Feeling so down

Lolabilly

Feeling really down today I think it's hit me that my life is going to change so much. I'm in so much pain with my hip today I think that's adding to my gloomy mood. I just feel like my life is on hold unt I can have my thr I'm so glad school I'd breaking up for the holidays on Friday so I'm not gritting my teeth on the school run feel like a rubbish mother and wife because I'm grumpy and exhausted from the pain sorry for the moan I know it could be so much worse but at 23 I never knew post traumatic arthritis would happen to me

wall1409

bless you hun. Arthritic pain is unbearable, we've all been there so dont apologise for being low. Your not a rubbish mother and wife, you have looked after everyone not its their turn to help you and dont be afraid to ask, took a while and a few tears before my family realised how this was affecting me. Chin up hun, you'll get through this and you have the lovely people on this site for plenty of support

Wendy xx

Lolabilly

wall1409 wrote:

bless you hun. Arthritic pain is unbearable, we've all been there so dont apologise for being low. Your not a rubbish mother and wife, you have looked after everyone not its their turn to help you and dont be afraid to ask, took a while and a few tears before my family realised how this was affecting me. Chin up hun, you'll get through this and you have the lovely people on this site for plenty of support

Wendy xx

Thank you Wendy, I've been lying to everyone for so long about the pain I've been in so finally admitting to my husband that I'm in pain and then the doctors telling me it's bad news for me it finally seems very real to me denial is a wonderful thing haha! Just overtired and emotion about everything! We have had a terrible week what with my diagnosis and my dear fil dying

GraceB

Lola,
Firstly I know what it's like to be in pain all the time. All the forum members know that - just keep posting and you'll get the moral support that you need.
Please talk to your husband and family. Tell them how bad it is. I also think if you've not already done so, you should urgently see your GP and get some proper pain control sorted out. However, please don't let him/ her fob you off with paracetamol or something similar - you need proper pain control. Once you have some meds sorted, make sure you take them when you're meant to - if you skip a dose you'll know about it unfortunately! You need to get control of that pain - at the moment it's trying to control you.
In the meantime, here's my prescription (now others reading this post will think - oh no not again!). Take one large bar of chocolate and consume it in one go, washing it down with a glass/mug of your favourite drink. In addition, have a lovely relaxing hot bath/shower. If able to bathe, pour in as many expensive bubbles as you can get away with and take a second cup/glass of your favourite drink with you and a good book. Shut the door and let everyone else in the world get on with things whilst you soak and have your 'me' time. If showering have it as hot as you like, and be under it for as long as you want to be - ignore the banging on the door or the steam clouds that will then be very visible!
I'm sorry to hear about your sad loss.
Take one day at a time, break tasks down into manageable chunks. If you can sit down to do something, do so.
Take care of yourself and keep posting.
GraceB

Lolabilly

GraceB wrote:

Lola,
Firstly I know what it's like to be in pain all the time. All the forum members know that - just keep posting and you'll get the moral support that you need.
Please talk to your husband and family. Tell them how bad it is. I also think if you've not already done so, you should urgently see your GP and get some proper pain control sorted out. However, please don't let him/ her fob you off with paracetamol or something similar - you need proper pain control. Once you have some meds sorted, make sure you take them when you're meant to - if you skip a dose you'll know about it unfortunately! You need to get control of that pain - at the moment it's trying to control you.
In the meantime, here's my prescription (now others reading this post will think - oh no not again!). Take one large bar of chocolate and consume it in one go, washing it down with a glass/mug of your favourite drink. In addition, have a lovely relaxing hot bath/shower. If able to bathe, pour in as many expensive bubbles as you can get away with and take a second cup/glass of your favourite drink with you and a good book. Shut the door and let everyone else in the world get on with things whilst you soak and have your 'me' time. If showering have it as hot as you like, and be under it for as long as you want to be - ignore the banging on the door or the steam clouds that will then be very visible!
I'm sorry to hear about your sad loss.
Take one day at a time, break tasks down into manageable chunks. If you can sit down to do something, do so.
Take care of yourself and keep posting.
GraceB

Thank you for your lovely reply! I'm on co codamol at the moment it just takes the edge off but not alot else! I'm exhausted today so looking forward to a hot bath and a mug of hot choc this evening! I'm just sat on the sofa with a pillow shoved under my bum having a good cry at the moment! Going to try and get a docs appointment tomorrow to beg for some better pain relief! I'm sure I wouldn't feel as down if I wasn't hurting so much thank you for all being so nice to me xxx

dreamdaisy

Arthritis worsens in time of stress because a) it's fuelled by stress or because b) we can't cope as well with it on top of everything else that life throws at us. You have a great deal on your plate at the moment, so coddle yourself as much as you can when you can, it's the only way. DD

Lolabilly

dreamdaisy wrote:

Arthritis worsens in time of stress because a) it's fuelled by stress or because b) we can't cope as well with it on top of everything else that life throws at us. You have a great deal on your plate at the moment, so coddle yourself as much as you can when you can, it's the only way. DD

