what do I do now? (:

chris7 Bots Posts: 2,696
Hi to anyone passing this way.

I should consider myself lucky I still have 2 PT jobs, but now have a dilemma if anyone has any thoughts?

The shop chain where I do my one day week (Sunday) is now almost likely to be sold back to the first person who owned it! :roll: In my 8 years there, it has already had three owners with all the endless faff, re-organisation, new managers and endless retraining that entails. I am sick to death of it!
I used to do my one day there for fun, and my 3 days in a factory for the money but now both are very stressful and without this damn arther on board and the confidence issues it leaves me with, I would I think (and hope) have found the courage to look elsewhere. But I now feel stuck in both and at my wits end! :sad:

Anyway I digress, the pay at the shop has always been considerably less than the factory, (that is retail for you!) but has become increasingly left behind. We got no pay rise last year and doubt we will again this year. Under the current owner however I did get a good staff discount elsewhere which I made good use of. If the sale goes ahead, it is for me tantamount to a sizable pay cut! I quite frankly feel I can no longer afford to work there!!

So do I stick it out, out of sentiment for the books and customers I used to love helping in the hope I will again, thereby hanging onto my eggs and baskets or do I ask to increase my days at the factory which is a damn site more crippling and with an equally low morale at the moment but does at least pay better and is a thriving business just a few minutes from where I live? Feel sure they would let me do an extra day. I manage the job ok but suffer for it every evening.

I cannot afford to work less hours than my current 30 a week. Or should I stick to the three days at the factory which is really all I can physically manage and kid myself that I could maybe find another retail job for the Sunday? They seem to be always wanting weekend staff which suits me ok. Would anyone take me on with manky hips and the likelihood of months off for a THR in the future, :shock: even with my experience and customer service training almost at degree level and would the pay be any better? :???:

Oh tis all a muddle and aplogies for the work whinge when I know others don't have the luxury but can anyone make any sense of this for me?

Thanks for reading
a very confused, exhausted and fed up


  • Wonkylegs
    Wonkylegs Member Posts: 3,504
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    OH Chris no wonder you're confused and fed up, which are so much harder to cope with when we're exhausted aren't they?

    I saw the news and thought of you ..... foolishly I thought perhaps it was good news ..... but I see that perhaps it isn't. Tricky thing this life we lead isn't it?

    I can't really add much of any help but would just say what I know I must have said to you before ...... I thought that there was no way out of my work situation 10 years ago, and although it was painful at the time, decisions I made which felt wrong then have turned out to be very good decisions in the long run. The thing is we have to make a decision and then live with it, and try to avoid thinking 'what if?' so ..... whatever you do decide (and things may yet be decided FOR you rather than BY you ..... nothing's certain eh?) I wish you well.

    WOnky xxxx
  • dreamdaisy
    dreamdaisy Member Posts: 31,520
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    I don't think I can help much as I am not you, I don't have what you have and I am self-employed. What I would do though is set out a list of the pros and cons of both jobs, and make a decision based on the job with the one that has the longer list of pros. Does that help? Thought not! Sorry. DD
  • chris7
    chris7 Bots Posts: 2,696
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Thanks for the thoughts here.

    Apologies for not getting back sooner, both the naxproxen and the AD's appear to have withdrawn their services lately which is another dilemma at the moment. :shock: So wonky you may be right the decision could well be made for me sooner than I thought!!
    I hesitated to start this thread and am now wishing I hadn't. Often threads here and elsewhere when people are having to reduce hours or give up work altogether, get much sympathy but also inevitably get the widely held and often correct concensus that "your health is more important than work".

    Unfortunately for me that is not the case. However crap my jobs, they are ALL I have and I am fighting tooth and nail to keep them!! They are my ONLY reason for getting out of bed four days a week and why on some days off, and partially due to immobility I just don't bother! :???:

    I know you meant absolutely no offence DD but your comment here that you do not have what I have, has left me questioning once again my presence on the forum and is another reason I have been taking some time considering a reply here? I know this certainly wasn't your intention in any way but I am left feeling that maybe when I try to offer support to others perhaps they do wonder what right I have to be here with no surgery in view or behind me, and my TWO jobs?!! Am I somehow causing offence in this way? Your comment was a fair and truthful one and I don't think I can ever really explain how important it is for me to keep working however much I suffer for it. The alternative for me is unbearable.

