Right tree huggers.. Anti hero here

tjt6768

I've decided tonight that I'm gonna become the opposite of you do gooders and tree huggers.. Maybe it's the extra fentanyl patch, who knows :?

I'm gonna do everything I can to make that hole in the ozone bigger..

Reasons...
1) planet will heat up, better summers and milder winters.. Bonus
2) sea levels will rise, making the seaside nearer to my house. double bonus
3) sea temperature will also rise, making my paddling even more enjoyable. Triple bonus
4) my game of prod the dead mammal on the beach should become more exciting. No more boring old grey seals, maybe there will be yellow fin tuna, dolphins and perhaps... A whale shark. (note to self, purchase larger prodding stick, preferably online sent via air mail from uznekhistan. Made in a shack by a five yr old slave, erm, worker.


So, tomorrow I'm going online to purchase a twenty yr old mustang muscle car from americki, also posted via air mail (keep those toxic fumes on the increase. I'll have it brought over in five separate parts of course. Firstly the body, then the wheels, one at a time and finally the air freshener, this time hoping it's made in a grotty back street in china by some six yr old named tchu yung tchu wok.. Shipped over from there to americki, then over here.. Kerching.. Eat my fumes hippies...

The day after I will purchase a bundle of fifty uber strength hair sprays from australia, this time sent via HAIR mail.. Get it, HAIR mail.. Oh never mind, no sense of humour. Must be all that tree sap that's leaked into your skulls past the dreadlocks and gelatanised your sense of humour lobes.
I'll then selotape all the tins side by side and lay them in the floor facing skyward.. And tape the nozzles down allowing all the sticky toxic nastiness to work it's way toward the great hole in the sky..


Mmm... As I type this I feel a strange lump on the side of my face
Must be my tongue that's pressing firmly against my cheek.. Lol

mig

Think you had better try and get some sleep Tony.Mig

Numptydumpty

Ha, and I thought I was being un-pc when I said noisy children got on my nerves!

valval

think the men in white jackets should come and save him from himself val

tjt6768

not enough drugs, that's my diagnosis :?

tjt6768

right, before I sleep I would like to also announce that I'll be driving my gas guzzling mustang beast over to china where I intend on shooting and feasting on some baby panda bears..
Then onward to india, I hear that tiger testicles are in season :shock:

I'm going to set up a website for like minded Blokes and for every member I'll fly out to the amazon and burn a tree down
Stick that in your hashish pipe hippy types

Wibble

creakyowl

Don't forget to eat loads and loads of cabbage and parsnips as part of the plan.

The resulting "embarrassment" should make a few more holes in the ozone layer. I'm in the global warming club too. Bring it on I say. Let arthur have the heat turned on him for a change.

Pity sprouts are out of season. they've got to be good for a degree or two.

Creaky

tjt6768

hi creaky.
I think that I'll go out tomorrow and force feed all above mentioned fart inducers to the local dairy cows, they're already great friends of the anti hippy crew..
As you're not a Bloke I shall allow you to join my website as the token girlie..
I shall burn a tree in your name
The website is
WWW.MEKTHEOZONEHOLEBIGGER.ANTIHIPPIES.ORG

fowls48

Love the idea of the mustang Don't forget to eat pleanty of broccoli and brussel spouts :shock:

tjt6768

PARRRRRRPPPP
:? :?

fowls48

tjt6768 wrote:

PARRRRRRPPPP
:? :?

More Tea Vicar

Avrielle

*Laughing so hard my tea nearly spills from my nose*

Oh dear.

You of course realise that doing this will not quite have the outcome you desire, and that it is more likely that we will be just getting drenched from rain storms and flash floods and have massive storms rather than sunny hot weather?

Plus I live on the coast.. Don't drown me! I can't run!

tjt6768

I will send you a boat with an old diesel engine. And stop trying to destroy my dreams lol

I've decided to line the walls of my eco hating house with real leopard skins.
I'm going to travel to the galapagos islands taking hundreds of carrier bags with me. I'll inflate them, tie plastic streamers to the ends and place them in the sea so the turtles will think they're jellyfish... Turtle soup anyone :shock:

Avrielle

Only if they are baby turtles! :shock:

Thanks for the boat offer. Will it be sent by air mail? Also, is the boat going to be made from wood from the rainforest?

tjt6768

yes to all of the above lol.

I've been led to believe that honey bees are in decline, also sparrows. So... It's on with the bbq, burning rain forest woods again.... All sent over by plane of course lol
I've set fire to the local tyre dump this afternoon.. Awesome smoke clouds..
Leaving all the appliances stitched on as well..
See, tree huggers, you're gonna lose the fight. Stick that in your bowl of cornmeal stew and lentil placenta :shock:

mellman01

Wasn't you driving that lovely blue and white 1968 Mustang I saw a few days ago was it mate?, bloody lovely car it was, and as for your anti-hero thingy I'll have you know I use to drive a 500MW steam powered turbine and use to burn thousands of tonnes of coal and oil a day so I've caused the sea to rise a good 2mm all by meself so do I get the chance of being your evil side kick then?.

tjt6768

I would be glad to have you as my side kick Mell..
I hope you remember the launch codes from when you worked at the nuclear plant :shock: