awkward position with doctor

oneday
oneday Member Posts: 1,434
edited 5. Sep 2010, 08:56 in Community Chit-chat archive
I feel in an awkward position...basically i saw a community nurse who was very good at home about my son but doctor isnt happy i have seen someone else.
I feel piggy in the middle - i am not going behind gp back but just accessing a service that is available and they seem to have more time to spend answering my questions.
So,any suggestions when next see nurse as seems gp offended! gp says no need to see nurse but i want to.

Comments

  • lululu
    lululu Member Posts: 486
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    You need to make the best use of all the resorces you can find Oneday, if your GP is not happy about you trying to gather more help/information then that is not your problem - they are professionals let them cope with their insecurities.
  • oneday
    oneday Member Posts: 1,434
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    hi there,thanks for reply. the nurse was at my house for 2 hours-i cant get that time at the doctors. it doesnt seem fair that i am trying to come up with diplomatic words to say at next appoointment instead of just coming right out and saying gp doesnt want you to manage us!
    if it wasnt for the fact i go to drs so much and need them i would just do what i want which is to see the very helpful nurse who is a specialist.
  • dreamdaisy
    dreamdaisy Member Posts: 31,520
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Mention the visit and how helpful it was, then say that you felt you couldn't ask him to come out on a two hour home visit as that is not in his remit. (In my neck of the woods, even if you are dying, they like you to get a taxi to the surgery to see the doc.) I suspect he will soon realise what a prat he is being. Surely the Community Nurse is there to offer such a service. Don't feel guilty, you took the best option for your son. DD
    Have you got the despatches? No, I always walk like this. Eddie Braben
  • frogmorton
    frogmorton Member Posts: 29,831
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Sylv

    I like DD's reply - that should not cause ofense and anyway he should be glad that you have extra help - none of which undermines him Community nurses are brilliant people (the ones who work with People with learning disabilities particulalry) and know so much more specialised.

    I think I'd tell the nurse too that your GP might have been offeb-nded - in a jokey kind of way?

    Love

    Toni xx
  • julie47
    julie47 Member Posts: 6,041
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi oneday

    It isn't fair that you should have to choose.

    shouldn't these people work together and compliment each other with ideas.

    Hope your doctor sees sense and admits its a good idea for you to see both.

    Good luck i wish you well

    juliepf x
  • oneday
    oneday Member Posts: 1,434
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hello everybody and thank you for your replies,ideas.
    Well as you know I did keep the appointment with the community nurse and I did tell her what happened at doctors. Sons medications were changed by gp surgery in advance of this visit so nurse who was going to offer different medication says we will go along with gps new prescription for now. I said I am not going back to gp as didnt like way i was spoken to on this issue.
    Community nurse is specialist in sons field of complaint and has time. she says it doesnt cost gps money to use their service, its free but i have found out gp get paid for sons reviews!
    I will see other gps if i have to for illnesses for us all and if tactalled on whats happened i am going to hve to bite the bullet and say i didnt like the way i was spoken to.
    Also, community nurse will come to the house if son ill, i dont need to go to casulty etc! Our gps no longer come out, their on call locums no longer come out either!.....so if you have a very ill child you have to drag them to casulty,great isnt it...and they think i prefer this service to specialist nurse ready and waiting!
  • lululu
    lululu Member Posts: 486
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    I really feel for you oneday, It must be awfull having a sick child, especially considering that we adults somtimes have issues communicating with the professionals. You need to do the best you can for your son and that means going to where you feel you get the most appropriate help/advice.

    lulu
  • frogmorton
    frogmorton Member Posts: 29,831
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Sylv

    Hope it settles down, but I totally agree - community nurses are worth their weight in gold and you need one. Their contacts are excellent and their speciaklist knowledge too.

    Love

    Toni xx
  • chicara
    chicara Member Posts: 47
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    I have never had a community/specialist nurse as a child or an adult, but I know if I had a child of my own that had any sort of medical condition I would do everything I could to make sure they got the best care possible. So I think you are right to stand your ground and see the community nurse and as you say if necessary change GP.

    I have changed GPs/consultants many times. I had one GP who in his wisdom thought I should be able to manage my pain on paracetamol alone and nothing else. When you consider I've had Still's since I was nine and gone through everything from, steroids to ACTH injections and gold to methotrexate, to try and control my condition and that I've been through my fair share of analgesics too I could not believe what he was saying. So I haven't been back to see him since.

    I know it is hard at times but personally I'd stick to my guns and do what I felt was right for my family.

    Hope it all works out well for you.

