total knee replacement

marrianne

Basically I am really scared ,I was trying to be healthy and happy and positive .....but a family member has destroyed me ....... I really feel so terrible now I am due to be cut open and mangled with on the 20th of july and I am so unhappy worried hurt I FEEL so unloved un supported I am being completely pathetic ................a
mostly muddle alongnd I dont seem too give back to others much its just I am shyand some times I dont really know how to join in ....................................Marrianne

JuliaHod12

Hi Marianne

I am sorry to hear you feel like this, and particularly that a family member has had such an effect on you :-( Please dont let their opinion cloud your judgement.

It is never an easy decision to have a TKR or any other major operation, and it is completely natural to feel worried.......whatever anyone else says you know in your heart this is right for you.........!

I am due to have TKR on 24th July, my family have supported my decisions as they know it is best for me in the long run and they are looking forward to the days when i can join in again!

best of luck

Julia

marrianne

Julia, thank you so much,Guess you are in a better position than I am but at atever least we can compare notes on the forum .........oh goodness brave

marrianne

Julia ,I will be out as you go in ,I think we have something to bring to lwa ........you are happy I am feeling upset does that have an afect on the out come ........Marrianne

JuliaHod12

Marianne
I think if you prepare for your Op with a positive outlook that it is the best course of action for you, then you will also be clear in your mind what you want the result to be.......improved mobility, less pain etc etc.......

If you try to stay positive and do all the right things in respect of excercises you are given and getting enough rest,then I am sure you will be fine.
And maybe you should politely ask the family member that is having a negative effect to stay away whilst you recover if they cant be happy and positive for you!

elnafinn

Hi Marrianne

I am sorry that you are in a bad place at the moment and that someone is upsetting you. I cannot really comment on that because I do not have any information to go on but I feel sorry if someone is being unnecessarily unkind.
When do you go in for your op? I have had both knees "done" two years apart and do not regret it at at all and it improved my life so much.

Everyone is nervous at going in for an op and this is a major one as my consultant was always telling me pre and post op. It is only natural to be scared - it is the unknown.

When you say that you are upset do you mean nervous or something else? You do not have to go for the op if you have changed your mind in any way. Even when you get to the hospital, you have to sign the consent form before you are taken to theatre.

Being nervous about the op will not make a difference to recovery but being positive when recuperating will go a long way to aid recovery. It is not a breeze but then we cannot expect it to be so. It takes hard work, determination, doing the physio and later working with the physio as a team.

It will help to talk about it on the LWA, it did me anyway.

I wish you well, and if we know the date we can support you before you go in and afterwards too if you would like.

Elna x

marrianne

Elna thankyou and Julia to guess you have picked up on my complete terror ........and yet Elnaevery time I try to walk any where trying to keep up up with famo away ily brave face its hopeless ......Its time I must have the operation and Julia you to brave girl its difficult to say family membrs go away ..... but well I am happy for your suths pport and Elna you are brave and strong And well guess we will both be on here in the next mths sorry typos fast and furious ...........WELL I AM SCARED

elnafinn

Aw, dear Marrianne, I was not brave and strong at all but I did know that I wanted the op(s) and was determined for it to be a success, well on my part, anyway. It was not a breeze for me and although I got good mobility quickly, I suffered pain for many months post op. It was well worth it though and I went back to have the other one done, as I said about 2 years later.

Try not to waste your energy too much on being furious. Being nervous we cannot help that but the hospital will understand. They see it all the time. Try to keep yourself busy beforehand so you are not dwelling on it all the time, before you go in. When is the op date?

Elna x

[Deleted User]

Hi Marrianne,

Have you considered calling the helplines? They are a real help with all sorts of issues, both coping with family members and having an op. They would be able to help with information on the op, post op plans and maybe help you to feel stronger as you go into surgery.

Their phone number is 0808 800 4050 weekdays, 10am - 4pm

Or you could email them helplines@arthritiscare.org.uk

Or you could post on the helplines forum

Take care
Moderator

stickywicket

I’m sorry you feel so anxious about your TKR, Marrianne. Would it help if you tried to determine what aspects worried you most? Sometimes we all reserve our deepest fears for stuff that is actually very unlikely to happen. Sometimes, for people unused to hospitals, it’s not even the op but how they will cope with the whole hospital experience. If you could tell us what’s worrying you, maybe we could help to allay those fears.

Please don’t allow one family member to ‘destroy’ you, Marrianne. They are one person among many. Don’t focus on the hurt you feel: focus instead on the many people, here and among your family and friends, who will support you and who care about you. As for ‘joining in’ – if you’ve never had the experience of your every little step being cheered on by others in your ward, prepare to enjoy it. The camaraderie of the post-op ward is so encouraging..

