Consumer labels

joanlawson

In case you need further proof that the human race is doomed because of
stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods.

On a hairdryer:
"Do not use while sleeping".
(Darn, and that's the only time I have to dry my hair).

On a bar of Palmolive soap:
"Directions: Use like regular soap".
(And that would be how??)

On a Tiramisu dessert
(printed on bottom):
"Do not turn upside down".
(Well..., a bit late, huh)!

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
"Product will be hot after heating".
(And you thought????...)


On packaging for an iron:
"Do not iron clothes on body".
(But wouldn't this save me more time?)

On Boot's Children Cough Medicine:
"Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication".
(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we
could just get those 5 year olds with head colds off those forklifts.)


On Nytol Sleep Aid:
"Warning: May cause drowsiness".
(And...I'm taking this because???)

On a box of Christmas lights:
"For indoor or outdoor use only".
(As opposed to...what?)


On a Japanese food processor:
"Not to be used for the other use".
(Now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)


On a packet of peanuts:
"Warning: contains nuts".
(Talk about a news flash!)

On a child's Superman costume:
"Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly".

Joan

mellman01

Were like America these days, getting fater and more fecking daft, trying to engineer the idiots out of the system by stating the obvious is wrong, we should let the stupid and befuddled fickies eradicate themselves from the gene pool before were overun!.

joanlawson

"Some materials may irritate sensitive skin. Please look at the materials if you believe this may be the case.
Materials:
Covering: 100% Unknown.
Stuffing: 100% Unknown."
-- On a pillow.

"Not dishwasher safe."
-- On a remote control for a TV.

"Do not use orally after using rectally."
-- In the instructions for an electric thermometer.

"Do not attempt to stop the blade with your hand."
-- In the manual for a chainsaw.

Some assembly required.
--500 piece puzzle

Not meant as substitute for human companionship.
--Package of Fisherman's Friend throat lozenges.

Do not use for personal hygiene.
Toilet brush

julie47

Made me smile, thank you joan and del

sbolam

oh I saw the other week it was outside a pub on the way to norwich.

"all night caravan park"..and under it it said "open all day"

NinaKKang

On a packet of nuts: "Warning, contains nuts"

Nxx

cthornley

I hate the totally generic ones that end up making no sense at all

On my 3yr old sons A4 colouring book - not suitable for under 3's due to small parts ....since when has A4 sheets of paper been classified as small?
Coat for 2-4yr olds - not suitable for under 3's due to small parts

On my jacket - Dry clean only
followed by "do not use biological washing powder with this product"
:roll:

Supermarket Milk - allergy warning: contains milk

tonesp

Boil in the bag smoked haddock with a pat of butter Caution contains fish and milk products