Fatigue

joanneredshaw

Hello everyone

I would like to ask how long I will feel so tired? I have been signed off from work for 2 weeks due to fatigue and a flare up of RA. I did not know about fatigue being linked to Arthritis, my Consultant and Rheumatolgy nurse didn't say a thing. Just told to read the leaflets which were to decide upon treatment....
It's since I joined the forum on Monday that I realised what was wrong and why I felt so bad.I have been feeling really negative and have not been kind to my husband. He justs irritates me and I can't seem to get back on track.


Any suggestions?

jo :?:

skezier

Hi Jo,

Sorry your feeling the fatigue... its not good is it?!

I can't say how long cus it varies in my case so much. The last one hasn't really left yet but it as on;y for a couple of weeks I kept falling asleep every time I sat down.....

I think you have to rest up as you need to and be kind to your self for a bit. It will pass Jo just in its own time I think. Sending you a ((( ))) and so many of us know how your feeling. Cris x

dippydoodah

sometimes i think the fatigue is worse than the pains. i have oa and fibro and the fatigue completely wipes me out. i think it varies from day to day and everyone suffers differently. i have several days where all i want to do is sleep or lie down then i can have a few days where im full of energy (not necessarily able to do anything about that energy but at least its there lol )

the only thing i have been told is go with it. if your body needs to rest, let it. don't worry about housework, it can wait. make sure you get the rest you need when you need it, if you can x

joanneredshaw

Thanks for your responses,

I never know whether I should go with it as I look around and see the housework that needs to be done. But then I dread doing some hoovering as it wipes me out.
My husband is good but I have caught him moaning to the children.. They do help me as well, as they are 14 and 16 year old boys.
I find that afternoons and evenings are the worst as I am constantly yawning and can't do a lot. It was an effort to even have a bath.
I will do as you suggest and rest when I need to.

Thanks

Jo

dreamdaisy

Truth? For me I cannot remember my last really alert day. You do learn to pace yourself so that you don't get so wiped out. You learn to trade one job for another: I was going to vacuum today but then realised it's wheelie bin day and I do find putting that out a trial, so I forgot the vacuuming and opted for changing the sheets and duvet etc. Vacuuming will always be there. Google The Spoon Theory - it gives a very good explananation of how tough we can find life for those that don't have a clue. DD

dippydoodah

afternoons and evenings are the worst for me too, especially afternoons. for some reason as soon as it hits lunch time, i start to feel groggy and need to sit down, then my eyes start to hurt and im knocked out for several hours (thankfully boys are in school and hubby is around)

DD is right, spread your jobs out. i darent do everything at once these days, i cleaned my floors this morning but they havent been done for a while :oops: and that'll probably be my job for today. tomorrow i'll probably tackle the carpets upstairs but that'll be it for tomorrow too.... i only do it when i can and if it doesnt get done, ive actually stopped feeling guilty (something which i never thought would happen as my friends and family all say im like monica from friends and theyre quite surprised to see me so laid back lol)

its good that your hubby and your lads help. i have 3 little boys age 3, 5 and 9 and theyre brilliant at doing jobs (for a jelly baby lol) making their beds or carrying their plates to the sink etc... i have a little 'treat' jar with some jelly babies and dolly mixtures in, they sometimes get 1 sweetie for doing a ob (bribery i know but sometimes its needed :oops: )

hope you feel a little brighter soon x

angel1

Sadly this rotten condition affects the whole family Jo.

Perhaps if you could all sit down together, and talk everything through, it would be a start. Let them read the leaflets too, and even show them the replies from the Forum. Good communication, and the more information shared, should help you all come to terms with things. Make a rota for everyone to muck in, and help out. Never be afraid to say "I can`t do it, I need your help". Stress is a big factor also, and will only exacerbate the condition. They love you, and will want to help you.

Rest as much as you need to. I hope you feel a little better soon.......Ange.x.

debsmartin

I'm afraid I still get very tired even though my injections are really helping me on the pain side, my families nic name for me is Noddy, as I can drop off at anytime of the day. I think its just your bodies way of helping you to get the rest you need

debs

joanneredshaw

Thanks everyone

I suppose after 4 years of being diagnosed I am finally facing up to the fact that I can't do everything anymore. It makes me very tearful that I still haven't accepted my condition.
I put on a brave face to everyone and I am not good at asking for help, I am very much like my Grandmother who never complained but put up with a lot of pain.
I am sure with everyones help, the forum included, I will start to feel better soon.
At least I know I have you all to discuss my worries and to listen to my moans.

Thanks a lot & I hope I can help someone too.

