The ABC of life

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rondetto
rondetto Member Posts: 2,527
edited 17. Jun 2011, 12:47 in Community Chit-chat archive
The ABC's of Aging... A's for arthritis; B's the bad back, C's the chest pains, perhaps car-d-iac? D is for dental decay and decline, E is for eyesight, can't read that top line! F is for fissures and fluid retention, G is for gas which I'd rather not mention.
H is high blood pressure--I'd rather it low; I is for incisions with scars you can show. J is for joints, out of socket, won't mend, K is for knees that crack when they bend. L is for libido, what happened to sex? M is for memory, I forget what comes next.
N is neuralgia, in nerves way down low; O is for osteo, the bones that don't grow! P is for prescriptions, I have quite a few, just give me a pill and I'll be good as new! Q is for queasy, is it fatal or flu? R is for reflux, one meal turns to two.
S is for sleepless nights, counting my fears, T is for Tinnitus; there's bells in my ears! U is for urinary; big troubles with flow; V is for vertigo, that's "dizzy," you know.
W is for worry, NOW what's going 'round? X is for X ray, and what might be found. Y is another year I'm left here behind, Z is for zest that I still have-- in my mind.
I've survived all the symptoms, my body's deployed, And I am keeping twenty-six doctor s fully employed!!!

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  • NinaKKang
    NinaKKang Member Posts: 663
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    :D Very good, Ron! Not read your jokes for a while. Here's one I love:

    A female police officer arrested a drunk man and told him "you have the right to remain silent. Anything you do say will be held against you". To which the man replied "boobs"

    Nxx
  • dreamdaisy
    dreamdaisy Member Posts: 31,520
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Oh rondetto, that is wonderful, and so apt. As for you, young Nina, that was rude! (but very funny, nonetheless!)

    I have a number of very good jokes but alas . . . . . . . they are too 'rew-wood' for here. (that is my attempt at transcribing a Suffolk accent.) DD
    Have you got the despatches? No, I always walk like this. Eddie Braben
  • rondetto
    rondetto Member Posts: 2,527
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Nina!! He he, And.....anything you say will be taken down.....knickers!!


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  • NinaKKang
    NinaKKang Member Posts: 663
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Thanks DD :D The rude jokes are the best ones, everyone knows that.

    And Ron, only a problem if said female is wearing any!!

    Nxx
  • rondetto
    rondetto Member Posts: 2,527
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    :lol::lol:
  • julie47
    julie47 Member Posts: 6,041
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Brilliant rondetto
    loved the poem

    and nina loved yr joke. :lol:

    juliepf x
  • rondetto
    rondetto Member Posts: 2,527
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
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    Thanks Jules.

    xxx
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