Notes for the milkman

joanlawson
joanlawson Member Posts: 8,681
edited 7. Mar 2012, 06:54 in Community Chit-chat archive
Notes For The Milkman
(back in the good old days!)

These are actual notes left for the Milkman

"Dear Milkman,
I've just had a baby, please leave another one."

"Please leave an extra pint of paralyzed milk."

"Please don't leave any more milk.
All they do is drink it."

"Sorry not to have paid your bill before,
but my wife had a baby, and I've been carrying it
around in my pocket for weeks."

"Sorry about yesterday's note.
I didn't mean one egg and a dozen pints,
but the other way 'round."

"When you leave my milk, knock on my bedroom
window and wake me because
I want you to give me a hand to turn the mattress."

"Please knock. My TV's broken down, and I missed
last night's SOPRANOS.
If you saw it, will you tell me what happened?"

"My daughter says she wants a milkshake.
Do you do it before you
deliver, or do I have to shake the bottle?"

"Please send me a form for cheap milk,
for I have a baby two months old and
did not know about it until a neighbor told me."

"Milk is needed for the baby.
Father is unable to supply it."

"From now on please leave two pints every other day and
one pint on the days in between, except Wednesdays
and Saturdays when I don't want any milk."

"My back door is open. Please put milk in 'fridge,
get money out of cup in drawer and leave change on
kitchen table, because we want to play
bingo tonight."

"Please leave no milk today. When I say today,
I mean tomorrow, for I
wrote this note yesterday...or is it today ?"

"When you come with the milk please put the coal on the boiler,
let dog out, and put newspaper inside the screen door.
P.S. Don't leave any milk."

"No milk. Please do not leave milk at No. 14 either
as he is dead until further notice."
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Comments

  • suncatcher
    suncatcher Member Posts: 2,174
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    :lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol: that made me feel better. laughter is the greatest medicine. from joanne
    Joanne
  • joanlawson
    joanlawson Member Posts: 8,681
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    I'm glad you liked them, Joanne..... they made me laugh too. Those were the days :D
    My milkman was the best help to me when my twins were tiny babies. He and his wife had one-year-old twins, so he knew lots of tips as to how to cope with two babies at once. He used to advise me while delivering the milk....far more use than any health visitor at the time :D
    c1b3ebebbad638aa28ad5ab6d40cfe9c.gif
  • Colin1
    Colin1 Member Posts: 1,769
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    well that cheerd me up joan great stuff
    colin
    WHEN GOD GIVES YOU LEMONS MAKE LEMONADE
  • valval
    valval Member Posts: 14,911
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    i must admit it did bring back a lot of memories i had forgotten they were part of the comunity and they kept an eye on the old and lonely if anything was amiss they noticed and let others know milk is cheeper now but at what cost . but we no longer have holes in the metal tops with part of the cream missing
    val
    val
  • julie47
    julie47 Member Posts: 6,041
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    :lol::lol::lol:
    thank you joan xxxx
  • stickywicket
    stickywicket Member Posts: 27,763
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Loved these, Joan. Thank you. We still have a milkman.
    If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving definitely isn't for you.
    Steven Wright
  • lorraines
    lorraines Member Posts: 77
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    :lol::lol::lol: brilliant
    Lorraine x
  • frogmorton
    frogmorton Member Posts: 29,785
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    We still have the milkman

    he only comes mon weds and fri these days and it costs a bit more, but it is very 'green' :D

    love

    Toni xx
  • georgie66
    georgie66 Member Posts: 403
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    we still have our milk man only on tues thur and sat..
    would not be with out him..
    great posting joan