getting on in years

Colin1
Colin1 Member Posts: 1,769
edited 21. Jun 2012, 18:33 in Community Chit-chat archive
Perks of reaching 50 or being over 60 And heading towards 70 or beyond!

1.
Kidnappers are not very
interested in you.
2.
In a hostage situation,
you are likely to be released first.
3.
No one expects you to run --
anywhere.
4.
People call at 9 PM (or 9 A M) and ask,
'Did I wake you?
5.
People no longer view you as a
hypochondriac.
6.
There is nothing left
to learn the hard way.
7.
Things you buy now
won't wear out.
8.
You can eat
supper at 4 PM.
9...
You can live without sex
but not your glasses.
10.
You get into heated arguments
about pension plans.
11.
You no longer think of speed limits
as a challenge.
12.
You quit trying to hold
your stomach in no matter
who walks into the room.
13.
You sing along
with elevator music.
14.
Your eyes won't get
much worse.
15.
Your investment in health insurance
is finally beginning to pay off.
16.
Your joints are more accurate
meteorologists
than the national weather service.
17.
Your secrets are safe with your
friends because they can't
remember them either.
18.
Your supply of brain cells is finally
down to a manageable size.
19.
You can't remember
who sent you this list.
WHEN GOD GIVES YOU LEMONS MAKE LEMONADE

Comments

  • barbara12
    barbara12 Member Posts: 21,281
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Thanks Colin :lol::lol: dont think I would be kidnapped in the first place.. :lol:
    Love
    Barbara
  • georgie66
    georgie66 Member Posts: 403
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    this reminded me of one of my mums monologs

    sound familiar

    Just a line to say I'm living
    that i'm not among the dead
    though i'm getting more forgetful
    and mixed up in my head
    i've got use to my arthritis
    i can cope with my bi-focals
    but-ye gods-i miss my mind
    somtimes i can't remember
    when i'm standing on the stair
    if i should be going up for something
    or have just come down from there
    and before the fridge so often
    my mind is full of doubt
    now did i put some food away
    or come to take it out
    so remember i do love you
    and wish that you lived near
    and now it's time to post this
    and say good buy , my dear
    at last i stand beside the post box
    and my face-it sure is red
    instead of posting this to you
    i've opened it instead.
  • mouseymousey
    mouseymousey Member Posts: 283
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    For all that I wouldn't be 21 again for all the tea in China. :wink:
  • georgie66
    georgie66 Member Posts: 403
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    neither would i MM...
  • dreamdaisy
    dreamdaisy Member Posts: 31,520
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Thank you for the chortle Colin, and Georgie I like the monologue very much - both items beautifully sum up the ageing process! DD

    PS My dad used to like the line 'Your teeth are like stars, they come out at night.'
    Have you got the despatches? No, I always walk like this. Eddie Braben
  • Colin1
    Colin1 Member Posts: 1,769
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Georgie thats really good thanks
    Colin
    WHEN GOD GIVES YOU LEMONS MAKE LEMONADE
  • lancslass43
    lancslass43 Member Posts: 20
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Thanks for the laugh, it's cheered me up and made me realise that I'm not alone in my old age!!

    lancslass
  • gilly1957
    gilly1957 Member Posts: 212
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Thank you both for making me laugh...

    Shows what iv'e got too look forward to....54 at the mo....some of the comments already sound familiar... :lol:
  • joanlawson
    joanlawson Member Posts: 8,681
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Another perk of getting older:

    When you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to youth, think of Algebra.
    c1b3ebebbad638aa28ad5ab6d40cfe9c.gif
  • frogmorton
    frogmorton Member Posts: 30,032
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Colin

    and Georgie

    I enjoyed both of these thanks :lol:

    Love

    Toni xxx
  • tjt6768
    tjt6768 Member Posts: 12,170
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Algebra? I'm sure she's one of the teenage chavs that lives in our street :o:lol:
    joanlawson wrote:
    Another perk of getting older:

    When you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to youth, think of Algebra.
    e050.gifMe-Tony
    n035.gifRa-1996 -2013 RIP...
    k040.gif
    Cleo - 1996 to 2011. RIP
  • georgie66
    georgie66 Member Posts: 403
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    the minister called the other day and said at my age
    i should be thinking of the "hear-after."
    i told him "oh i do ,all the time "
    no mater where i am.
    in the bedroom, kitchen, sitting room, or even the garden,
    i stop and ask myself
    "now what am i here after..
  • suncatcher
    suncatcher Member Posts: 2,174
    edited 30. Nov -1, 00:00
    Oh dear i really am getting older than my years i can identify with lots on the list :shock: :o
    Joanne