what do I do,

lavenderlady Member Posts: 409
hi everyone normally on living with arther, but thought i might get some good advice, I was always a stay at home mum after having 5 kids 3 with ADHD and 1 with asthma with a low Iga level , so knew I could not go back yet, my youngest is 16 next month and I always planned to go back to work BUT although I'm 50 from the age of 29 have had bad back problems spondelothesis with OA in all of my joints wrist and large toe been replaced more to go, also have SMA spinal muscular atrophy, which developed slowly but now means my back and right arm left arm and hands are all very weak and at times useless, they thought it was MS but found the lower motor neurones are affected so was diagnoised with SMA, also have diabetes high bp stomach ulcers and have now just started on prozac since my mum was diagnoised with dementia, its all got too much especially with constant pain am now on tramadol and paracetamol to help cope with it all, I get DLA have done for my bad back since 95 as i have had sessions of not being able to get around, since the more health problems being diagnoised I waited to get better but eventually realised it wont I get it indefinatly, my first reaction is now becasue of mum I cannot go back to wrok but really if I am truthful I cannot imagine being well enough to work again, has anyone got any thoughts about all this obviously with DLA being shook up indefinatly may now mean not at all, I am on 29 tablets a day live in a bungalow as I could not manage steps what are your thoughts on this ??? thanks michelle


  • traluvie
    traluvie Member Posts: 2,579
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Michelle,

    I am kind of in the same predicument..I really want to work, i have worked all my life up untill 10 months ago, but i know am not well enough at the moment to be able to do so..
    I have looked at doing various jobs from home, but to find something that is beneficial and legit is hard..A*on is a good thing to do if you are able to walk round, i looked into it but am not that mobile at the moment..
    Are you able to make anything like cards, jewellery etc and sell them on..alot of people are making money from that now..
    If you come up with any another ideas let me know.. i need to find something myself..
  • lavenderlady
    lavenderlady Member Posts: 409
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    hi Tracy, I've not worked since 81 when I had my eldest although I was a registered childminder for a few years now I answer the phone for hubbys driving school etc, anything to do with my hands not got any strength and cannot cope with small things, I could offer to be Bon Jovi's roadie lol I just cannot see me coping with work every day, look after mum 2 nutty collies and 2 kids still at home, some days I am in agony and it hurts just to move, I know in my heart I cannot hold down a job, hope you come up with something you can do, as I say to my Gp I'm over the hill now he just laughs nicely, MIchelle
  • woodbon
    woodbon Member Posts: 4,969
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hello, Last year work gave me up! I have osteoarthritis, and I did try to go back to work, I managed six months by reducing the number of shifts I did to 3 seven hour shifts a week, but had to give up. I'm on ESA, as I'd paid enough NI to claim, but its being reassessed now.

    Reading your story, I think that you should'nt be even thinking of going back to work with all the health problems you've got. Don't feel guilty or worried about it. It sounds as if your GP is a nice person, have you discussed your benefits with him? My GP has given me as much help as she can.

    You need to concentrate on your family and also perhaps take to some of the care for carers organisations that are around now. I did that when I looked after my Mother-in-Law. They may help you with your mothers illness.

    The main thing is for you not to feel in any way guilty or as if lyou have to justify not working, even if the Government seems to be Hell bent on making everyone with breath left in them to get a job. I'd like to know where all these jobs are anyway!!! :roll: Hope all goes well for you. Love Suexxx
  • lavenderlady
    lavenderlady Member Posts: 409
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Sue I know deep down I cannot go back to work but feel as if I need to, if my DLA stands as it is I could maybe plan my life a bit easier but its the unknown and with mum going to be getting worse Dad with heart problems and COPD I really dont know how on earth I am going to cope if I'm having a bad time with my health problems, we've had the community psyciatric nurse round with offering help when its needed, its the emotional side of things thats going to be worse I think,
    my nan had alzhemiers so know what to expect,
    I guess I'm going to have live day by day and see what happens, I dont think the goverment know how we rely on our benefits to enable us not to return to work when we know full well we cannot do it no 2 days are alike with pain, with our limitations we know what we can and cannot do, ugh it just makes me mad, we are always struggling and just when we think we know whats happening to us bang its all shook up again more stress for us to cope with, michelle