Yes I look young but I have a blue badge because IM disabled

theresa4
theresa4 Member Posts: 696
edited 9. Dec 2011, 08:59 in Living with Arthritis archive
I know thishas been discussed to death but yet again I have been accosted by a woman in her jeep transporting I can only assume her mother/g mother. I parked in a disab;ed spot put up my BB and was getting out of the car with my daughters and granddaughter, my son getting the [pram out of the boot. (more for me to use as a zimmer than my g/daughter needs now. :lol:
This woman parekd at the back of my car adn strted mouthing at me through her window and the older woman was looking me up and down and shaking her head. I mouthed (politely) Im disabled thinking she would move on but she continued to sit there getting more irate and the looks becomming more disgusted at me from both of them I expalined again Im disabled again not enough so my daughter got my BB out and showed it to them both, instead of thzt being it tey both continued to give me dirty disgusted looks and looking me up and down shaking their heads. I know I shoouldnt let it get to me its not my fault there were no more disabled spaces but it ruined my shopping trip with all my kids. I was so close to tears and was terrified I would bump into this woman inside the centre and she would start on me. ( im not well at all so I rarely go out at the minute and this just makes me never want to go out at all) I cant do conflict right now.
Sorryjust needed to get it out it is still upsetting me

thanks for listening
Theresa
There are many things in life that will catch your eye, but only a few will catch your heart...pursue those. --Michael Nolan



Theresa xxx

Comments

  • GraceB
    GraceB Member Posts: 1,595
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Teresa,
    firstly and most importantly you have your Blue Badge because you need it and you're entitled to have it and to use it. Do not worry about what other people think.

    I'm only 46 and have had a BB since I was 39. I used to get funny looks but just glare back now or completely ignore them.

    Those of us with these BBs would much rather not need them; the fact that you have one makes your life easier. Please, please, please do not let the ignorant attitude of this individual put you off going out and about.

    What annoys me more is the amount of people using disabled bays who haven't got a BB. However, you daren't challenge them as you only get verbally abused. Unfortunately, the supermarkets don't appear to do anything to help either which is so sad.

    Keep using that Badge, display it as you're entitled to do, say "stuff you" and mentally stick two fingers up to this unkind, uncaring person.

    Hope you have a better day tomorrow.
    Take care,
    Grace.
    Turn a negative into a positive!
  • CJHunter
    CJHunter Member Posts: 1,038
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    So sorry to hear of this experience. I have a BB and am 38, the looks and comments can be horrible, but you know why you have to use it.
    Its usually the ones in jeeps n 4x4's taking granny/mum out for a shop that do it too, well that is what i have found. Just because they have a BB doesnt give them anymore of a right for them to use the space than you, even if they think they do.

    Try not to worry bout what others think, easier said than done i know, but we have enough to deal with without taking their stuff on board.

    Hope u r feeling brighter soon.xx
    Clare xxeyeore-1.jpg
  • theresa4
    theresa4 Member Posts: 696
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Thankyou Grace and Clare
    I know I shouldnt care but at the minute feel so ill, pain, tired, .....I could go on.. Its that shopping centre as well last year same date a woman in a wheelchair (self propel one) said excuse me in a clothes shop, granted it was tight room for the wheelchair at the time I couldnt wallk backwards with any ease and to get out of her way I had to so was doing so carefully and slowly. She lost patience and ran over my foot. I yelled OW it hurt !! she yelled I said excuse me, I replied yes but Im disabled and it talkes me time to move saying excuse me and then running over my foot will not stiop me saying ow it hurt. She spun her wheelchair round and aimed at me. She was screaming and swearing at me caliign me expletives. I pointed out that I had said nothing wriong and that just because she was in a wheelchair did not make her any more disabled than I and she should be more considerate. She tried to run me over. her husband stopped her. Then as I limped to the changing room with my daughter she called me pathetic. She ruined my day out and for the rest of my shopping trip youve guessed it I was worried sick. Im not very confident anymore between RA, fibro and this bowel issue I dont get out much, I cant make plans and any conflict freaks me out. Im know Im oversensitive at the minute. Christams seems to really bring out some horrible traits in some people.

    Theresa x
    There are many things in life that will catch your eye, but only a few will catch your heart...pursue those. --Michael Nolan



    Theresa xxx
  • frogmorton
    frogmorton Member Posts: 29,822
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Blimey Theresa

    you have had a horrible day today :sad:

    l wish l could come and give you a huge huge hug and wipe way the memory of it. People like that do not deserve any of your energy at all :sad:

    The wheelchair user is probably that nasty to everyone anyway and her husband likely still cringing :???: Poor bloke think of him married to a bully x:roll: .

    As for the car incident...just remember as the others have said it was your space and you have a badge because you need it and are entitled to it and the space. You could always invest in some of those car stickers which request people don't park too the car so it is obvious to nasty people.

    and finally....they are only jealous because you are still gorgeous :grin:

    Love

    Toni xx
  • SheilaD
    SheilaD Member Posts: 201
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    OMG.. Thought I'd had a bad day :roll: Bless you honey. Some people are sooooo rude and thoughtless. Here a big (((((((((((((((((())))))))))))))))
    just for you.

