knotty hair.

tkachev

My little girl has long, matted hair like a cave girl. She refuses to brush it because it hurts so it just gets worse. Last year we sat at the hairdressers and she was really upset by the pain as they got all the knots out and cut her hair.So she won't go again.
I have managed to get a few knots removed when she is asleep but can only do a tiny section at a time. I have smothered it in conditioner but there are so many knots and it only removes a few because daughter hates having it brushed.
Has anyone any proven methods of moving knots, decent products etc? any advice would be welcome for pain free knot removal.

Elizabeth

dreamdaisy

What are her views on having short hair? That would substantially reduce the knotting problem. DD

elnafinn

Hi Elizabeth

I expect none of this will be new to you but here goes:

Make up your own detangle conditioner as it is cheaper. Fill a spray bottle with water and a few drops of conditioner. It can stay in the bottle for quite a time and will not go "bad". Just shake the bottle each time before use. Children will not like cold water down their neck so put a thick towel around her neck and shoulders.

Start at the bottom of the hair to separate tangles/knots., first by hand and then use an affro or wide toothed comb to detangle the knot, starting underneath and working up the knot. As you get nearer the scalp, hold her head with the spare hand so the hair is not pulled which is most unpleasant as she well knows!

Could you bribe your daughter with some sweets or something she wants to watch on the TV whilst you try to de-knot her hair.

Love
Elna x

tkachev

Hi DD.

I will get it cut shorter but nobody will cut her hair with knots in place as it ruins the cut allegedly.

Elna I will try this.It is like dreadlocks at the moment. The ends are nice but the top, underside is matted.As she resists brushing it is so difficult to get her to sit still.
What do people with dreadlocks do when they change their fashion? Do they just cut it all out.

Thankyou DD and Elna for taking the time to reply. Very much appreciated,

Elizabeth

barbara12

Hi Elizabeth
I have this prob with my 9 yr old GD....once we mange to talk her into a short bob...but it has grown long again and she wont have it cut.
Like you say it becomes a mass of tangles, like Elna say the only way is to try and distract them while you spray on the detangle spray, there was a point when I had to cut some of the tangle out.
Sorry I am not much help
Good Luck
Barbara x

mellman01

Show her a picture of Bob Marley and tell her if she doesn't get it sorted she will end up like that!, well it might work!?
Joking apart the thing is the child is in control here and not you(same happens here some times!), I know it's not easy but the more she gets away with the harder it's going to be to get anything sorted, she might just grow out of it I guess but it's not an easy thing for you to have to deal with so I don't envey you on this one.

tkachev

I am glad to read I am not alone Barbara. She promised to look after it when we took her to the hairdressers last time like she promised to take her movicol when we take her to the GP.But in reality she strops and runs away from any help.If I cut it there won't be much left.
Mell you are correct and she is in control. I would say she is now better behaved overall but thinks she knows best(or dosen't want to admit we know best).
I had a go today with the watered down conditioner while she sat at the laptop and it worked well but there is just too much to untangle. But is better than when I started.

Elizabeth

oneday

Been through this stage with mine when younger. There are products which are good which you spray on when damp, otherwise smoother it with loads of conditioner when youve washed it and brush it through then rinse etc. The main problem is if she gets head lice as it will be impossible to get the nit comb through. A short bob would be easier. Good luck

jean123

For that very reason I have just bought a "tangle teaser" for my granddaughter's Christmas. It is pink and flower shaped, and she keeps her hair decorations in the little pot it comes in. she loved it, and brushed her own hair with it for ages as it was so pain free. They were on sale in my hairdressers, and also in the local Boots and on tinternet. I have the grown up version.

Jean123

roses1

Hi Elizabeth,

I do feel for your little girl, being the owner of very long hair as a child it was very painful!! to have your hair combed. Hair products were not available like they are now.
Dreadlocks, can be combed out /picked out but most opt for growing out / cutting.
spray conditioner (or when just washed and conditioned) comb not brush , start from the bottom in small sections if you can slowly and gently ( so as not to damage shaft) comb up the hair section , from the outside not underside, when you have done 1 section plait that piece so it does not tangle again. then let little one go play for a while, (especially if she has had enough) when complete, and full of plaits she will have wavy hair,(this may appeal to her) comb gently before bed, do 1 large plait to keep most of the hair from knotting. i take it her hair is fine and knots easy.