Jo

dorcas

Hi Jo

fatigue is such a big part of having arther.... especially so when having a flare. The body is being asked to fight an internal foe and it uses up our energy resources, hence the overwhelming tiredness.

being irritable is also a by product....when you're tired the littlest thing seems like a huge challenge and snapping at loved ones an unfortunate outcome!

explain to everyone how you feel... and tell them that it's the arther that's just pushing you physically and emotionally over the edge.

Why not download some of AC's publications on the impact arther has .. it might help your family to see it in black & white.

hope you feel a little better and more rested today.

Iris xxx

dreamdaisy

Acceptance takes time: I have yet to meet someone who has bounced out of rheumatology saying 'Oh well, now I know what's wrong that's fine. My life has changed beyond all recognition and I am no longer the person I thought I was but that's OK, I like the new, always-tired-and-unable -to-do-stuff me.' It's a skill, this learning to juggle life, and it takes time and practise. Other people have to adjust with you, so as dorcas advises (wisely, as always) see if you can sit down with your husband and children and talk it all thro. This is a difficult time for all of you - be kind to yourselves, and each other. You are all feeling the pressure. DD

joanneredshaw

dreamdaisy wrote:

Truth? For me I cannot remember my last really alert day. You do learn to pace yourself so that you don't get so wiped out. You learn to trade one job for another: I was going to vacuum today but then realised it's wheelie bin day and I do find putting that out a trial, so I forgot the vacuuming and opted for changing the sheets and duvet etc. Vacuuming will always be there. Google The Spoon Theory - it gives a very good explananation of how tough we can find life for those that don't have a clue. DD

Hi DD

Thanks for your reply, I will indeed Google The Spoon Theory and make sure I pace myself. I know I was doing too much..

Jo

trisher

angel1 wrote:

Sadly this rotten condition affects the whole family Jo.

Perhaps if you could all sit down together, and talk everything through, it would be a start. Let them read the leaflets too, and even show them the replies from the Forum. Good communication, and the more information shared, should help you all come to terms with things. Make a rota for everyone to muck in, and help out. Never be afraid to say "I can`t do it, I need your help". Stress is a big factor also, and will only exacerbate the condition. They love you, and will want to help you.

Rest as much as you need to. I hope you feel a little better soon.......Ange.x.

Hi Jo

Nice to meet you.

Firstly you are fighting two different sides of Arthur. One it's the pain and the effects RA has on you, the other being the fatique.

I was talking to Ange one day and she advised me to tell the family let them into the world I was now in.

As she said communication is important.

Once we had all talked about it they wanted to read the leaflets to help them understand as well.

They felt guilty that they should have known I was not my normal self.

They have learned a lot too and were surprised just what is involved with having arthritis of any kind.

They helped more with the things I could not do. If I was snappy they knew why. They became more involved.

She gave me a lot of helpful advice I took it and I have not looked back since then. If anything we have become closer.

I really hope you do the same.

Love Trish xxxx

ritwren

Hi Jo are'nt you glad you've found this forum. I'm still coming to terms with my diagnosis and agree with all the info you've been given on here.
I just want to add that it's important not to be too hard on yourself. Through time you will learn to pace yourself and hopefully get adequate pain relief, treatment and rest. It's true what they say, no man is an island and we all have to share at least some of our feelings otherwise they will build up and make us ill.You are dealing with so much new information now and your body and mind will need time to adjust.
Coming on here is a brilliant help and I am here sometimes even if I'm not posting. I sometimes feel if I start complaining or saying how I feel I'll never stop but I'm learning how to work things out. You will too but give yourself time. Try to share the new information you're getting with your OH or someone close to you so that you have someone to talk things through with.
I wish you all the best with your adjustments and decisions. Hang in there
rita

woodbon

Hello, Nice to meet you! I'm sorry you have RA and I hope that you will find this forum useful to you, I do, and Ican rant on without making my husband misarible.

I don't have RA, but I do have OA in a lot of my joints. I also know that I get very tired and can understand how you feel. I sometimes look round and feel so guilty because I've not done everything, but then I know I can't. I think that communiction is important, you really need to get it across to your family just how you feel. So many things in life go wrong because we dont' do enough preductive talking and tend to either carry on as normal but, find we can't or give others a false impression and they don't realise just how hard things are and whats going on.

I think I'd sit down with the leaflets and say you need to discuss what is going to help you all most. Maybe your husband can either adapt or find things in the shops and catalouges to make life easier. Mine loves the catalouges hes always been an adict and now he can buy things! I do find the heated pad which is meant for knees, slightly hard to wear wrapped around my neck and and with the heated bit at the back and the elastic band that hold it in place at the front!!! :shock: Now theirs a sight! :oops: It does work!!!

