If only.....

julie47
julie47 Member Posts: 6,041
edited 11. Apr 2011, 08:28 in Living with Arthritis archive
Hi guys

You know......It was our anniversary yesterday 27 yrs., as you know I have just seen my daughter married , my stump has healed over now and looks quite healthy, I feel not too bad and IF Only i hadn't got the operations on my neck looming i would be the happiest bunny around.
I wait every day now for the dreaded appointment to see the surgeoon some time iin may to disguss when it is going to happen.
Doesn't life suck sometimes.......sorry just had to tell you....told oh last night and with tears in his eyes he just gave me a big hug.
Just feel a little (ok a lot) scared.

Hope you are all ok
Juliepf x

Comments

  • dreamdaisy
    dreamdaisy Member Posts: 31,520
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Oh hon, I am so sorry. I wish there was something I could say or do, it is a tough time that you are facing and now, without the wedding to think about, it HAS to be faced. But not just yet, not quite now.

    Is it the uncertainty that is causing the wobbles? There must be so many questions whizzing around your mind not only about the op but about the very necessary practicalities re your leg, the nurses moving you about, what will they actually do to you? :shock: This is the worst bit perhaps, the waiting and wondering, and not being to talk to anyone who knows about it apart from the surgeon and he isn't sitting there with a cuppa and a biccy or two. He should be, but he ain't! You don't know when you are going to see him so how's about ringing the hospital today to ask if there is any news? Would that help or make things worse? DD
    Have you got the despatches? No, I always walk like this. Eddie Braben
  • constable
    constable Member Posts: 2,115
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi there,

    It is perfectly understandable in the way you are feeling. As already said you had your daughter's wedding to keep your mind more occupied, now you have all the time to think on what is to happen next.

    I wish I had a magic wand and make everything good for you but all I can do is say that we are all with you and I am sending you big hugs.

    Karen xx
    Karen xx
  • skezier
    skezier Member Posts: 11,333
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Julie,

    Firstly belated happy anniversary :grin:

    Secondly a ((((( ))))) and a cuppa and a promise what your feeling is totally natural. Any op is a bit daunting but when it comes to necks and backs they seem more so cus of the impact should it go wrong.

    I can tell you its gong to be fine, they will take good care of you etc but really that doesn't help but I do know it will make a huge difference to you flower once its done and it will stop some of what is going wrong for you now and hold off future problems.

    I know they are getting back to you soon and once they have it will get easier cus its easier to wait fr a date you know than a date you don't if that makes sense.

    Its big surgery cus its your neck but they really do know what they are dong and they really will take care of you flower. leaving another ((((( ))))) and a cuppa. love Cris xx
  • Poppyg1rl
    Poppyg1rl Member Posts: 1,245
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Julie,
    A happy anniversary from me, 27 years! It'll be our 18th in Nov and I don't know about you but doesn't it seem like yesterday? :grin: with your daughter getting married recently and all that entails, it is exciting and time consuming, and as the others have pointed out it kept you busy and your mind from dwelling on the operations coming up.
    But Julie, you've come through so much, with your stump healing etc, you're always offering support and good advice to everyone :smile: as Cris says we can tell you it will be alright, you'll be looked after etc, but it is completely natural for you to worry.
    Try and rest and relax after what must have been a very busy time for you, enjoy today and worry about tomorrow, tomorrow.
    Sending buckets of hugs your way Xxx
    'grá agus solas'
    'Love and Light' translated from Irish. X
  • frogmorton
    frogmorton Member Posts: 29,837
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Julie

    oh bless you...you have had such a rough time of late....l am so sorry that you have such a scary opp ahead and Julie.....l would be a tad scared too.

    I was when l had my back opp too......luckily l was told on teh friday that l would be in on the MOnday so....not too much time to bottle it. For you it has been festering and worrrying you behind all the loveliness of the last week.

    I TOATLLY get it.

    Any chance you could find out when? Best once you know maybe so you don't dread the post?

    Love and hugs

    Toni xx :sad:
  • julie47
    julie47 Member Posts: 6,041
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Thankyou for your replies....I dare not ring i am sorry...Guess with easter coming there may be a few delays in posting out apps anyway eh?
    It is just you would think if he requested to see me in may I would get one soon.
    When I have a date to see him and have had all my questions answered (after blubbering at his replies :lol: ) I will be a little better.

