The story of crispin

tjt6768

once upon a time, in a land far far away.. No, not that far, back a bit, back a bit more, stop.. Right there..
In the land of Squirrel lived a young boy named Crispin Bottlebank Nuptials Threadbare.. Or Crisp to his friends..
Crisp longed for adventure, his life was dull. He worked every day for his father at the feather weighing station. Every day was the same, bags of feathers being weighed.. Boring!

One night he decided enough was enough.. Him and his best friend Gerbil Textbooks Vintage III a three legged goat he had known since kindergarten set off on an adventure.. They didn't know each other much at all. You see, kindergarten is the name of the swimming baths they had met at four days before, but they got along very well..

Crisp had packed well for the journey... A rucksack containing
One foldable shovel
Loo roll
Pen knive
The little book of adventures with three legged goats
A packet of jammy dodgers (essential for any adventure)
A pack of pornographic playing cards stolen from his Grandad
Instant custard
Magic beans
Violin
Chopsticks
A barometer
Jeremy Vine
A photo of Raquel Welch
And a torch

Off they went, heading towards the woods of doom

More tomorrow if I can be bothered. I really should be asleep you know.

joanlawson

That's a great beginning Tony You have a brilliant imagination and I really think you should write a book for children. I've got an idea- you write the book and I'll illustrate it. Between us we might make a fortune

Pictures are already forming in my mind of Crisp weighing feathers at the feather weighing station (a marvellous idea :!: ) and then as he sets off on his journey with GTV3 ( the shortened name for his 3-legged friend )

Can't wait to find out what happens next :!:

frogmorton

joanlawson wrote:

That's a great beginning Tony You have a brilliant imagination and I really think you should write a book for children. I've got an idea- you write the book and I'll illustrate it. Between us we might make a fortune

no No No!!! Joan Not for small persons :shock: Remember the playing cards :shock:

Come on Tony


waiting for the next instalment

Love

Toni xx

joanlawson

Yes Toni, I should have said that the playing cards and the photo of Raquel Welch would have to be omitted from the story if it was to become a book for children. I don't think they'd be very keen on Jeremy Vine either, but who is :?:

mellman01

I told you he's totally mental!.

tjt6768

I'm sorry I've left you hanging folks..
It's during the wee hours that the imagination imp takes over. I think he went on a short break to Cleckheaton..
I'm sure he'll be back soon and the saga will continue.

Joan, I'm sure I could tame it down a tad for the munchkins
Kerching
Could maybe replace mr vibe with some mouthy youth/rapper that they can identify with n stuff.
Lol

bubbadog

Only Tony can tell such great stories that they have us all hanging for more! And you come back wanting more!! :shock:

tjt6768

I promise there will be more.
Someone has stolen my imaginariumational lobe :shock: I thought it was on a short break but it's been confirmed by the think police this very evening. A dastardly crime has been committed dear readers.
Be on the lookout for a stout fellow reciting crazy tales of three legged creatures and dark woods..
Last spotted in a tavern regailing locals with stories of mirth and merriment..
He has a large tattoo of an abacus on his left buttock, a missing left index finger (presumed residing in right nostril) a scar the shape of Venus Williams upon his brow and wispy hair..

Do not approach, he is thought to be armed with a poached haddock and no fear of using it :?

tjt6768

sooooooo... It's four fifteen am. What better time for a quick story update?

tjt6768

so, our heroic duo intered THE WOODS OF DOOM :shock:
Turns out to be a total misnomer, they woods were beautifully lit and decorated, very family friendly too.

Crisp & GTV3 (G for short) decided to take a short break on a bench. Whilst chatting they noticed a man dressed in black wearing sunglasses and carrying a briefcase.. Interesting thought Crisp, I shall be keeping a beady on on this fellow.
Shortly after a similarly dressed man walked up to him and said, "the harpist plays alone when the birds doth sing with glee)
Crisp & G looked at each other with excitement..
The first man, still seated looked up at the second, and said.. "concubines are usually found on the mersey, with purses in hand"
The second fellow sat down beside him. They exchanged cases and both stood up, heading off in different directions..

Did you see that G? Asked Crisp....
I think we've stumbled upon a spy bench
We must follow one of them. G rolled his eyes and muttered something under his breath.. You see, he wasn't really that bothered for adventure, he only agreed to come with Crisp to get out of the house. His Uncle Barometer Shed Buster had turned up, bringing with him his renowned slide show of his collection of bottle tops. Rumours amongst the family said that the 'show' could last five days...
Anyway, he relented. They set off following the first spy.

After a while our was apparent that he was heading to the train station..
They listened in whilst he bought his ticket to the town of Balderdash. It was four thousands miles away :shock: And left at midnight..
They asked :shock: the ticket master how much a ticket was.. 1 thousand tictacs.. Between them they had nine tictacs and some rubber bands.
How would they manage to follow him??

G suddenly started to show some enthusiasm and began tugging at Crisp's shirt tails...
There, on a column in the station,a poster......
THREE LEGGED RACE, THIS AFTERNOON.. PRIZE: TEN THOUSAND TICTACS

frogmorton

Hoorah Tony

Hoorah indeed.

Our heros will yet raise the tic-tacs to continue of their adventure

Love

Toni xxx