Definitions

joanlawson

Reincarnation: Wearing exactly the same flower in your lapel at a wedding as you wore at the last wedding you went to.

Autobiography: The life story of a car.

Permutation: A bad hair day.

Monkeys: What they use to unlock doors in a monestary.

Politician: A man who will double cross that bridge when he comes to it.

Rhubarb: A kind of celery gone bloodshot.

Steroids: Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs.

Pasteurize - Where your life flashes during a near-death experience.

Medical Definitions

* Bacteria - Rear entrance to the cafeteria
* Triage - The number of years that an oak or pine has been alive
* Paradox - Two doctors
* Coma - Italian device for brushing your hair
* Plastic surgery - Cutting up your credit cards
* Insane - What you end up in if you jump off a bridge in Paris
* Intravenous drip - Light rain, on planet Venus

trisher

Joan

Are you sure you feel alright? :shock: Where do you get these from?

Love Trish xxx

frogmorton

nice ones Joan

suzster

i thought paradox was a parachuting dr!

sorry!
sue

joanlawson

trisher wrote:

Joan

Are you sure you feel alright? :shock: Where do you get these from?

Love Trish xxx

I'm fine thanks Trish, and so is Tommy Tucker



I get them from the far-flung corners of the internet, where only silghtly mad people venture

oneday

like them.....
off course saw thread title, thought this must be joan and sure enough its you! keep up the good work, thought provoking.

joanlawson

Thanks Oneday. Here's a few more dotty definitions.

Fungi - Male party animal.
Fungal - Female party animal.
Mushroom - Where fungi and fungal get together.

Aftermath: Kept behind when school finishes to catch up on your arithmetic.

Dilate - To live longer than expected.

Politics - A kind of bloodsucking parasite that infects parrots. (it makes them talk too much)

Bankruptcy - A fate worse than debt.

Detergents - what perfumes aren't supposed to do.

dorcas

Love it Joan

Iris xxx

joanlawson

Glad you like them Iris. Here's a couple more-couldn't resist :!:

Catalyst: Several cows names written in alphabetical order.

Announce - One sixteenth of a pound.

frogmorton

joanlawson wrote:

trisher wrote:

Joan

Are you sure you feel alright? :shock: Where do you get these from?

Love Trish xxx

I'm fine thanks Trish, and so is Tommy Tucker



I get them from the far-flung corners of the internet, where only silghtly mad people venture

It this tommy Tucker??

He looks a wee bit like Daisy!!!!

Love

Toni xx

joanlawson

Hi Toni

No, it's not Tommy Tucker , but it's a bit like him. You can see photos of Tommy ( and me ) if you click on the link on my profile.

Joan

lupin15

joanlawson wrote:

Glad you like them Iris. Here's a couple more-couldn't resist :!:

Catalyst: Several cows names written in alphabetical order.

Announce - One sixteenth of a pound.

I must remember that last one...love it

lupin15

frogmorton wrote:

joanlawson wrote:

trisher wrote:

Joan

Are you sure you feel alright? :shock: Where do you get these from?

Love Trish xxx

I'm fine thanks Trish, and so is Tommy Tucker



I get them from the far-flung corners of the internet, where only silghtly mad people venture

It this tommy Tucker??

He looks a wee bit like Daisy!!!!

Love

Toni xx

Lovely cat but not sure if he is smiling or eyeing me up for lunch ????

lupin15

joanlawson wrote:

Hi Toni

No, it's not Tommy Tucker , but it's a bit like him. You can see photos of Tommy ( and me ) if you click on the link on my profile.

Joan

He is so cute. Must try and get some pictures of my pets...cat dog and a snake.

tonesp

Mistress Something that's between a Mister and a Mattress

joanlawson

tonesp wrote:

Mistress Something that's between a Mister and a Mattress

Good one, Tone

Horoscope - A device for measuring how scary something is.

Apricot: Where baby apes sleep.

Junk - The stuff we throw away
Stuff - The junk we keep.