Short styles, plaits, ponytails, use a good quality bobble not elastic bands, how old is your little one? may be able to advise better.
hope this helps in the meantime x:D

Rose x

lindalegs

Hi Elizabeth,

Have you tried a hairbrush with little bobbles on the end of each 'spike'? These are excellent with tangles - you may still have to tease them out but these hairbrushes are much better than the conventional ones.

tkachev

Thanks ladies.

My daughter is 7. Are you a hairdresser Rose? I want to get her hair cut but she would have to sit still while the knots were taken out so I have to remove the knots first. I thought plaiting hair would make it more likely to knot as she does have very fine hair like me.She didn't let me tie it with a bunchy at night as advised by the previous hairdresser.
I have seen the tangle teaser but didn't know how good it was.
Lucky no lice ever but it had crossed my mind how they would deal with them.
okay I will smother her hair with more conditioner, although that is not popular either! And will definately try the hair mags Tink as this is subtle. You have to do subtle with Lucy.
I have various brushes Linda but her favourite is a baby brush. We have paddle brushes, spikey brushes and a new brush supposed to help with knots.Apart from the baby brush she runs a mile. And combs are her absolute horror.
Many thanks for all the advice and so glad I am not the only one. I am starting to blame myself.
Elizabeth

frogmorton

Elizabeth

poor ppoor you and dont you feel like a bad Mum with all that going on? I certainly did x:( ( I have three girls and they did get lice from time to time too x:( )

My eldest Charlie has hair like a lion's mane it is very very thick and long and tight waves.

I tried everything and l mean everything this is not your fault x:(

I dont think I solved it either....l tried eveything on the market and every brush I could buy. the only real solution was brushing form the end upwards rather than top down, but really the answer was.....

NOW at 15 she wants to look better so she does it herself.

Good luck

Love

toni xx

tkachev

I am hoping that day will come sooner rather than later Toni.She loves girlie things as well.

Elizabeth

frogmorton

If she is a girlie girl there is hope then!!

they make you feel you are so crule don't they? x:roll:

good luck

Lofve

toni xx

mellman01

How about Imac!? x

PamieAFC1903

My hair used to knot alot. So what my mum did was get my hair layered. ever since then my hair has been fine.

Found out the knotting was due to my hair being one length and cause I toss and turn in bed.... another way of knotting is not blow drying your hair because as it dries and then tangles.

When combing it use a wide toothed comb and/or a paddle brush as the softness of the brush will take away pain.

I've used hair extensions and got knots in them too, and using the paddle brush really helped alot.

cthornley

I've had long fine hair for almost 29 years now so I completely understand the tangle trauma
Sounds like she's worked herself up to a bit of a minor phobia which makes it all a bit more difficult than it probably should be
In my opinion I don't think the baby brush is actually helping....as it won't really remove tangles and is lulling her in to a false sense of security...perhaps you should bite the bullet, get rid of it (emphasise she's no longer a baby so she doesn't need a baby brush) and go on a brush buying exercise for a 'grown up brush'...then have a go with everybody's suggested detangling solutions - I think the initial big detangle will be a not great exercise but possibly make it a rewardable event (my hyper 2yr old gets chocolate coins for sitting still for his hair cut which I do in front of his fav film...only way to keep him still for so long), and break it up into sections....for particularly stubborn knots try rubbing with a small drop of something like frizz ease serum which will help ease it.
Its then a battle to keep in knot free
Loose plaits whilst sleeping may help but ensure you use large not fine bands and try to get seamless ones as they can catch and cause more tangles....I don't know if they still exist but I always wore mine in a satin scrunchie at that age and that wasn't too bad.....I've also been told that a satin pillowcase helps to reduces tangling but I've never tried it
Can I recommend that you don't go for a shampoo or conditioner like pantene as they contain silicon which can make hair more static over a period of time which won't help with tangles
Hope that helps and good luck
Chrissie

tkachev

More great advice thank you. Well I had a go today, washed, conditioned and sectioned the hair and got some knots out but then had to give in as I had pulled and hurt too many times for her liking.However the shampoo and conditioner did help soften her hair. She doesn't like hair washing but is getting more used to it now.
I was actually planning on layers for her next hair cut. Then it looks longer but has some shorter bits.
Funnily enough I have some immac but she wouldn't like the smell Mell.

Elizabeth