Wish Me Luck Please?

elainebadknee
elainebadknee Bots Posts: 3,703
edited 15. Mar 2011, 07:36 in Living with Arthritis archive
Hi Everyone

I would really appreciate it if I could have some virtual support on monday morning as Im off to Wigan to see an orthopedic consultant again. I have to leave at 07.20 in the morning for my 08.45 appointment.
At the moment i dont know if Im going on my own as my sister has been taken really ill up in Inverness and has all kinds of infections after getting cellulitis and now kidney damage. My folks are being updated daily and as we live in cumbria they are not within easy distance of her and family.
My appointment Im going to ask questions as have seen this bloke before and previously he dismissed me for TKR saying i was too young (42) and too overweight (im on course for that, have lost some pounds already).....Ive got lots of things to ask him, to appeal to him to empahsise how much my quality of life has wavered away in the last year and a half....My heads spinning, dont know where to start and know that even if i have a perfect plan in my head it can all go awry in an instance...
I also feel bad for wanting support too when my sister is ill...I want to go and see her too and wish could cancel my appointment but I cant really.....If i go on my own will be nervous as have been on me tod before and it didnt go to plan, think it was my nerves that played a big part in that....
Anyhow, sorry im blabbering away (WHACK,SLAP)....Anyone who can give virtual support be fab.......

Elainex
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Comments

  • barbara12
    barbara12 Member Posts: 21,281
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Elaine
    We will be there for you, wish your appointment was later, I would have met you there and come in with you, but I would never make it for that time.
    I know what you mean about being nervous, last time I went I was the same , just take your time keep your questions with you, I have noticed how they try and rush you, dont let them.
    Sorry Im not being much help, but at least you have been before so you will be ready for them.
    Good Luck with it all
    Love
    Barbara x
    Love
    Barbara
  • rugbygirl
    rugbygirl Member Posts: 691
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    I will be there for pocket support dont worry about that. We would never leave anyone without support even if its only virtual. Will be thinking of you until I hear how things went.

    Fingers crossed that you get the answers you want.

    As for wanting support at this time, why shouldnt you have support. I realise your sister is going through a tough time at the moment but so are you and you need to be looked after just as much. Its frustrating when these things happen. Just know that you will be thought about.
    Jakib0644.gif
  • paddyw
    paddyw Member Posts: 93
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Elaine, Try writing everthing down you need to know ,and at the bottom of your list ."I KNOW I CAN DO THIS I BELIVE IN MY -SELF".wish you all the luck will be thinking about you , let us know how it went hon.Pat
  • madwestie
    madwestie Member Posts: 383
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Elaine,
    I will be send you Virtual support on Monday and am available to poke you from yor pocket if needed.
    Pat is right about writing down the things you really want answers for so you don't get nerous and forget them.
    I also agree with Jacki you are not being selfish your sister is ill but so are you if it was the other way round you wouldn't think you sister was selfish for wanting support would you. don't be too hard on yourself we all need support sometimes.

    Take Care
    Tracey
  • need me bed
    need me bed Member Posts: 103
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    I shall be stretching out somewhere in ur hand bag mate

    Good Luck. Wishing your poor sis a speedy recovery also

    xx
    f055.gif

    There is no snooze button on a cat who wants breakfast.
  • jillyb1
    jillyb1 Member Posts: 1,725
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Will be with you on monday for virtual pocket duty ; be sure to keep us all up dated on how it goes . Jillyb
  • lindalegs
    lindalegs Member Posts: 5,395
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    I'll be thinking about you too Elaine - I hope it goes well this time. :smile:
    Love, Legs x
    'Make a life out of what you have, not what you're missing'
  • valval
    valval Member Posts: 14,911
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    first we pay there wages so try not to get intimidated of course you want to be there for your sister but she will understand write a list give it to him to read if you do not feel up to asking. put down how much weight you have lost how you are taking steps to exercise it will all help to convince him you do need to improve your quality of life so will be with you sending out positive thoughts good luck val
    val
  • tiggernut
    tiggernut Member Posts: 339
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Elaine,
    You have my support and I can relate. I live on the Isle of wight and was in a lot of pain, one leg in vulgus position and was told I was too young at 44. I then changed my rhumatologist (so different surgeon)and went to Bath and I got a totally different attitude from the surgeon, he said well you need a knew knee and you need it now. So I had them both done in 1998 one in July the other in Nov. So, my point is if they still say no go back to your Doctor and ask if you can go somewhere else for a second opinion.
    It's all very well them saying you are to young but they don't have to live with it.
    Okay I'll get off my soap box now!!
    Good luck hope to hear good news fron you Monday.
    Hope your sister gets better soon.
    Anita.
  • speedalong
    speedalong Member Posts: 3,315
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Elaine, write yourself clear bullet points and read them out if necessary at your appointment. If the consultant says anything you don't catch/understand ask him to repeat/explain what he has said. Good luck.

