When your carer needs care

woodbon

Hi, I've been a bit stressed recently - my lovely husband, Jerry, has had to have a mole removed from his face. All this happened very quickly from seeing the GP to remolval for biopsy. He has had the mole for a long, long time but it became infected, which can mean it's changing. So the GP fast tracked the tests.

The specialist who we saw at the hospital thinks it is just a mole that became infected, but he wanted to be sure, so he arranged a quick surgical proceedure that took half an hour. Although to me, waiting it felt more like 4 hours! All went well and the surgeon also thinks it should be OK and only a mole which isn't cancerous. My mind had been taking me through that road and I'd been so worried. Yesterday I spent the afternoon asleep and I felt very nervous before hand. At that point I would have gladly gone through the op myself!

We are now waiting for the result of the biopsy and I will just relax and take each step as it comes. I do feel a lot better now the op is over. Jerry says it was, after the injections, quite painless, although tonight a bit of bruising is coming out and it is a bit uncomfortable.

All this has shown me the stress that a loved one goes through when a medical problem occurs, all the thoughts and worries about what could, but hopefully won't lie ahead. I now know just how lucky I am to have such a strong supporter in Jerry and the pain of waiting when you can do nothing. Sorry to take so much space to tell you this and its not strictly an arthritis story, although in a way, of course if is. Love Sue

tweedie

Hi Sue,
Just want to agree with you , I think it is much easier to be the patient than the carer , my own husband has had nearly 20 yrs of watching me battle with arthritis, operations and the adjustment of becoming disabled , he was and is my rock ---- like you my rock has had his own major health problems and the helplessness you feel is far far worse than any pain I have . His own heath suffers when he is in hospital away from me because he worries I may fall or need his help , it makes you feel very humble , but also it can make you stronger.
Hope all your worries and fears are unfounded and that your husband soon recovers.
Joanna
xxxxxx

bubbles

Hi Sue, Sending hugs to you and to your OH for a speedy recovery. I am sure things will be ok with the biopsy, the surgeons know their stuff pretty well. Easy to say, but don't worry about the results, rich, coming from the worlds worst worry pot.

I often think of the what if's and how my disability has affected my OH, just simple things like him not being able to walk at his own pace, watching what I am doing. We have a very good local carers association here and you can talk to them and they offer support, days out for carers and other activities. That said, my OH won't go, as he won't leave me :roll:

I am, like you, so lucky to have a strong OH, level headed and well organised, seeing as I am away with the fairies half the time.

XX Bubbles

julie47

Hi sue
I have replied on your other thread, but thought I would let you know on this one too, I am thinking of both you and your husband and I hope the results come back quickly with good news.
Take care
Juliepf x

prefabkid47

Hi Sue
I was really moved by the sentiments of your posting.Really hope everything works out ok for you both.

Ron

barbara12

Hi Sue
This plays on my mind alot, because I do rely on my OH, I start thinking will family help out...or could we help one another.
I suppose when these things happen then we have to face up to then, and take things day by day.
But I really do wish you and your OH well, and hopefully the results will be good.
Sending you lots of hugs (((((())) and love
Barbara xx

frogmorton

'taking up space'?!

TAKING UP SPACE!!!!

Sue l totally get what you have said and bless Jerry and all the other wonderful OHs on here for all they do for us

Thank you for taking the time to write it down and....

l am certain he will be just fine

Love

|Toni xx

speedalong

Hi Sue, hope your lovely OH is feeling better soon.

Speedy

woodbon

Thank you very much for the good wishes, Jerry has his dressing off now and it looks good at the moment. Now I'm worried about the test results, I think we will be better when either we know that thiers nothing wrong or that he has something to fight. At the moment its slightly like the elephant in the room, I know he doen't like talking about it, so I try to ignore it and it works most of the time.

I feel like a drama queen, writting all this down, but it does me good to get rid of it and not to have to 'brood' all day! I know some of you have been through much worse situations and that makes me feel ashamed. Thank you, Love Suexxx
We do seem to be going from one crisis to another this year!

barbara12

Gosh Sue
Please dont apologize for your post, you and OH have a lot of worry at the min, so if telling us lot helps, then that make me feel better.
Good Luck with everything, and let us know how the results are.
Lots of love
Barbara xx