Crazy English

joanlawson

There is no ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple. We take English for granted, but if we explore its paradoxes, we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square, and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

Further questions to ponder:

If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught?

Why do people recite at a play, and play at a recital?

Why if a house burns up, does it burn down?

Why does night fall but never break and day break but never fall?

Why does a king rule a kingdom but a queen doesn’t rule a queendom?

Why do they call them apartments when they’re all together?

Why is phonetic not spelled phonetically?

If the plural of man is always called men, why shouldn't the plural of pan be called pen?

How do people from abroad ever get to grips with the English Language when so many words can have different meanings? eg.

The bandage was wound around the wound.
The farm was used to produce produce.
Since there was no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.
They were too close to the door to close it.

Joan

valval

very good quite a lot to get through though val

NinaKKang

My OH was born in India and lived in Germany for 7 years before we met. He can speak Punjabi, German, Italian (he worked at an Italian restaurant) but has struggled with English more than any other language - for these very reasons!

My favourite: why is abbreviation such a long word??

Nxx

constable

It's always been said that english is the hardest language to learn.

Karen xx

ichabod6

Here's one for you Joan.

If preachers preach why dont teachers teach?

NinaKKang

Um, they do teach, don't they, Ichabod?

Nxx

joanlawson

ichabod6 wrote:

Here's one for you Joan.

If preachers preach why dont teachers teach?

Well this one did, and I have the grey hairs to prove it :roll:

tonesp

Anyone here ever felt gruntled :?: :?: :?:

dreamdaisy

Oh ichabod, that made me laugh! I am a teacher and I do teach - I fill in the gaps that my much better-paid colleagues cannot be bothered to plug. I like the words that have no antonyms: one never suffers a heaval, but an upheaval is a known entity. Similarly one is never mayed.

I love our language, it is so rich and varied. Punctuation is not the key to successful communication - a good vocabulary is all that is required. The inarticulate don't lack feeling and emotion, they just cannot express it as they do not know how. That does my head in. DD

ichabod6

I like this dd.

We are reading from the same pages. Fancy filling up a philavery?
It's my current action plan on an epp course.
Maybe Joan Lawson could join us. Did you get those glamorous
grey hairs from teaching English, Ioan?

prefabkid47

.........language can make you realise how time wasting some activities can be......you cut a tree down and then cut it up!

joanlawson

ichabod6 wrote:

I like this dd.

We are reading from the same pages. Fancy filling up a philavery?
It's my current action plan on an epp course.
Maybe Joan Lawson could join us. Did you get those glamorous
grey hairs from teaching English, Ioan?

I got them from teaching the whole curriculum to primary school children for many years. I used to tell the children that every time one of them misbehaved, I would grow one more grey hair. I think some of them believed me too

joanlawson

I like these oxymorons:

open secret
seriously funny
deafening silence
almost exactly
constant variable
clearly confused
original copies
freezer burn
working holiday

Can you add to the list?

ichabod6

Hello Joan,

That certainly qualifies you for the philavery team.

joanlawson

ichabod6 wrote:

Hello Joan,

That certainly qualifies you for the philavery team.

Hello Ichabod

I wasn't sure what a philavery was, so looked it up. If I'm correct, it's 'an idiosyncratic collection of uncommon and pleasing words'.

That sounds like a good idea for an action plan :!:

Here's a good idiosyncratic word:

Neologism
The coining or use of new words e.g. in Jabberwocky by Lewis Carroll

Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe:
All mimsy were the borogoves,
And the mome raths outgrabe.

I love that poem

dreamdaisy

I regularly pandiculate. DD

ichabod6

Once upon a time I saw an atomy in a peristalith.

joanlawson

dreamdaisy wrote:

I regularly pandiculate. DD

Me too, DD, especially when I'm hebetudinous

joanlawson

ichabod6 wrote:

Once upon a time I saw an atomy in a peristalith.

Was it antediluvian :?:

joanlawson

I like these palindromes (words or phrases that read the same in both directions )

Do geese see God?

Murder for a jar of red rum.

Never odd or even.

Go hang a salami; I'm a lasagna hog!

Are we not drawn onward, we few, drawn onward to new era?