    Take care

    Chicara
  • dreamdaisy
    dreamdaisy Member Posts: 31,520
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Doctors face a major problem in understanding us. They are all bl***y healthy. DD
    Have you got the despatches? No, I always walk like this. Eddie Braben
  • daylily
    daylily Member Posts: 619
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    I don't mean to make light of your problem but the title of your post makes me smile :)
    Is there only me with a dirty mind :?: :roll:
  • oneday
    oneday Member Posts: 1,434
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    hello...
    Rang nurse service up today as had a question which they looked into and rang back - how could i turn down such a service like that, that dr isnt too happy i am using?..its madness.
    This nurse will do things for us that gp isnt able to e.g. they can accompany me into school if necessary for discussions - why would i not take up this offer?
    i am angry with gp. they get paid per each swine flu injection - surely they are immune from "whats in it for me" society?
    as for pun with awkward positon - hadnt thought of that!!
  • daylily
    daylily Member Posts: 619
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    HOPE YOU ARE NOT OFFENDED.
    I'VE BEEN :lol::lol: SINCE I FIRST SAW THE TITLE AND HAD TO GIVE IN TO THE IMPULSE TO REPLY.
    YOUR DOCS BARMY-HE SHOULD BE GLAD YOU'RE GETTING THE EXTRA HELP.
    DO WHAT'S BEST FOR YOU.
    PERSONALLY I'VE LOST ALL FAITH WITH DOCS-BEEN BATTLING THE CLOSED RANKS AT MY PRACTICE FOR A MONTH NOW.
    HAD DISAGREEMENT WITH ONE AND THEY'RE ALL BEING 'OFF' WITH ME NOW AND WILL NOT CONTRADICT EACH OTHERS DIAGNOSIS SO I'VE GOT NO DIAGNOSIS AT ALL. DOESN'T HELP THE PAIN THOUGH :!: :!: :!:
  • oneday
    oneday Member Posts: 1,434
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    not offended at all......surprised it hadnt occurred to me!
    Just spoke to someone about it and they said would doctor "strike" me off books if i see someone else i.e. the nurses instead of them.
    Can gps strike pateints off and for what reason?
  • coco67
    coco67 Member Posts: 2,374
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    hello one day. next time your at the drs try this.

    well you see dr.............. i value your time and expertease and fully understand that you are a busy man so i dont want to be selfish and take up all your time, thus denying many people the valuable help you have to offer so i have desided to take up the offer of help from the nurse as she can attend my home and the school if required and not leave so many sick people queing at your door, your time is very valuable to me. so i hope you understand my choice not to be selfish and take all your time :lol:
  • oneday
    oneday Member Posts: 1,434
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    ooh, yes, thats good and i do feel rushed sometimes at the drs. I feel recently as though some diktat (?) has come down about time spent with pateients, usually i talk as long as it takes but last two times i have been told appt must finish now because of the time! guess theyre getting pressure from somewhere but they dont need to take it out on pateients. Other workers have instructions from above they arent pleased about and dont take it out on customers do they.
  • trisher
    trisher Member Posts: 9,263
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Oneday

    If you are happy seeing the nurse carry on doing it. I thought that these services worked hand in hand with one another. They should do.

    The nurse has more time to listen that a GP.

    If I were you I would just carry on as you are. Let the nurse and the doctor have words.

    Trish xxxx
  • oneday
    oneday Member Posts: 1,434
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    decided to not see that particular gp again as i have a choice of others at practise, then if main/senior gp were to tackle me i will say nurse has more time for my questions etc and dont like way other gp spoke to me - great isnt it? got enough to think about without them taking out their rivalry against each other with me. I think the nurse would kick off big style but i have said i dont want her too - she is v keen and can tell she is going places, v innovative etc.
  • tkachev
    tkachev Member Posts: 8,332
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    daylily wrote:
    HOPE YOU ARE NOT OFFENDED.
    I'VE BEEN :lol::lol: SINCE I FIRST SAW THE TITLE AND HAD TO GIVE IN TO THE IMPULSE TO REPLY.
    YOUR DOCS BARMY-HE SHOULD BE GLAD YOU'RE GETTING THE EXTRA HELP.
    DO WHAT'S BEST FOR YOU.
    PERSONALLY I'VE LOST ALL FAITH WITH DOCS-BEEN BATTLING THE CLOSED RANKS AT MY PRACTICE FOR A MONTH NOW.
    HAD DISAGREEMENT WITH ONE AND THEY'RE ALL BEING 'OFF' WITH ME NOW AND WILL NOT CONTRADICT EACH OTHERS DIAGNOSIS SO I'VE GOT NO DIAGNOSIS AT ALL. DOESN'T HELP THE PAIN THOUGH :!: :!: :!:

    Hi Daylily. I had to read the title a few times! Dont feel bad.....

    Elizabeth
    Never be bullied into silence.
    Never allow yourself to be made a victim.
    Accept no ones definition of your life

    Define yourself........

    Harvey Fierstein