Dad not too good

suncatcher · 21. Aug 2010, 20:32

My dad hasnt been eating properly and caring for his self. He has memory problems and they have dramatically deteriorated in the past few weeks. We are getting him for a full check up and tests done on Tuesday. Dad was turned down for attendance allowance and we are trying again. My sister in particular does more of the caring for dad as she lives down the road from him.
My sister is ill from stress and high blood pressure. She is having a rest now. we are going down and my brother.To check on him and he is left meals. Tho we have reason to believe he is just eating nice sweet things and leaving good healthy things. He is getting seen by doctor. worried for him x Joanne

elnafinn · 21. Aug 2010, 20:44

Dear Joanne,

I am so sorry to hear about your dad. The elderly often prefer to eat sweet things like biscuits and drink tea than eat healthily. Min, whose celebrations we were at today for her 90th, was doing similar, throwing away her ready meals that were put out for her to put in the microwave and not taking her meds. She also has memory problems. Carers were put in place to check she has her meds and call in lunch time and prepare her meal for her. She has a cleaner as well. She has 4 children but the responsibilities fall on one of them as she lives the nearest. She was the one that arranged everything today too. Of course you are worried about him but I am sure you are doing as much as you are able. It can be so very difficult, as I well know, when my mum was unwell for a long time.

Love and gentle hugs
Elna x

joanlawson · 21. Aug 2010, 20:50

Hi Joanne

I'm sorry to hear of your worries about your Dad. This happened to my Dad too, so I know what it is like caring for someone who has memory problems. It is stressful, and you need all the help you can get. I hope the doctor will be able to advise you, and I would definitely keep trying for the attendance allowance.

Joan

suncatcher · 21. Aug 2010, 20:50

Friday I went to dads and the family gave me cards presents . We had drink and cake. Dad was not well. My sister made him a meal at home as he didn't feel well enough to go out. We badly needed a family chat though with out him there. My brothers been out the country and we had to fill him in and decide what to do next. We went out for a pub lunch so it was a celebration/meeting.

suncatcher · 21. Aug 2010, 20:52

elnafinn wrote:

Dear Joanne,

I am so sorry to hear about your dad. The elderly often prefer to eat sweet things like biscuits and drink tea than eat healthily. Min, whose celebrations we were at today for her 90th, was doing similar, throwing away her ready meals that were put out for her to put in the microwave and not taking her meds. She also has memory problems. Carers were put in place to check she has her meds and call in lunch time and prepare her meal for her. She has a cleaner as well. She has 4 children but the responsibilities fall on one of them as she lives the nearest. She was the one that arranged everything today too. Of course you are worried about him but I am sure you are doing as much as you are able. It can be so very difficult, as I well know, when my mum was unwell for a long time.

Love and gentle hugs
Elna x

Thank elna for that

suncatcher · 21. Aug 2010, 20:54

joanlawson wrote:

Hi Joanne

I'm sorry to hear of your worries about your Dad. This happened to my Dad too, so I know what it is like caring for someone who has memory problems. It is stressful, and you need all the help you can get. I hope the doctor will be able to advise you, and I would definitely keep trying for the attendance allowance.

Joan

I hope the doctor will advice us. Thank joan for kind words from joanne

valval · 22. Aug 2010, 00:21

can you not make him rice pudding and blamonge(sorry about spelling) a nice fruit crumble with custard all got some goodness in if he would rather have sweet at moment try smaller plates know my auntie gets put off food if there to much in front of her

tkachev · 22. Aug 2010, 02:34

hugs to you Joanne ((((())))). My nan lived on complan for many years and reached her 100th birthday. He probably doesnt want to eat to much so makes room for the sweet stuff only. At least he is eating something.
I know it is a worry for you and you already have enough on your plate so keep on trying to get him some care.

Take care
Elizabeth x

dreamdaisy · 22. Aug 2010, 06:09

Oh suncatcher, I am so sorry to read this. I hope you can get some help so that your sister isn't under so much strain. It's a worry for all of you, I know. Thinking of you. DD

Rainbow77 · 22. Aug 2010, 11:02

Hi Joanne

I am really sorry to hear that your dad is not well. I am glad though that you have had a meeting with the other members of the family and you can put together a plan to help him through this difficult time.

Thinking of you

Fayann xxx

skezier · 22. Aug 2010, 11:22

Hi Joanne,

I am really sorry to here that your dad's not doing so well. Its good you are having a family meeting and as Elna said can you get some kind of care package put in place for him?

I wish I could help but sending you a ((((( ))))) and a bucket of hopes you can get something sorted for him. Love Cris xx

snowball · 22. Aug 2010, 15:41

Hi Joanne I'm so sorry you are goung through this, my family and I are going through a simalir thing with my grandma. I do hope you get something sorted soon. Sending you a ((((hug)))).

Jules x

ironic · 22. Aug 2010, 19:16

Hi Joanne,
We have been through this with my dad so my heart goes out to you all.

Glad the family is getting together as you will all need each other.

Is he drinking? Just sometimes this can have an effect on memory when dehydrated.

Sorry you are having to go through this,

Lv, Ix

Dad not too good

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