Turned a corner.

tkachev

My little girl has now turned a corner and is taking meds regularly and has put on 2 pounds in weight in the past few weeks. She has been stuck at 3 stone for years. Her aches and pains seem to have ceased too. She is increasing in confidence and happiness and has not missed any school ,apart from the counselling but that has now finished. I am finding life so much easier with less washing and less stress.
I just wanted to thank you all for giving me such good advice and not judging me. One thing that came up in counselling was I am over' kind 'to my children because of all the cr*p I went through during a divorce, things that ex said to me concerning the children and a long hard fight to stop him taking them from me.
Thanks for those who gave valuable advice through pm's too.
She even brushes her hair!

Elizabeth

robertls

Well done Elizabeth.....

and long may it continue for you.....

coco67

Elizabeth
that is fantastic news (i dont know all of what has gone on but i know youve had a tough time one way or another) im so pleased this corner has been negociated, the next one will be turned soon also, and your little one is making progress, may it continue and a happy little lady you shall have, making a happy mummy too you fort hard for your kids and they will appreciate that as they grow older and understand, im getting there now with mine (we had to flee, lost everything and went through hell) believe me the rewards are amazining, my older daughter said to her boss (a family friend) that i was her rock and because of that rock she can build a life and future, made me cry. well done be proud xxx little steps added together make a long walk.

tkachev

Thank you Rob and Coco. A lot of the things connected to the divorce knocked my confidence so I have gone easy on the children but they have taken advantage. With my daughter i thought I was failing, her problems were all my fault, but I have been helped to look at it from a different angle.My older girls are lovely so I couldn't have been such a bad mum but you need to be made aware of this.Sorry but i took a real pasting through my divorce!

I am glad you got through the bad times Coco and have been rewarded with the love of your children.

Elizabeth

tkachev

Thanks Tink. Just missed your post.

Elizabeth

coco67

Elizabeth,
you will be rewarded too. now could you tell me where the manual is for being a perfect parent, thats right THERE AINT ONE, we all get things wrong its human nature, im sure you have done the best you can and that is all we can do. im glad the councilling has helped, your a good caring mum who does her best and has taken advice when things not working no mater how hard the advice is to swollow, that shows a mum who loves her children and wants the best for them, we all beat our self up and wish things had been different, what youve done has obviously worked and now your seeing the results starting to come through, Divorce is hell, no matter how you part, good terms or bad, you get through it as best as you can, well done your a suviver and so are your kids. things will get better and never doubt your being a good mum, just remember your human too and kids dont come with a manual or we'd all be experts

tkachev

Thank you Coco that is so sweet. My divorce was with my 2 older girls. It was a revelation to be told that as they had turned out so well and loved me lots then I couldn't have been such a bad a mum after all. I knew I was weak but to look at some possible reasons behind it was also a revelation. She (counciller)may have been buttering me up but it was clever and made me think positively.
Arthritis is a struggle at the bes of times without all these other obstacles.

Elizabeth

coco67

buttering you up? nope just pure and simple honesty, kind words can sometimes be harder to accept than harsh ones, esspecially when harsh is what your used to.

weak, nope.. tired worn down and fragile maybe( we all get there some times), you fort hard for your kids, thats not a weak woman to me.

and your right athur is a struggle, he bites hard and drains you making everything else in life harder to deal with, he is a cruel lodger and one we'd all like to be rid off. you get up in the mornings and look in the mirror, remind yourself that the lady looking back at you is, A survivor who is NOT weak just a bit tired and worn some days and most of all YOUR A GOOD MUM. do that every day and one day you wont need to because you will feel it and believe it, and you are. {{{{{hugs}}}}

dachshund

Hi Elizabeth
i'm pleased you have turned the corner. ihope now you will be on the straight path.
you are a lovely mother and you have your problems with arther and i think you have done a good job your children love you and they are happy so you are doing a good job.
take care. joan xx

dreamdaisy

Oh tkachev, I am so pleased to hear this news. Well done to you and good for your little one. Life can be a struggle no matter what one's age and I hope things continue to get better for you both. I remember Rob posting on the hair thread about sorting out his grand-daughter's thatch(after years of practising on spaniels ears!) and I can still see that mental picture. DD

elnafinn

Way hay, super mum

Sooooooooo happy to hear your news, Elizabeth. Lucy has found her way with such a lot of help and patience, to the point of exhaustion from you and outside help too. So pleased for her and you must be on cloud 9. It makes all the difference to have a much happier child in the fold doesn't it. One great weight must have been lifted from your shoulders. You must be feeling so proud of yourself and Lucy and so you should be.

Love
Elna x

joanlawson

Hi Elizabeth

I'm so pleased that things are going well for you and Lucy now. I'm full of admiration for you, and I think you are doing a great job.

Joan

tkachev

Thank you Joan Joan, DD and Elna.

I am exhausted (still have the boys to deal with)but it does make things a little easier all round.

Thanks again
Elizabeth

Poppyg1rl

Oh Elizabeth I am so happy for you, I know you went through a bad patch with your little girl, but things are on the up and as others have said you did the best you could, and you are a brilliant Mum, your elder 2 girls prove it! Divorce and all it entails is hard, having arthritis and raising children is incredibly hard :shock: you and your children have come out the other side stronger and together.
You are a brilliant Mum, a lovely person and I'm sure you're children are proud of you. Hugs xxx

julie47

Elizabeth that is lovely news,

I am glad that everything is gooing well for you and your little girl.

take care
juliepf x

tkachev

Thank you Poppy and Julie. I'm feeling more encouraged after all these nice comments. Lindalegs has said it is how good a mum I think I am that matters.I couldn't have done it myself though, I tried,but I am so relieved she is better and everything else is falling into place.


Elizabeth

lindalegs

Sorry Elizabeth only just to have caught up with your Thread and thank you for that.

We all know you're a good Mum, it just took your daughter to prove it and you to believe it. Keep on believing it!

Well done