    Love n hugs
    SheilaD xx
  • theresa4
    theresa4 Member Posts: 696
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Thanks Shiela and Toni you made me smile :grin: I feel like such a grinch at the minute thats why Ive been awol for a while and although I managed a great birthday fro my daughters 18th Im completely shattered now its like my body actually went on hold for me to complete her party the very next day I crashed. My hubby just rang to see what was for dinner I said kids all out and have eaten so he said dont bother cooking hes taking me out nothing fancy but eat out. (locvely yes but it means I have to tidy myself up and my scalp is hurting so much there is little I can do with my hair there told you GRINCH) scuse sp pain relief not good for competency. and to think I prided myself in spelling one time. good job you all so forgivving on hrre :shock: :wink: x:-)
    Thanks all for reading and supporting me it means so much to know you are around sorry for being a misery and so needy will try to get bacck to helping some of you too

    Theresa
    There are many things in life that will catch your eye, but only a few will catch your heart...pursue those. --Michael Nolan



    Theresa xxx
  • bubbadog
    bubbadog Member Posts: 5,544
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Theresa, my dear you have every right to have your BB, if some pathetic Women decided to give me grieve the good side of me would have gone to the security man and told them I was getting Car park rage off a ageiest Women. And let the security man sort her! But the naughty part of me would have climbed out the car (someone else would have been driving I can't drive!) slowly and hobbled over to her using my walking crutches asked her what her problem was and if she carried on being abusive I would have smacked her round the knee's with my crutches and said ' now experience what we have to life with bitch!' x:-x x:shock: x:lol:
  • [Deleted User]
    [Deleted User] Posts: 0
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hello Theresa,
    I'm sorry to hear about your experiences. Unfortunately these things happen much too often. I'm 33 years old and had my BB for the last 3.5 years. I am really tired of the looks and comments I get when I park in a disabled space. But what happened to you is really horrible. I guess people should realise that you don't have to be old or ugly to have a disabled badge 8) .
    Lets ignore the plonkers. There is a reason why we have our BBs.
    Keep well,
  • dachshund
    dachshund Member Posts: 9,108
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hi Theresa.
    you need your bb you are a kind and helpfull lady the people that are rude to you are in the wrong one day they might think they let there selves down you did nothing wrong.
    you take care
    joan xx
    take care
    joan xx
  • CJHunter
    CJHunter Member Posts: 1,038
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    DONT let the B**trds grind you down hun.

    you are worth a million of them and you remind yourself of that every day.

    Take care dear lady.xx
    Clare xxeyeore-1.jpg
  • magicdragon
    magicdragon Member Posts: 75
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    I think there's very few times I can go out without ppl constantly judging me or being inconsiderate. But then you do get the odd occasion when someone is thoughtful and I try and let that carry me through instead of succumbing to the urge and wrapping my stick around their knees. :grin:

    I've said many a time to ppl you may have to bale me out, usually when someone's endangered me by there stupidity.

    My friend has a t shirt that has the blue badge logo on it that says " Im just in it for the parking" he's in a wheelchair and I think t shirts like that really make ppl think about their rotten attitudes.

    Ppl need to adjust their heads to realise that disability isn't discriminatory against age, it messes with us all young and old and the sooner ppl realise the better.

    btw 26 and a bb holder :wink:
  • Airwave!
    Airwave! Member Posts: 2,468
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Hey don't justify yourself to anyone, give them a good ignoring. People are ignorant, thats their problem, not yours.

    Keep smiling.
  • GraceB
    GraceB Member Posts: 1,595
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    My God! I suggest that none of us mess with Bubbadog - we'll all be in casualty ...
    Grace
    Turn a negative into a positive!
  • bubbadog
    bubbadog Member Posts: 5,544
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    LOL!!! Grace they don't call me pocket rocket for nothing!! But sometimes these inconsiderate people really wind me up and I wish I could wrap my sticks round there fat heads! But I bite my lip and try and exlplain to them what we say, alot of the times you can't see a disability like mine it effects my bones, and yes you can get Osteoporosis at 38yrs old! a few times they oppologise and back off, majority of the times they carry on being 'bleeps!' So I blank them and carry on with my day and they don't get the parking space! only a couple of times have I been aggressive once I smashed into the back of this rude womens legs while in my wheelchair after she said I didn't have osteoporosis, called me a liar. And once I hit this man in the knees with my sticks after he was aggressive to my husband when he blocked the garage of our old house by parking his van across it. Other than that I'm an angel! LOL!
  • theresa4
    theresa4 Member Posts: 696
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    yikes bubbadog :lol:
    Wish I could be more assertive but having a chronic illness has certainly wiped some of my spark and self esteem and it causes me stress when faced with confrontation whereas I used to be good at asserting myself.

    I suppose what upsets me is that this woman is disabled she should understand!! but I suppose her reason for a blue badge could be to do with her age and general worn down body so she couldnt possibly understand from a youngsters point of view (not that I feel young). My grandma goes mad with me shes 84 and says just cos their old doesnt mean they deserve the respect you still need to earn it. I explain Ive always been brought up like that. She says Im too nice, she has often yelled at an elderly person about their lack of manners whne they push past me reminding them that old people like them give others a bad name. She is so amazing and can walk better than me although shes started to slow down a bit now.
    There are many things in life that will catch your eye, but only a few will catch your heart...pursue those. --Michael Nolan



    Theresa xxx
  • GraceB
    GraceB Member Posts: 1,595
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    My God! again. :!: I'm definitely gonna be on my best behaviour if I meet you in person Bubbadog! Don't fancy your sticks around my OA affected joints one little bit.
    I can just picture you going in for the kill with your sticks. I do hope afterwards you gave a little smile, wished your victim "good morning/ afternoon" and then left with your head held high.
    I'm scared now - very scared!
    Grace.
    Turn a negative into a positive!