I was visited last night by the GRIM REAPER...
sbolam
Member Posts: 374
but I fought him off with a vacum cleaner.....
Few...
Talk about Dyson With death
Few...
Talk about Dyson With death
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Comments
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ALL the best jokes are puns - love it!
Nxx0 -
wondered what this was going to say thankgoodness was not negative. made me smile thanks valval0
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You think that's bad....
Last night my wife was counting through the copper in the penny jar when she just burst into tears...
I think she's going through the change....
The other day I was at the petrol station when I started sobbing, I couldn't help it, I just started to fill up...
Me-Tony
Ra-1996 -2013 RIP...
Cleo - 1996 to 2011. RIP0 -
I walked past a gang of youths yesterday and one of them threw a piece of cheese at me, which hit me on the back of the head. I turned round and shouted, "That's not very mature!"
I used to like Russian dolls until I realised they were full of themselves!
I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down.
I used to be addicted to soap, but I'm clean now.
Never lie to an x-ray technician. They can see right through you.
Joan0 -
I just got a letter back from Screw Fix..... It says they regret to inform me they are not a Dating Agency!!!!
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you all made me smile thankyou0 -
just come out of hospital after having a neck fusion............I've never looked back!''Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy''. Benjamin Franklin (1706-1790)0
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I had curried pelican at the local Indian Restaurant last night, meat was delicious, but the bill was enormous!!Me-Tony
Ra-1996 -2013 RIP...
Cleo - 1996 to 2011. RIP0 -
In a recent survey it was found that six out of seven dwarves aren't happy!! :eek:Me-Tony
Ra-1996 -2013 RIP...
Cleo - 1996 to 2011. RIP0 -
you mad beggars.... I love umLove
Barbara0 -
My Wife said to me this morning..
"You're the laziest bugger I've ever known, pack your bags & leave"
I said "You pack em!"
LolMe-Tony
Ra-1996 -2013 RIP...
Cleo - 1996 to 2011. RIP0 -
I've just tried to buy tickets for an Elvis tribute act. Right nightmare, it was on an automated telephone system. I had to press 1 for the money...2 for the show..!Me-Tony
Ra-1996 -2013 RIP...
Cleo - 1996 to 2011. RIP0 -
Local police hunting the 'Knitting-Needle Nutter',who's stabbed six people in the ar$e in the last 48 hours, believe the attacker could be following some sort of pattern !Me-Tony
Ra-1996 -2013 RIP...
Cleo - 1996 to 2011. RIP0 -
Did you hear about the dyslexic Yorkshireman?
He was found wearing a cat flap :shock:Me-Tony
Ra-1996 -2013 RIP...
Cleo - 1996 to 2011. RIP0 -
Police have found some naked photos of Miss Piggy in Kermits garden pond. They think its frogs porn :eek: :eek:Me-Tony
Ra-1996 -2013 RIP...
Cleo - 1996 to 2011. RIP0 -
I bought a wig yesterday..I swear its made of **** hairs...as the thing kept blowing off....0
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To write with a broken pencil is pointless.
It was an emotional wedding. Even the cake was in tiers.
Once you've seen one shopping center you've seen a mall.
When the wheel was invented, it caused a revolution.
When they bought a water bed, the couple started to drift apart.
The Buddhist refused pain-killers during the root canal because he wanted to transcend dental medication.0 -
i used to work as a mime, It only now i can talk about it.
I used to make shoes for clowns..thats no small feet.
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