    Speedy
    I have had OA since mid twenties. It affects my hips and knees. I had a THR on the left aged 30 and now have a resurface-replacement on the right - done May 2010.
  • bobbyger
    bobbyger Member Posts: 155
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Good luck for tomorrow, I'll be the one in your pocket with the big blue cast on.
  • Poppyg1rl
    Poppyg1rl Member Posts: 1,245
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Elaine,
    Good luck for Monday, hope everything goes the way you want it to. Thinking of you Poppy X
    'grá agus solas'
    'Love and Light' translated from Irish. X
  • elainebadknee
    elainebadknee Bots Posts: 3,703
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Barbara

    Well yes I know and honestly thanks for previous offer....I think he has put me in before his surgery, its not really a consultation but answer to my emails i sent pointing out differencing things....
    I think maybe my dad can come, he is accompanying me then going to scotland later, about 1 in afternoon...So between us maybe we can get a few answers, information and not be rushed.....
    Still nervous as hell..

    Elainex
    barbara12 wrote:
    Hi Elaine
    We will be there for you, wish your appointment was later, I would have met you there and come in with you, but I would never make it for that time.
    I know what you mean about being nervous, last time I went I was the same , just take your time keep your questions with you, I have noticed how they try and rush you, dont let them.
    Sorry Im not being much help, but at least you have been before so you will be ready for them.
    Good Luck with it all
    Love
    Barbara x
  • elainebadknee
    elainebadknee Bots Posts: 3,703
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Jaki

    Thanks for pcoket duty tomorrow, all dwellers are most welcome really....Im not sure what i will get if it will be answers, but i will try my best to get some across.....
    I do still feel bad that im sort of getting support before my sister, we get daily updates how she is, one day is a virus, next day its not...Nothings clear...

    Elainex
    rugbygirl wrote:
    I will be there for pocket support dont worry about that. We would never leave anyone without support even if its only virtual. Will be thinking of you until I hear how things went.

    Fingers crossed that you get the answers you want.

    As for wanting support at this time, why shouldnt you have support. I realise your sister is going through a tough time at the moment but so are you and you need to be looked after just as much. Its frustrating when these things happen. Just know that you will be thought about.
  • elainebadknee
    elainebadknee Bots Posts: 3,703
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Pat

    Well yes i know i need some of that stellar spirit if i can.....I have notes, emails printed out and just hope im given an opportunity to be heard and be taken seriously........
    Thanks for good luck and thoughtss....

    Elainex
    paddyw wrote:
    Hi Elaine, Try writing everthing down you need to know ,and at the bottom of your list ."I KNOW I CAN DO THIS I BELIVE IN MY -SELF".wish you all the luck will be thinking about you , let us know how it went hon.Pat
  • elainebadknee
    elainebadknee Bots Posts: 3,703
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Tracey

    Thanks for your virtual support tomorrow, i really to appreciate pokes n all!
    Nerves will play a big part, hope can calm them down and be composed and not come across as neurotic....
    I do feel bad about my sister, my folks leave tomorrow and cos ive got to attend llearn direct, fill in ESA form i cant go....Plus its too expensive for me in petrol, the more i say the more selfish i sound dont i?

    Elainex
    madwestie wrote:
    Elaine,
    I will be send you Virtual support on Monday and am available to poke you from yor pocket if needed.
    Pat is right about writing down the things you really want answers for so you don't get nerous and forget them.
    I also agree with Jacki you are not being selfish your sister is ill but so are you if it was the other way round you wouldn't think you sister was selfish for wanting support would you. don't be too hard on yourself we all need support sometimes.

    Take Care
    Tracey
  • elainebadknee
    elainebadknee Bots Posts: 3,703
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi NMB

    I will make space for you in my bag then, in amongst my mobile and Sol the Beany Frog.....