Anyway, I hope things get better for you as you all adapt. Lots of love, Sue xxxx

cebeem

Hi Jo
The tiredness is a burden...but!
I was told to balance activity with rest...If I work for 3 days ..I am going to need 3 days off!
If I go walking (round town) for 30 mins I need at least 30 mins time out to perk up again.
Sometimes to my downfall I have thought I could go on for ever!!!
Then when you stop Bam!!! its very hard to get going again..(and the same rule kicks in...and the equivalent amount of rest will be the only solution)..that's how it works for me!
Hope that helps some!

*CB*

joanneredshaw

Hello to everyone!

I want to say a big thank you to all of you who have replied to my post. Day by day I have started to feel much better.But only because I have rested. My joints are still sore at times and have changed from the left side to the right! I have heat pads that really get into the knuckles. I even managed to cook the tea last night....
My boss has emailed twice and is going to adapt my timetable for me. As I work in a secondary school with children who have special needs. I do feel that if I can work up until lunch time, then I have the afternoons off to have a rest and cook the tea etc.

I have told a friend of this forum as she suffers with fibromyalga. Don't think I have spelt that correctly. lol.

Jo

dreamdaisy

Well done to your boss - let's hope he can adjust things to suit, and that you can adjust too. You were nearly there with the fibro - you need an i after the g to soften it but then how often do you write/type fibromyalgia? So much about English spellings is based on visual memory - it's complicated! DD

cebeem

wish I had a boss like that ....they are few and far between these days!!!!
*CB*

beowolf

hi jo

i'm glad you're feeling better and your boss is being helpful.....it makes all the difference doesn't it?

hope you have a great week-end

Beo

marion1952

Hi Jo

Definitely you must listen to your body and not try to 'work through' the fatigue..

Many years ago (long before I had RA), I used to have a velvet pile carpet and I used to get on my hands and knees with a clothes brush twice a week to brush the pile in the same direction!!

Now - I have laminate floors, very few ornaments and use lots of antibacterial wipes ... anything to make life easier for me!!

Take care

Marion x

joanneredshaw

marion1952 wrote:

Hi Jo

Definitely you must listen to your body and not try to 'work through' the fatigue..

Many years ago (long before I had RA), I used to have a velvet pile carpet and I used to get on my hands and knees with a clothes brush twice a week to brush the pile in the same direction!!

Now - I have laminate floors, very few ornaments and use lots of antibacterial wipes ... anything to make life easier for me!!

Take care

Marion x

Thanks Marion

I am learning to adjust slowly, I did feel that I had to get everything done and then I would feel exhausted. It's nice that my boss has adjusted my hours, I do feel as if she values me at work.

Have a lovely weekend.

Jo

joanneredshaw

Good morning all!

It's a beautiful day in Cambridgeshire, didn't get up til nearly 10 am but it's the weekend so what does it matter.

I do feel as if I am sleeping better and I feel more rested when I wake up. Probably a combination of rest and less stress.
I have another week off sick and will return on the 27th or 28th Sept.Depending on my new timetable.
I must say it has been lovely not to work and pace myself, I have looked after my joints better and gone back to bed as soon as I need to.

I have my canaries to clean out now, but they are a joy to watch and listen to when they sing..

Have a lovely weekend everyone, I am going out tonight with a friend to a clairvoyant evening in the local community centre. That should be interesting.

Lots of love to everyone

Jo

frogmorton

Hi Joanne

Sorry I missed this :oops: Not sure how :oops:

anyway I have read it from top to bottom and am very pleased you feel so much better and that you have such a lovely boss

I am glad you found us and hope to see you on here posting more.

LOve and YOU have a good weekend too!

Toni xx

Starburst

Hi Jo,

I'm glad you're feeling better this weekend. Hope you enjoy the sunshine.

RA is a bit like a rollercoaster, you have ups and downs. I have days where I can't get out of bed and days where I have energy galore. Pacing yourself is very important, you should try not to do too much on the days where you feel better, in order to not burn out. I do find this hard because when you feel good you want to do everything!

x

joanneredshaw

princess01 wrote:

Hi Jo,

I'm glad you're feeling better this weekend. Hope you enjoy the sunshine.

RA is a bit like a rollercoaster, you have ups and downs. I have days where I can't get out of bed and days where I have energy galore. Pacing yourself is very important, you should try not to do too much on the days where you feel better, in order to not burn out. I do find this hard because when you feel good you want to do everything!

x

Thanks for everyones feedback.

I did over do it a bit, but resting now and my Son has helped cook the tea. Although I now have heat pads on both hands....

But hay I had to clean out my canaries...

Jo xx