Grief?

margareth64
margareth64 Member Posts: 148
edited 30. Apr 2011, 18:26 in Community Chit-chat archive
Hi everyone just wondering can grief make our arthritis feel worse? The reason I ask I lost my lovely mum in law on 14th april very suddenly it was her birthday and the day she was due to leave hospital to come home. She had been in hospital since 11th dec with heart infection and fluid on her lungs, then her kidneys started to fail and she had dialysis 3 days a week. She was fighting her way back and was getting stronger and we had put rails up at her house and arranged for meals and everything to be delivered. She was getting pains in her back, during dialysis on tue 11th the nurses were worried. The doc sent her for a MRI and then they saw she had a torn aortic valve and there was nothing they could do.She lasted till thurs. Very distressing for us all. For about 4 days I was like a zombie felt no pain and then i woke up on friday past in agony? Is this common?
Margaret

Comments

  • jillyb1
    jillyb1 Member Posts: 1,725
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    So very sorry to hear your sad news ; in answer to your question , I would say that the stress and grief of losing someone you loved so much will definitely make the physical pain worse . Really rest and take care of YOU for the next few weeks ; and remember to check in on the forum when you need to chat . Jillyb
  • coco67
    coco67 Member Posts: 2,374
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    margret im sorry to hear your news, i second what jilly said. please rest up and take care of your self.
  • valval
    valval Member Posts: 14,911
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    stress does make it much worse so yes it will make things bad for you sorrry to read this know how hard it must be for you it will take time to get over the shock that this must have been wish could do or say something to help you but words are not enough in this casr hugs val
    val
  • [Deleted User]
    [Deleted User] Posts: 3,635
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Sending sincere condolences on the sad loss of your mum-in-law and pray that with time and healing you will reach the stage of being able to celebrate her life.

    Moderators and all the Arthritis Care team.
  • NinaKKang
    NinaKKang Member Posts: 663
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    I'm so sorry to hear about your mum passing away.

    I do think that stress makes arthritis worse. Take good care of yourself.

    Nina XX
  • caterina57
    caterina57 Member Posts: 1,424
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Sorry to hear of your loss, my condolences to you and your family.
    Grief is a strange thing and can affect us all differently
    Cath
  • livinglegend
    livinglegend Member Posts: 1,425
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    I am so sorry for your loss.

    I had to give up work as my arthritis became worse due to high levels of stress. So unfortunately, stress does increase the pain of arthritis.

    Joseph 8)
    Josephm0310.gif
  • constable
    constable Member Posts: 2,115
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi there,

    Just wanted to say sorry for your loss, it does put a big strain on you and your family. I do understand the pain you and your family are going through and I am sending my condolences to all of you.

    Karen xx
    Karen xx
  • skezier
    skezier Member Posts: 11,333
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Margaret,

    I am so sorry about your mum. Its sadly true that grief, via the upset etc, can make it worse. I really am sorry for your loss and thinking of you and your family. Cris xx
  • tkachev
    tkachev Member Posts: 8,332
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    I just want too say i am sorry you have lost your mother-in-law so suddenly and unexpectedly.
    I think stress can cause more pain and is often mentioned as a trigger factor for the start of arthritis. I personally find when I am very upset I just have to keep doing things and the pain seems less.

    Elizabeth
    Never be bullied into silence.
    Never allow yourself to be made a victim.
    Accept no ones definition of your life

    Define yourself........

    Harvey Fierstein
  • dreamdaisy
    dreamdaisy Member Posts: 31,520
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    I think that stress does worsen arthritis possible because it reduces our emotional ability to cope with it and manage it. Any form of upset or difficulty can have a knock-on effect - well I find it so with me.

    I am so sorry to hear about your mother-in-law, what a dreadful shock after such a long fight to regain health. I send my condolences to you and your husband at this very sad time. DD
    Have you got the despatches? No, I always walk like this. Eddie Braben
  • tillytop
    tillytop Member Posts: 3,460
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Margaret I am so very sorry about your lovely mum-in-law. Grief can affect you in so many ways and it would not be surprising if it made your arthritis pain worse.

    Thinking of you Margaret.

    Love Tilly xxx
  • barbara12
    barbara12 Member Posts: 21,280
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Margaret I am so very sorry that your lovely mother in law has died....grief is a terrible thing...but yet its something we all have to go through.
    I really do believe that it can make people feel more pain, and even bring on an illness.
    I do wish you well, and take time to grieve, but also take care of yourself
    Love
    Barbara xx
    Love
    Barbara
  • tjt6768
    tjt6768 Member Posts: 12,170
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Please firstly accept my apologies as I've only just seen the thread and secondly my deepest condolences too..
    From a very real and definite perspective I can say that grief can & does make things worse, possibly as Dream Daisy says, maybe it just makes us less able to cope with the pain..
    I've been in terrible pain each night in the past few days, please read the condolences for tjt6768 post by Joan Lawson for more details please, I'm extremely tired and need to try to sleep..
    Once again, I'm very sorry for your loss..

    Be well, and never forget to take care of yourself..

    Tony
    e050.gifMe-Tony
    n035.gifRa-1996 -2013 RIP...
    k040.gif
    Cleo - 1996 to 2011. RIP
  • suncatcher
    suncatcher Member Posts: 2,174
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    I am sorry to hear of your loss the upset would make you feel worse with arthritis as any stress will bring on flares. Especially grief i am so sorry for your loss sending you my condolences to you and all the family at this difficult time. take it easy hugs your way from joanne
    Joanne
  • joanlawson
    joanlawson Member Posts: 8,681
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    I'm so sorry for your loss, and I send my sincere condolences.

    I just read this on a BBC Health site:

    Bereavement is an immensely stressful event that can take a huge toll on the body.The stress response also affects the immune system. Pre-existing painful problems such as arthritis may get worse and other chronic health conditions often flare up too.
    c1b3ebebbad638aa28ad5ab6d40cfe9c.gif