what would you do?

dee2010

hi hope all are well

i am a mum of 1 boy his now 2, i got ill during my pregnancy and found out i have RA june 2010.
my Ra is still not controlled i'm on methotrexate, plaquenil, enbrel, pred 2.5, diclofenic and pain killers as need (every day)

i want another baby but not sure if to wait or not, i was assessed y a new rhemy last month and seeing him again on the 29th sep. he said he may change my meds as they are not very effective.

so my decision is do i continue on with the new meds and wait to find a suitable one that works for no matter how long it takes then think about trying for a baby or do i give up and stop my meds for 3 months before i can conceive and just try to find one after i have had a baby.

please could you tell me what you would do to help me decide, ask any questions you feel.
sorry to ask you all but i know you are the only people that can give me a honest answer understanding my health and problems, feelings ect...

thanks

stickywicket

That's a tough call, Dee2010. There's a very recent (this page still probably) thread from stlucia on a very similar topic. The difference between you is that you already have a child so you do at least know how hard it can be.

In your case, the first thing I'd do is talk it over with the rheumatologist. That's not long to wait and, as you're so recently diagnosed, and as your arthritis is not under control despite all the meds, I think his/her input is vital.

I had 2 babies after diagnosis. It was hard after the first was born to get my RA under control again. The second was, like yours, a big decision. Though I wasn't flaring at the time it was, arthritically speaking, a rough 9 months (though, in all other respects, a very easy pregnancy). With both my boys I was very lucky to have a great husband and a supportive Mum reasonably close. Would I be without either of them? Of couse not. Would I have gone through it all with the benefit of hindsight? Probably, but then I always was stubborn.

It aint easy. I wish you well in your decision making.

valval

sorry can not give any advice but do hope you find the right answer for you some people do go into remision while pregnant val

Ankyspond

Hi,

Can't really give you much advice but I will say I think you MUST ask advice from your rheumy, you need to think how much pain you will be in and how you will cope with it.

Tough call and only you can make it, discuss it with your husband as well. Xx

barbara12

Hi dee
Sorry I cant help, but I really do wish you well , we have had a couple of people that I know of that have had great pregnancy.
I do hope someone can help with your questions, and hopefully you will stay with us, then we can support you.

skezier

Hi Dee,

That really is a hard thing to decide. I don't know what i would do I am afraid but hope you can decide what is right for you. Cris x

julie47

Hi Dee

This is a really hard question and only you can really decide and the best thing to do is talk it over with your OH and your Rhummy.

I got RA straight after having my baby. A massive shock. But then they started to get my ra under control with gold injections (this is 23 yrs ago)
and other meds. Because they got my ra under control and I was coping quite well I didn't want to give up my meds to try for another baby. I would have loved more children but It was our decision that one was enough for me.My daughter was never lonely because we always had lots of her friends in the house and garden.
Do I regret it 23 yrs later? Not at all

I really admire the people on here who have given up their meds for more children I really do. It can't have been easy.

I wish you all the best in reaching a decision
And send a big hug too ((((((())))))))))

Juliepf x

frogmorton

Hi Dee

there is another lass off meds to try for a baby...... her thread is on here too. You two could support one another.

Of course that is when you have decided whether or not now is the time to try for a sibling for your 2 year old.

Thing is.....will you be happy with one child or do you really want a second? Does OH want one too??

This is your decision isn't it? and only you can make it, but you will have to come off most of your meds now....or later.....??

Do please let us know what you decide and we will do our best to support you along the way.

Love and hugs

Toni xx

dee2010

thank you all for your support and information.
i will be specking to my rheumy next week and hopefully he can guide me in the right way.
julie yours and my RA started in the same way after having a baby which was a surpirse to me too

sticky thank you for that i know how hard it can be to look after a baby but i want that chance, my son needs a sibling in my eyes

thaks

stickywicket

Good luck, Dee2010, with whatever you decide to do.

Please keep us in the loop.