    Toni that is what i would like too.....ring friday to go in monday...that happened to mil when she had her knee replaced....no time to think.

    dd karen cris poppy tony.....thank you have a lovely weekend and i hope the weather stays nice

    juliepf x
  • barbara12
    barbara12 Member Posts: 21,281
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Julie
    A belated HAPPY ANNIVERSARY from me, it really will do you good to talk to us lot...sometimes it can be hard to talk to family, not because they dont want you to, but because you feel has tho you are putting the burden on them.
    We are all here for you, the waiting game is the worse I suppose , when that letter comes we will all jump in your pocket and come with you.
    Sending you loads of hugs (((((()))))
    and love
    Barbara xx
    Love
    Barbara
  • chris7
    chris7 Bots Posts: 2,696
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Julie

    Belated anniversary wishes from me too. :grin: Sorry you are getting the wobbles there, but am glad you felt able to post about it. I do understand scared lovey so hope you can at least be as prepared as you can when the time comes. Hope today has been a little brighter for you.
    take care, soothing hugs ((( )))
    love
    Chris
  • caterina57
    caterina57 Member Posts: 1,424
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Sorry, my late night to work ... Belated happy anniversary, 27 years Wow! I can understand how worried you feel and how this worry is going to consume your thoughts ... but it will be fine... and I WILL be there in your pocket any time you need and will even peek out and hold your hand...Promise
    Cath
  • skezier
    skezier Member Posts: 11,333
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Julie,

    Just leaving you a pile of (((((((((( ))))))))) and hopes your have a good day and can shove the op to the back of your brain till it's needed to come forward again.

    You really will be ok. Love Cris xxx
  • tjt6768
    tjt6768 Member Posts: 12,170
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    My dear friend Julie.. I hope I don't hadn't to day but I'll certainly be on pocket duties on the day hun..

    I understand the worry, it is only natural.

    We are all here for you as ever :grin:
    e050.gifMe-Tony
    n035.gifRa-1996 -2013 RIP...
    k040.gif
    Cleo - 1996 to 2011. RIP
  • julie47
    julie47 Member Posts: 6,041
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    To all you lovely people who have given me advice and offered pocket duty , I am so grateful. When i go see the surgeon I will be imagining all your lovely faces looking up at me from my pocket, prompting me of all the questions I need to ask :smile:

    But when I eventually go for the op you may all have to hold me down for tthe surgeon :lol: I will be wanting to escape :lol:

    I am so glad I found this forum and I said that to OH yesterday, You have always been so supportive , it is lovely to be able to tell you all how i feel.
    I can never thank you enough.

    I hope you all enjoy the weekend and that the sunshine lasts.....oh and mtx peeps dont forget the sun block :grin:

    (((((((((())))))))))) big group hug
    Juliepf x
  • frogmorton
    frogmorton Member Posts: 29,837
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Julie

    I may be the best to hold you down as l have actually 'escaped' three times from the hospital.....they drugged me for my back as all the escaping had been done before then and it's on my NOTES :shock: :oops:

    Serioulsy l get it and will be with you 100%

    YOU enjoy the sun too Julie

    t4624.gif

    this is really a lovely place

    Toni xx
  • elainebadknee
    elainebadknee Bots Posts: 3,703
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Julie

    I read your post and i dont know what youre having done with your neck (for that i feel a bit guilty, not knowing)...
    But the overall message of your happiness and your oh's support, your daughter married and stump behaving is very heartening and lovely. I mean life can suck and can be hard but if you have folk around you that love and support you it makes it seem quite not to bad to have a hand to squeeze for comfort!!

    Good luck Julie...

    Love Elainex
    julie47 wrote:
    Hi guys

    You know......It was our anniversary yesterday 27 yrs., as you know I have just seen my daughter married , my stump has healed over now and looks quite healthy, I feel not too bad and IF Only i hadn't got the operations on my neck looming i would be the happiest bunny around.
    I wait every day now for the dreaded appointment to see the surgeoon some time iin may to disguss when it is going to happen.
    Doesn't life suck sometimes.......sorry just had to tell you....told oh last night and with tears in his eyes he just gave me a big hug.
    Just feel a little (ok a lot) scared.

