lifes a bi****

theresa4
theresa4 Member Posts: 696
edited 29. Oct 2010, 19:42 in Living with Arthritis archive
I know yet another negative post from miserable Theresa4
My grandaughter is adorable but apart from that life is pretty niserable maybe should be thankful for beautiful grandaighter but cant help feeling Im settling.
My hubby is annoyed Im on the PC again yet hes not willing to chat to me!! Noboody will. Does anyone else feel like theres nothing left to go on for? Im sick of making the best of things nobody cares even m y rheumy nurse has stopped replying despite me askiong for help. My Gp is ringing me on Friday maybve he will have answers . Im 39 and feel 99 I have no s** life, am lonely and feel like a burden just sat crying and puttin on you when you all have as many problems. sorry

Theresa xx
There are many things in life that will catch your eye, but only a few will catch your heart...pursue those. --Michael Nolan



Theresa xxx

Comments

  • skezier
    skezier Member Posts: 11,333
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Theresa,

    Flower your having a bad time but it will pass, you have to remember that. I was where you are n 2000 and its juts a horrible place to be.

    Re-read all the support you had on your other post and remember you are not worthless, your not a waste of space but you do need to talk it through with someone.

    Did you ring the helplines at all? they are so good and they know about arthritis cus most o them have it as well.

    Its hard when your younger and feel so old and all I can do is promise you it will get better. Its a slow time to get there and as slow or slower to get back up but you will do it. When your gp rings please just tell them how your feeling and see what help he will give you. Keep posting flower cus here you are never alone. I wish I knew what to say and leaving you a ((((( ))))) Cris xx
  • chris7
    chris7 Bots Posts: 2,696
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Theresa

    You can chat or have a whinge whenever you want on here and be assured you are listened to and have our sympathy. I know things are really tough for you at the moment and you do have my sympathy and hugs. Hang in there, hope the doc can give you some support on Friday. We are listening. ((((( )))))
    Chris
  • tjt6768
    tjt6768 Member Posts: 12,170
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    You should never feel like you're a burden on here, I have learned that much... It is what the site is for, unloading your troubles and hopefully getting some answers etc etc..
    I understand entirely how you feel, I am 42 and have been suffering with this **** disease for about 12 yrs now.. I have always been ok at coping with it mentally till my wrists started ealy this yr, now that has knocked my confidence, I try not to that show though as I don't want to upset my Wife, she has been so good and understanding but has heart failure so I try and avoid any form of stress..

    Just keep on posting and we'll all do our best to be there and respond I'm sure.

    You're not alone

    Tony
    e050.gifMe-Tony
    n035.gifRa-1996 -2013 RIP...
    k040.gif
    Cleo - 1996 to 2011. RIP
  • frogmorton
    frogmorton Member Posts: 29,332
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Oh Theresa

    You poor thing.

    Husbands/partners can sometimes be a bit like this - you said that to us - did you say it to him? Have you let it all out to him? if not maybe now is the time - maybe you should write it down if he is not a good listener? Some men aren't (some women for that matter) AND IF THEY CAN'T 'FIX' A PROBLEM DON'T WANT TO know.

    Sorry caps lock :oops:

    Yes your Granddaughter is definitely a huge blessing and you are so lucky to have her. She is a good distraction and physical evidence that you being here has SO been worth it.

    That said I am with the others and do agree that the doc must be told how bad you have got and low :( There is help there for you.

    Who suggested the A/C helplines? Was it Cris? I used them when I first found this site and they were wonderful - had to wait forever for me to stop bawling, but wonderful :D

    And never forget we are her either will you?

    Love and hugs

    Toni xx
  • dreamdaisy
    dreamdaisy Member Posts: 31,520
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Wise words from eveyone, theresa4. We can't fix things for you, only you can do that. Use some of this negative energy for your benefit: ring the helpline, ring your doctor, ring the Samaritans, talk to us via the forum or a PM. This disease is extremely stressful - you have not been well for a long time, your arthritis is quite active, the drugs are not doing much, your family are not that supportive, it's no wonder you are in a deep, dark hole. Now it's time to start trying to get you out but you have to make the first moves. We can't do that for you, much as we may want to. Ring somebody, talk to them. I think the helpline is the best and your first port of call: they know what this disease does to the person who has it and the people around them. Thinking of you. DD
    Have you got the despatches? No, I always walk like this. Eddie Braben
  • dippydoodah
    dippydoodah Member Posts: 350
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    oh hun im so sorry to read how you're feeling and all i can do is reiterate what everyone else has said. never ever believe you are worthless. you said yourself, your grandaughter brings you a smile and im sure you are what makes her smile too.

    you can always come on here, whether you're moaning or not ~ its what we all do :D thats why we're here. everyone here knows exactly how you must been feeling, there's no 'get a grip' talk here...

    im sorry i cant help i just hope more words of comfort might make you feel better?
    sending you virtual (gentle) hugs xxx
  • woodbon
    woodbon Member Posts: 4,969
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    I'm so sorry to hear you write like this. I know that I sometimes have down times but I'm 55 and thats a lot older than 39. I envy you your gradaughter though, as we couldn't have children, I had a hystorectomy for endometrosis before I married and wanted a family.

