Needing support......

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gill123
gill123 Member Posts: 2
edited 25. Aug 2010, 08:37 in Living with Arthritis archive
A close friend of mine has asked me to post this on her behalf. She has suffered with RA for about 25 years. She is feeling very isolated and alone at the moment and her mood is very low. She is finding it hard to cope day to day with feeling so ill and in pain. I was wondering if anyone could offer some support and advice on dealing with low mood and feeling isolated.

thanks!

:D

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  • barbara12
    barbara12 Member Posts: 21,281
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Hi
    For a start your friend is very lucky to have you, there are so many ups and downs with arthur, sometimes just being able to talk can really help.
    Try and get your friend to join us, It was a while before I got the courage to come on this forum, but it is the best thing I have ever done.
    The support she will receive from people that know what she is going through is priceless.
    Please give my love to your friend, and tell her we are here when she needs us.
    Barbara xx
    Love
    Barbara
  • dorcas
    dorcas Member Posts: 3,516
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Hello gill and welcome to the forum :D

    I'm sorry to hear about the difficulties your friend is going through just now....but glad that you have contacted us. We will do all we can to support your friend.x

    Isolation and low mood are all too often side effects of living with a chronic condition... and 25yrs is a long time to be coping with the constant nagging pain and impact of arthritis.

    It is lovely that you are there for your friend and your support will have been invaluable.

    This forum plays a big part in providing support in an informal but effective way and your friend would be made really welcome if she felt she could post ... all of us know what it is like to live with arther and understand and support each other through difficult times...but also share the positive times too.

    Your friend could also phone our great helpline (number at the top of the page) It is a completely confidential service and offers emotional as well as practical support.
    AC also has lots of publications and information leaflets that can be sent out by post or email... or can be read online.

    Is there anything more you can tell us about your friend? it would help to understand a bit more about her RA...how it affects her and what treatment and support she has had in the past from GP, rheummy etc ?

    hope to hear more from you soon....I'm sure there'll be other peeps along to say hi and offer advice .
    Iris x
  • annie_mial
    annie_mial Member Posts: 5,614
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    I echo Barbara, get your friend to join us if you can.........we may not be able to help in practical terms, but whatever the problem is there is almost certainly someone here who has had it, seen it, solved it and got several T shirts for it.........and who will give support and advice.

    For all those feeling isolated this is the best place I have ever found - join in and join the gang!

    Annie
  • airwave
    airwave Member Posts: 579
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    A depressed emotive state is an unfortunate product of chronic illness, tiredness, low confidence and pain can take their toll on our levels of emotional wellbeing. The ups and downs are a function of our illness and not an illness in itself and it is important we all realise this and learn to cope with feeling different and what we can do to change ourselves.

    Sit down and list what makes you feel more confident and positive about yourself and 'hey presto' you move onwards and upwards. A lifetime of happy memories is a helping hand. :D

    8) Its a grin, honest!

    P.S. My OH says chocolate helps as well........ I expect one of the girls will provide a feminine hug or even more chocolate? 80% dark stuff is good?
  • dreamdaisy
    dreamdaisy Member Posts: 31,520
    edited 25. Aug 2010, 02:45
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    Tell your friend to come and join us. We've all been there, we know exactly what it's like, we understand. Tell your friend to come as a guest: you can read posts, get a feel of what we do, how we are. My life changed on 22.4.10, and in such a positive way. DD
    Have you got the despatches? No, I always walk like this. Eddie Braben
  • woodbon
    woodbon Member Posts: 4,969
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Hello, I'm so sorry that your friend is having a bad time. I do not have RA, I have OA, but a lot of the problems are similar when talking about isolation and pain.

    Please get your friend to post on here, if at all possible, the friendship and support is invaluable and to be able to just share with others when things are too much. I know that my friends on here have provided help and support for me.

    You are a really good friend to provide so much help and support. I also know that its often not an easy position to be in, when you want to do something but, your not sure what the best thing is. To post on here is not easy but, as far as providing support for your friend, I think you have done the best thing you can. If your friend can't manage to come on here herself, I hope that you will feel that you can come on here when you need some extra support or information. I hope too, you try the helpline that Iris suggested on here its really very good, its helped me in the past.
    Lots of love Sue xxx
  • speedalong
    speedalong Member Posts: 3,315
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Hi Gill, how fab that you are there for your friend and encouraging her to join the forum - it is a great source of support, suggestions and cyber friendship and really makes you realise you are not alone in your struggles. Surf together and encourage her to read and post.

    Speedy
    I have had OA since mid twenties. It affects my hips and knees. I had a THR on the left aged 30 and now have a resurface-replacement on the right - done May 2010.
  • valb115
    valb115 Member Posts: 13
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Hi, it's friends like you that make coping with Arthur a lot easier. I'm very new to this forum, I was only diagnosed with RA last week. I did lurk on here for a long time before my diagnosis and found it an enormously useful source of information and support. I'm sure it's OK for your friend to be an observer and join in when she/he feels ready. Just knowing that there are others going through the same thing helped to lessen the feeling of isolation for me.
    Sending good vibes to you both x
  • angie1973
    angie1973 Member Posts: 248
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Your friend is very lucky having someone understanding like you.

    If she is able to join the group, then she will get bags of support, but in the meantime, send her a hug from us and tell her when she's ready, there is a whole group of lovely people on here!

    Take care
    Ange
    _______________________

    Only 99.9% possessed by the giggle monster.........the other 0.01 % just eats chocolate..
  • julie47
    julie47 Member Posts: 6,041
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Hi there

    I agree with what everyone has said, get your friend to join this forum.
    I have had RA 22 yrs .
    I joined not so long ago and i am glad i did. When ever you feel down you can come on here and thesewonderful people help you through it.
    Also its amazing how fast the time goes.
    hope your friend joins
    juliepf xx :)
  • mattpap
    mattpap Member Posts: 5
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Hi,

    I empathize with your friend's condition. What has helped me tremendously cope with low mood and lonelyness is Tony Robbin's videos on Youtube.

    Please, tell your friend to check them out.

    Matthew
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