    Though I have gained alot of support, information and more importantly for me companionship here, I know I have been very lucky thus far that my OA appears to have progressed slowly, or maybe it is just that there is no one here to notice one way or the other!! :???: Perhaps I simply joined the forum too soon and should stay away for a while?

    Am still no clearer on my original question though logic tells me I should if possible keep both jobs for as long as possible which would at least give me some rights re benefits when surgery can no longer be avoided. I will just have to somehow try and reduce the bills even more than usual.

    thanks again Wonky, DD and Lynn for calling in here.
    A still bemused
  • Poppyg1rl
    Poppyg1rl Member Posts: 1,245
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Chris,
    I can only speak from my experience re working with arthritis, and I'm sure it is different for everyone, the old adage that we are all different etc.
    I am a Registered Childminder and was successfully so for 15yrs, i loved my job, i was my own boss and the money was good. I had to work incredibly hard, 10 hour days 5 days a week with 4 little ones ranging from 4mths to 7 yrs. Then in March 2010 my index finger doubled in size and I felt like I had flu....got diagnosed with PA soon after.
    I struggled on till Dec of that year, my Rheumy consultant had a chat with me and as my health had deteriorated and my PA was rampantly affecting other joints she felt my job was too much, had I thought about giving up?...I was devastated, but eventually realised, she was right.
    Now Chris, I'm telling you this because the decision to end my business was incredibly hard and one that I too fought tooth and nail to put off. In the end your body and Arthur to some extent, will decide for you.
    Now, I don't, and I'm sure no one else thinks that because you have OA
    and haven't yet had surgery you shouldn't be on this forum asking for help
    and advice, youve as much right as anyone else. Don't make any
    decisions yet, I suspect you will know the right course of action to take.
    There are as you say, many weekend jobs out there, sometimes it's a bit scary to jump ship :grin: and try something new, but Chris you are experienced and hard working, something that every employer wants.
    I hope I've helped, I know for me it was one of the biggest decisions I've had to make, and one that I didn't make lightly.
    You will do the right thing for you, have faith in yourself.
    Sending love and hugs your way Xxx
  • madwestie
    madwestie Member Posts: 383
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Chris, sorry for the delay in replying to your post i don't often get as far as looking in here.
    I can agree with you on the wanting to work front, I am lucky in my case that i work from home I have OA and RA and i don't do mornings very well at least not first thing. But i do love my job i can't stand for long and walk with a crutch but i sit at a computer all day which kills my back,neck shoulders hips and hands but i would not give up my job (financially i can't afford to but i would hate to even if that wasn't the case).
    Now only you can decide when the extra days are to much and if your can still manage and put up with the pain and discomfort then that choice is for you to make.
    Yes people often say your health is better that work but that is a very individual point of view some people feel they are defined by there place in the work force and that with out that they are no-one now this is not the case but that does not stop them feeling that way. Everyones circumstances are different and no-one can tell you what is right for you.
    You could always try looking for another job while you wait to decide about your Sunday job. I am sure that there are employers out there looking for steady staff for weekends.
    As to not having a worth while point of view everyone has one of those no matter what sort of arthur they have that is the point of the forum everyone helps each other and i am sure no-one would every want to make you feel as if your opions and thoughts are not worth it.

  • chris7
    chris7 Bots Posts: 2,696
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Thank you Poppy and Tracey

    Sorry to be so long getting back to this but it was good of you both to call in. Things have been somewhat worse than usual lately at the factory and as has been said here things may well be out of my hands soon. :???:
    Must have been tough to give up the childminding Poppy, but I gather you may have a wee babe to look after for a bit, :grin: hope she is being good for you and that you are coping okish?
    Believe me Tracey, sad as it is, working really IS all I have!! My only sis and her family are a 5 hour train ride away and sadly the life long friends I thought I had melted away when I was bullied out of twenty year career I loved 9 years ago!!! Maybe that's why the crap jobs I have now are so important to me and as you say financially I have no alternative at the moment.
    Anyway thanks for the kind words.
    Hope you both are doing as okish as it gets.
    take care
    Chris xx