    Hope you are all ok
    Juliepf x
  • bubbadog
    bubbadog Member Posts: 5,544
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Julie, I feel abit stupid as I obviously don't know nothing about you, but you sound a lovely woman, and I feel for what you have been through and what you are going through now!
    I wanted to send my love and a big hug to you.
  • ironic
    ironic Member Posts: 2,361
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Julie,
    I am so sorry you have all this stress on you. It is awful waiting for appointments I know it grinds you down. All you can do is take one day at time but you know that. The weather is lovely this weekend so I hope the warmth helps a little. Have you got the photos altogether yet? Maybe you could sort through them to go into the memory box with pressed flowers etc for your lovely daughter.
    Hang on in there Julie, we are all with you and will be sending good vibes and warmest thoughts to get you through this.
    Gentle hugs,
    Lv, Ix
  • ratface
    ratface Member Posts: 62
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Julie,

    You could try going through the back door to find out the date if you haven't tried already.

    Try ringing the appointment department at your hospital - they may have an appointment booked for you which you haven't been notified of yet. (Sometimes hospital correspondence is like a snail trail) Or, try ringing the secretary to the specialist that you will be under. Give them a 'cock and bull story' something along the lines of "you are thinking of booking a holiday and need to know the date" or that you are worrying and need a bit of advice. (Spoke to my specialists sec and the holiday one worked for me when I was waiting to hear about an impending op date).

    At least you will have tried, may be you will get an answer, may be not but you will pass on the message to them that you are worrying, and that it's not a good place to be.

    Hope this helps.

    Ratface xxxx
  • skezier
    skezier Member Posts: 11,333
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Julie,

    Flower you know I would have it for you if I could :wink: Just leaving a bucket of strength, stamina and another one of love and a hug bucket that will leap out and hug you when ever you need.

    Its hard to wait and even harder when you don't want them to tell you. I just want you to know all of us are also waiting with you and will be there come what may and you are going to be ok flower you rally are./ Hugs from the bucket to check its working.... seems to be. Cris xxx
  • lindalegs
    lindalegs Member Posts: 5,395
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Julie,

    Sorry to have only just caught up with your thread :oops:

    I think sometimes it's being in limbo when we can't focus on a date that's the most difficult thing to deal with. This is my case with my forthcoming op looming on the horizon which I, too, am dreading. :sad:

    Do you suppose there's any chance we can have our surgery done at the same time and we could hold hands and be brave for one another? :grin:
    Love, Legs x
    'Make a life out of what you have, not what you're missing'
  • skezier
    skezier Member Posts: 11,333
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Legs you going to be fine too and shall be welded in your pocket for that one to. Love and a (((((((((( ))))))))))) cris who really has to get moving so please kick her xx
  • lindalegs
    lindalegs Member Posts: 5,395
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    skezier wrote:
    Legs you going to be fine too and shall be welded in your pocket for that one to. Love and a (((((((((( ))))))))))) cris who really has to get moving so please kick her xx



    One size 7 heading up your jacksy now!!!!!

    [Thanks Cris ((((( ))))))) ]
    Love, Legs x
    'Make a life out of what you have, not what you're missing'
  • julie47
    julie47 Member Posts: 6,041
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    I am overwhelmed by your replies thankyou.

    Toni you got the job then of holding me down

    you may have to hold lindalegs too as we are going together :lol:

    skezier I know you would have the surgery for me, you wanted this op so badly and I am so sorry that your hospital is so cr**.
    When I go to have my discussion I will ask him if he can do you too :smile:

    To all the other people who have left me a message thankyou,

    Had a good day in this lovely sunshine.... been round a race course (not on a horse no) on my scooter.....was a bit bumpy and not good for neck but hey my oh and I had a good time.....took picnic and sat by a pond.
    Hope you all had a good day too......Resting now.
    Juliepf x
  • frogmorton
    frogmorton Member Posts: 29,837
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Julie

    (and Legs)

    l will hold you BOTH down (got the lumphammer just incase)

    and you will both be fine and WAY braver than either of you expect :wink:

    Love

    Toni xx