidence damaged, so badly, by bl**dy Arthur. I was lucky that he didn`t find me til I hit my sixties, and I was always a cocky **** anyway!!.........Ange.
    Oh Ange cant imagine you being cocky :shock: :) Elizebeth hope you have a lovely day...and athur stay away...lock him out :)
    Barbara xx
    Love
    Barbara
  • dreamdaisy
    dreamdaisy Member Posts: 31,558
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    I hope you do have a lovely time - and I hope you pull too: it might make the OH appreciate you a little more! Arthritis affects our bodies, that is very true, I can't believe mine, smothered in bruises thanks to pred, fat ankles, swollen knees, at the moment scabby elbows thanks to psoriasis - but it hasn't changed my spirit. I have never been sexy, never been drop-dead gorgeous, only acted as tho I was both. Believe me, that works. Have a lovely time. DD
    Have you got the despatches? No, I always walk like this. Eddie Braben
  • tkachev
    tkachev Member Posts: 8,332
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    DD you are right it. Just pretend to be gorgeous, its like the emperors new clothes.
    Arther kept away like a good boy but as hotel room was 2 floors up and Lucy needed changing 8 times I was pretty exhausted. First time in ages I managed not to rely on crutches. Then she got dive-bombed by a bat, fell over and so I had to nurse her for the rest of the evening.
    My noise intolerant son spent the whole evening on the dance floor Im told. And OH looked after him very well.
    Wedding was on Friday in Burnham in Berkshire and the setting was lovely so all-in-all a nice day,evening, night. I carried my shoes everywhere, like a handbag, but despite Elnas advice I trod on a rose thorn out in the gardens!I really should listen to her more.

    Elizabeth
    Never be bullied into silence.
    Never allow yourself to be made a victim.
    Accept no ones definition of your life

    Define yourself........

    Harvey Fierstein
  • elnafinn
    elnafinn Member Posts: 8,043
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Aw, dear Elizabeth, so pleased you all had a grand time. Oh dear, the bat incident and the rose thorn in foot, you did make me laugh with your comment to me, bless you! :) You will know for next time :wink::)

    Love
    Elna x
    The happiest people don't have the best of everything. They just make the best of everything.

    If you can lay down at night knowing in your heart that you made someone's day just a little bit better, you know you had a good day.
  • lindalegs
    lindalegs Member Posts: 5,408
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Glad you had a lovely time Elizabeth, it sounds as though you all did ...pity about the bat accident though.

    Well done your OH too, for coming up trumps.

    Luv Legs :D
    Love, Legs x
    'Make a life out of what you have, not what you're missing'
  • tkachev
    tkachev Member Posts: 8,332
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Thankyou,
    Well all 3 children were brought safely up to bed at some point. I havent actually heard if anything terrible happened whilst I was away and nursing Lucy so I have thanked him.
    Sadly I did miss a lot of the party but I was expecting that. And who ever put us 2 flights up deserves shooting!

    Elizabeth
    Never be bullied into silence.
    Never allow yourself to be made a victim.
    Accept no ones definition of your life

    Define yourself........

    Harvey Fierstein
  • snowball
    snowball Member Posts: 3,523
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Elizabeth glad you had a good time, hope you are having a good rest.

    Juie x
    ((((hugs)))) n xxxxx to ya all
  • dreamdaisy
    dreamdaisy Member Posts: 31,558
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    I'm glad it went well for the others, but not so happpy for you, missing much of the fun. That was a pity. Wear your shoes around the house for that little touch of glamour! DD
    Have you got the despatches? No, I always walk like this. Eddie Braben
  • tkachev
    tkachev Member Posts: 8,332
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    There not very glam considering the beautiful high shoes others were tottering about on. When I first had arther I used to potter about too in my knee high boots but it took its toll as I couldnt straighten my knees so I must have looked a sight.

    If my son had wanted to come upstairs to sleep I think we would have taken turns to party but supervising him in the dark with crowds of people is very hard work and I would have found it very tiring. I do prefer to leave them at home but it was a family wedding.

    Anyway I have another party to look forward too in early September, without the children.

    all the best
    Elizabeth x
    Never be bullied into silence.
    Never allow yourself to be made a victim.
    Accept no ones definition of your life

    Define yourself........

    Harvey Fierstein
  • livinglegend
    livinglegend Member Posts: 1,425
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Mucho cheapo or old, but comfortable trainers and a few different coloured cans of metallic car/art spray paint. Spray on in a random pattern and you become a trendy fashion leader and are comfy as well.

    Perhaps for next time, as you are now fixed up.

    Joseph 8)
    Josephm0310.gif