Frustraightion!!

alisunny

Am having the most frustraighting day.......
It really really bugs me when I can't do things I did before. There was a big delivery at work and 2 people had to ball everything off - they both looked absolutely shattered and I am so frustraighted that I can't help
It makes me feel useless and worthless and weak
Sometimes I hate RA and would wish it would disappear so I could stop feeling so bad and so guilty for not being able to do stuff

julie47

Oh dear alisunny sorry the week has got off to such a bad start for you at work
Arthritis is such a frustrating disease and at times it gets to me too even though I have had it such a long time. There are always new obstacles that get in your way but you find a way to deal with them.
You are not useless, worthless or weak you just have a condition that limits what you can do.

I am sure that you do your job very well and do everything that your body will allow. Try to think of the jobs you have done, and not the jobs you couldn't. I am sure then you will be proud of yourself

I hope the afternoon gets better for you and remember to rest when you get home.

Take care
Juliepf x

LignumVitae

It gets to us all sometimes, the limitation of disease. I was going mad at times last week struggling with three dogs alone. Two I can manage but three is much harder and I had to ask for help- never fun. Thing is, there's plenty you can do better than other people, you just never see those things like you see the stuff you can't do. I always get to look after the students and newbies at work because I tend to have more patience than my colleagues. Patience is something my arthritis really helped me develop. It was a colleague who was a bit jealous that my boss always sent the fresh people my way who pointed out that he did so and why he did that. I'd missed it, probably cos I was too busy feeling annoyed I don't get to travel to meet clients like others do (boss also realises the physical problems that can cause me) and I bet there's things like that for you too.
I hope you feel more settled soon, you aren't alone in that moment of grrrrrrrrrrr :x but don't forget how great you are and how much more you are than the tasks at work you didn't complete.
Big hugs, LV xx

stickywicket

I do understand the frustration. I still feel it sometimes after years of RA. You feel you're not pulling your weight. You worry that others feel you're not pulling your weight. I'm afraid that's the nature of the disease. We all have to cultivate thick skins and know that, when we're doing our best, there's no more we can do. Try to use the yardstick of effort put into things rather than visible outcome. It does help to know that others might have more to show for what they've done but you have actually worked harder for the lesser amount you have to show for it. You are holding down a job. In my book that means you're doing very well.

alisunny

Thanks guys
Just needed a rant!
I have had a better few days.
The people at my work are so good with helping and knowing but it is still that fear that I am not 'pulling' my weight and feeling guilty about not doing things.
It is about getting your mind around that and thinking about it differently, I get stuck with that a lot!!
Acceptance I think is what it is! And I cannot get my head around that part of the condition!
Maybe it just takes time
Ali x

babytiger

I do understant the frustration of not being able to do things you could beforehand but as others have said think of the things you can manage and the support you give your coleaugues.

barbara12

Hi alisunny
Please try and not be too hard on yourself, but I really do understand how you are feeling...here's some hugs to keep you going ((((((())))) xx