My TKRs have been brilliant and changed my life very much for the better. I hope yours will too.

diamond

Hello Marrianne,it is a shame you are not feeling supported by your family.It is natural to feel worried about your operation most people have a mixture of emotions from excitement that at last something is being done to fear as the op gets nearer.I had my first knee done 8 months ago,second knee 10 weeks ago i am still in recovery doing exercises to strengthen legs.Everyone recovers differently from ops so keep that in your mind but you must do post op exercises to aid your recovery.Best of luck for your op will be thinking of you.x

SteveBurns

Hey everyone, I had my TKR less than three weeks ago and have to say that at first it was very painful but now I feel so good about it that I think I will be having my other knee done when the consultant recommends it can be done.

When you go into hospital you will be with other people just like you who are in for similar surgery. Some may be TKR others may be half knee and some my be hips.

You will no doubt talk to each other about your woes but try to make light of it and have some banter. Remember that whatever the reason for your TKR that will go away as soon as you go to theatre and any pain will then be healing pain and that will ease a little every day. "However painful it is today it will be less tomorrow". That is true.

I am walking around the house on 2 sticks, and up stairs from the day after the op, but when I need to fill the kettle or make some toast I put the sticks to one side and manage without them.

Listen to the physios and OTs as they know what you should be doing, do the exercises but only until it hurts, don't give yourself too much pain.

I joined a "new knee replacement group" for physio last week and it was great. New people to meet and have a laugh with.

Please don't worry yourself too much, it soon goes over and there is life after TKR.

knuckleduster

Hello Marrianne

A friend of mine had a TKR 3 years ago and she has been absolutely fine since. I had my right hip replaced 18 months ago and, although not exactly sprinting around the park, I haven't had any problems and have felt far more comfortable in every way. You just have to listen to what the surgeon and physios tell you. All the best for your op.

Janet xx

marrianne

Thankyou to everyone who replied and good wishes to all with other issues, I am so sorry I couldnt say thankyou until now as p/c croaked for a little while and then I had to go for the o/t appointmentment and to collect elbow crutches , it really does bring it home , I also forgot to have last blood test and had to return to the hospital today ,4 buses and a 2 mile limp once again ,I realise how very difficult and miserable the knee is making me ,So still a little scared operation on the 20th but certainly reasured, now so thanks again and I will let you know how I get on ...Marrianne

JuliaHod12

not long now marianne...............we're all behind you,best of luck xxx

marrianne

Thankyou Julia, Just getting bits and pieces together,Did you know in our hospital which is all rebuilt teaching hospital they give you a small plastic bag ...... and thats it all your night clothes slipper etc has to fit in the bag ......they provide towels which will help ,but hope I to am out in the three days , I will look out for you to and wish you a good job done to .........lol did I say SLIPPER o m g ........I mean slippers of course Marrianne

lauriej

Hi, please don't be nervous about your TKR, I had mine a year ago (aged 32) and I have not looked back. It has made such a difference to my life. The initial recovery is worth the results.

marrianne

Thankyou ,Lauriej.So glad its worked for you,Just feeling so much better much more positive 1 more day to go ,thanks to you all ,Marrianne.

dachshund

Hello Marrianne.
try not too worry to much i had my tkr 9 years ago and its
still going good not a problem just try and bend it as much as you can and it will work better for you i will be thinking about you tomorrow.
joan xx

frogmorton

Hi Marrianne

I will be right there with you incase you need an advocate to get you anything from pain relief to grapes.

All will be well I am certain.

Love and hugs

Toni xx

marrianne

Joan and Toni,Thankyou very much for wishes ,to late to limp for the hills ,my bag is packed the cupboards and freezer well stocked ,and just a few last minute catch ups with friends /family .I feel ready now at the beginning of the week I was not sure, but today .yes definately get it done then the real work begins I know there is alwhttp://www.arthritiscare.org.uk/forums/posting.php?mode=reply&f=8&t=33542#ays help with the great people on here ,so I hope to be reporting back as Julia has hers done ,next week ,love and wishes to all of you .......Marrianne

marrianne

Still following Steves, blog to ,he is doing fantastically well,just a few short weeks to ,Good luck Steve catch up next week ....Marrianne

SteveBurns

Marrianne, good luck tomorrow although you shouldn't need it.

Just take everything in your stride as it happens.

Prepare yourself for the Physio and the OT who will get you up and at it as soon as they can, just remember once you are out of bed walking the recovery has started.

Please let us know how you get on. Best wishes for a speedy recovery.

Steve

elnafinn

Wishing you well for tomorrow, Marrianne. Think positive and do as you are told and you will be fine.

Elna x

stickywicket

All the best for tomorrow, marrianne. before you know it you'll be hearing those magic words "Wake up. It's all over."

diamond

Best of Luck for your op Marriane.x