    Thanks, lots

    Elainex
    I shall be stretching out somewhere in ur hand bag mate

    Good Luck. Wishing your poor sis a speedy recovery also

    xx
  • elainebadknee
    elainebadknee Bots Posts: 3,703
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Jillyb

    Thanks for virtual pocket duty, its really appreciated...I will update later tomorrow..

    Elainex
    jillyb1 wrote:
    Will be with you on monday for virtual pocket duty ; be sure to keep us all up dated on how it goes . Jillyb
  • elainebadknee
    elainebadknee Bots Posts: 3,703
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Legs

    Thanks for your thoughts...I hope it goes better this time too...will try and cross all digits...

    Elainex
    lindalegs wrote:
    I'll be thinking about you too Elaine - I hope it goes well this time. :smile:
  • elainebadknee
    elainebadknee Bots Posts: 3,703
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Val

    Wel yes youre right we do pay their wages but sometimes they make you feel like paupers dont they? I hopefully will have backup which does give me tremendous support.....My ICAS advisor told me to be as emotional as i wanted to be as well.....

    Thanks for positive thoughts and good luck...

    Elainex
    valval wrote:
    first we pay there wages so try not to get intimidated of course you want to be there for your sister but she will understand write a list give it to him to read if you do not feel up to asking. put down how much weight you have lost how you are taking steps to exercise it will all help to convince him you do need to improve your quality of life so will be with you sending out positive thoughts good luck val
  • elainebadknee
    elainebadknee Bots Posts: 3,703
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Anita

    Well isnt it weird how they go on about age i mean surely if ones quality of likfe is restricted then thats what matters? I can see their points but sometimes dont get how they can be so rigid in their decisions....
    This man was my second opinion and my fear is if i seek another opinion im going to be seen as awkward of untreatable....I just want my mobility or part of it back...
    Thanks for soap box talking to..

    Elainex
    tiggernut wrote:
    Hi Elaine,
    You have my support and I can relate. I live on the Isle of wight and was in a lot of pain, one leg in vulgus position and was told I was too young at 44. I then changed my rhumatologist (so different surgeon)and went to Bath and I got a totally different attitude from the surgeon, he said well you need a knew knee and you need it now. So I had them both done in 1998 one in July the other in Nov. So, my point is if they still say no go back to your Doctor and ask if you can go somewhere else for a second opinion.
    It's all very well them saying you are to young but they don't have to live with it.
    Okay I'll get off my soap box now!!
    Good luck hope to hear good news fron you Monday.
    Hope your sister gets better soon.
    Anita.
  • elainebadknee
    elainebadknee Bots Posts: 3,703
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi speedy

    I am going to try my hardest thats all i can do....I think (and okay im slightly blowing me own hornet) but that ive fought to go this far and deserve some honest answers and decent treatment/advice...

    Elainex
    speedalong wrote:
    Hi Elaine, write yourself clear bullet points and read them out if necessary at your appointment. If the consultant says anything you don't catch/understand ask him to repeat/explain what he has said. Good luck.

    Speedy
  • elainebadknee
    elainebadknee Bots Posts: 3,703
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hey Bobby Blue Cast (BBC) Lol...

    Thanks for pocket duty and good luck too..

    Elainex

    bobbyger wrote:
    Good luck for tomorrow, I'll be the one in your pocket with the big blue cast on.
  • elainebadknee
    elainebadknee Bots Posts: 3,703
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Poppy

    Aw thanks a lot for your kind thoughts...

    Elainex
    Poppyg1rl wrote:
    Hi Elaine,
    Good luck for Monday, hope everything goes the way you want it to. Thinking of you Poppy X
  • tkachev
    tkachev Member Posts: 8,332
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    dear Elaine I will be with you on Monday. If possible get there a little bit early and get all the tears out before hand so you feel more composed when you go yo speak to him(I am actually the worlds worse cryer, I could make a living out of it as everything sets me off) and this is what I have to do if i feel the tears coming as it can be embarrassing.
    There is no guarantee he will listen to you as he may be' just that sort of bloke' but I hope he does see how your quality of life has been so badly affected and how a knee operation would hope you so much. I hope he praises you for making the effort by starting to lose weight, again no guarantee because he' might be that sort of bloke'. Just don't take it personally Elaine and concerntrate on the medical side of things.

    Deep breath Elaine and best wishes
    Elizabeth
    Never be bullied into silence.
    Never allow yourself to be made a victim.
    Accept no ones definition of your life

    Define yourself........

    Harvey Fierstein