    I get moaned at too, for using the PC, usually in the evenings, yet if I sit down my husband goes to sleep! No pleasing some.

    I hope your GP comes up with something that helps you. Loads of love Y& hugs Sue xxx
  • julie47
    julie47 Member Posts: 6,041
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Theresa

    Every one has said what i would say, so all i can do is send along a cyber hug (((((((())))))))) and hope that you soon feel better

    Thinking of you

    JuliePF x
  • frogmorton
    frogmorton Member Posts: 29,332
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Mine says nothing about ne using the computer, but oddly, I avoid using it at night :?

    No news from Theresa today?

    Hope you are feeling more yourself today Theresa?

    Thinking of you

    Love

    Toni xx
  • theresa4
    theresa4 Member Posts: 696
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    toni DD Dippy Sue Julie Tony Chris and Chris 7 hope I didnt miss anyone

    Thankyou all for listening. I havent been well at all today so been sleeping til now. Keep going dizzy even sat down and the hot sweats have started again. I wrote another email to my rheumy nurse thanbkfully she has finally replied to say she will speak to the doc in charge of the Cimzia trial tomorrow and get back to me. Nothing else though see what comes tomorrow and I will discuss it with my GP.

    Much Love
    Theresa xxx
    There are many things in life that will catch your eye, but only a few will catch your heart...pursue those. --Michael Nolan



    Theresa xxx
  • barbara12
    barbara12 Member Posts: 21,280
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Theresa
    Please don't apologize for having a rant, getting it off your chest will help a little bit.
    I have OA, but I know that some days I really cant take anymore, and then within days I feel more myself, has for your hubby have you tried talking to him, and really telling him how you feel.
    My Oh was like this, them one day I had a good talk to him, and apologized for having to keep asking for help, and how much being on this forum helped, it really did clear the air.
    I wish you well, and hope your rheumy gives you some help.
    Sending lots of hugs (((((((())))))
    Love
    Barbara x
    Love
    Barbara
  • tkachev
    tkachev Member Posts: 8,332
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Theresa I felt just like you a few years ago. There were so many issues and problems. My OH was resentful that he couldn't go out very often as how could I cope with the children? Eventually got carers to come and babysit us all while he went out. He never helped with the children. I would be struggling to tidy up and care for the children with tears streaming down my face which of course he never noticed!
    I really understand how you feel. When you are ill that is when you see the real person you married- some adapt and others sadly don't.

    Getting better myself(with increased medication) was the answer for me. So now I just get on with everything myself and not have to ask him for anything.
    We never have been good at talking our problems through but at least I now can escape from the nastiness...like when you need a cuppa and cannot go down the stairs and the OH strops off to bed without helping to spite you. I am just hoping I don't become really bad again.
    Best wishes
    Elizabeth
    Never be bullied into silence.
    Never allow yourself to be made a victim.
    Accept no ones definition of your life

    Define yourself........

    Harvey Fierstein
  • ironic
    ironic Member Posts: 2,361
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Theresa,

    So sorry that you are still feeling low. Stress does nothing to help the hot sweats and dizzy spells.
    I do hope the rheumy nurse rings you back early tomorrow. Having a word with your GP and telling him exactly how you feel might be for the best.
    Hope you have managed to eat something. Wishing you a better night’s sleep tonight. Hang on in there flower.

    Hugs coming your way,
    Lv, Ix
  • theresa4
    theresa4 Member Posts: 696
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Well that was worth waiting for NOT...... :x

    Finally got a reply from rheumy nurse, Consultant not in today spoke to ward registrar who says I should cancel rheumy appointment and get a new one after my ENT appointment ( great so more weeks to wait yert again) As for flu vac oh you can get it if your GP will let you as your not well........

    Thanks specialists for your advice!! NOT . :roll: anyway my GP has said he feels getting the flu will probably be worse than the reaction I will have from the vac itself but prepare to feel quite ill possibly for a few weeks. Joy
    I have been up all night in agony and burning joints again in my hands wrists and knees so Ive been high on tramadol all day which means nightmares tonight :cry:

    Stilll feeling abandoned by the medics but hey had lovely family meal last night finally had all my kids granddaughter and hubby together. I wasnt feeling well and was in pain but it was just nice for us all to be together and not arguing.

    Thank you all for your continuuing support.

    Theresa xxxx
    There are many things in life that will catch your eye, but only a few will catch your heart...pursue those. --Michael Nolan



    Theresa xxx
  • chris7
    chris7 Bots Posts: 2,696
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Theresa

    Sorry things are still up in the air there and the medics not giving you much help at the moment. Glad the meal went okish, but I hope you don't have another bad night there with the pain. Hang in there, we are still listening.
    take care
    Chris
  • skezier
    skezier Member Posts: 11,333
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Theresa,

    I just echoing Chris here flower.

    I know how hard it gets and well sending you a hope tomorrow will be a good day for you and a (((( )))) Cris xx