Thank you dd feeling a tad better now my both my little ones are home they keep me busy just trying to figure out what I'm going todo long term really thank you for your kind words they are really helping me

villier

Awe Lola sorry you are feeling rubbish sending some ((((()))))s to keep you going for a wee while, you know you can come on here any time and let it all out, there is always someone about to listen, all you can do pet is take each day as it comes and get as much support as you can and keep asking questions albeit on here your GP, consultant get as much info as you can get, go and have that nice long soak as Grace suggested get some you time, hope your feeling a wee bit better..............tc..............Marie xx

kentishlady

Hi Lola. Am sorry to hear you are having such a bad time and know exactly what you are going through with the pain - we all do - so don't worry about coming on here and having moan if you are feeling a bit down. Hope you can get some meds sorted out. Unfortunately, I get the most horrendous side effects from the 'stronger' painkillers my GP has tried me with and can only take Paracetamol with codeine as an additional separate 'back-up'. I try not to take the maximum daily dose of codeine but am finding that I need to take more than I really want to.

Am not sure that it helps an awful lot but suppose it takes the edge off, though most of the time it doesn't feel as though it does!!!

Am sorry to hear of your bereavement too, you really are having a difficult time. Do take care of yourself and take things as slowly and gently as you can. I know how you feel about being 'grumpy'. I feel like that too but as I am on my own I tend to bottle up my feelings and just get very frustrated and annoyed with myself that I can't do what I want to do and/or if I do, I then pay for it afterwards with the pain level going sky-high! Have been having a day like that today.

Take care of yourself and remember that we are all here to support one another as and when needed.

Beryl ((()))

frogmella

I am sorry that you are going through such a tough time. I echo what the others have said - we all understand what you are going through.

That shock of your life changing so abruptly is awful so feel free to moan at us on here. The act of typing it all out helps to get your head around it sometimes.

I think GraceB had some good advice. It does help to spoil yourself with a bath, a book and a glass/cup. I have used reading to batter my pain away. I know it hasn't really gone but I get so far in my book that it seems further away somehow.

The loss of your FIL will also be making everything harder for you and so your pain will be/seem worse. I am sorry for your loss.

Sending some gentle (((()))

Take care of yourself

Helen
x

Lolabilly

Thank you all so much for the hugs and kind words and most inportantly the understanding of how I'm feeling and what's going on in my head! No one else really can understand why I'm in a state and on the verge of tears at the moment my lovely hubby came home with a big bar of galaxy choc and ran me a hot bath he's my rock even though he's dealing with grief aswell although in the end his dad didn't know who we were it still is a shock I really appreciate the support and I'm so glad I've found this forum

Lola

frogmella

Sounds like you have a good 'un there lola. These little gestures make all the difference.

((()))

Lolabilly

Thank you (((((())))) feeling more positive today been doing lots of research and I'm going to the docs to talk more didn't sleep very well but nevermind

Lola

Nicchick

Hi!

The pain relief thing is so important, my lovely GP struggled with managing mine and the communication between the hospital and surgery was rubbish and both the rheumy nurses and she told me I was depressed - I kept telling them that I have a lovely life, I changed my job to something I can do with RA(or PsA, if they ever decide!) BRILLIANT family, boyfriend etc. I was just in too much bloody pain to enjoy it all!

As soon as I was prescribed better anti-inflammatories and stronger painkillers I stopped sobbing every time I spoke to a health care professional! I told GP to never underestimate the effect that having *some* of the pain taken away can have! That left my mind free to deal with sorting out lots of other stuff like DLA, Blue Badge and finances.

Write stuff down, everyone on here says that! I just handed a list to my new consultant and he read through it and said 'we need to get this sorted' - I am a little bit in love with him for making an effort and taking an interest in my condition, the old one didn't!

Take good care and just like the others have said on here, I'm sorry to hear about your loss. A difficult time.

Nx

Lolabilly

Nicchick wrote:

Hi!

The pain relief thing is so important, my lovely GP struggled with managing mine and the communication between the hospital and surgery was rubbish and both the rheumy nurses and she told me I was depressed - I kept telling them that I have a lovely life, I changed my job to something I can do with RA(or PsA, if they ever decide!) BRILLIANT family, boyfriend etc. I was just in too much bloody pain to enjoy it all!

As soon as I was prescribed better anti-inflammatories and stronger painkillers I stopped sobbing every time I spoke to a health care professional! I told GP to never underestimate the effect that having *some* of the pain taken away can have! That left my mind free to deal with sorting out lots of other stuff like DLA, Blue Badge and finances.

Write stuff down, everyone on here says that! I just handed a list to my new consultant and he read through it and said 'we need to get this sorted' - I am a little bit in love with him for making an effort and taking an interest in my condition, the old one didn't!

Take good care and just like the others have said on here, I'm sorry to hear about your loss. A difficult time.

Nx

I've got a few things to write down to tell the doc especially the pain I mentioned in the last post! I'm ok today getting used to the idea of thr on the horizon and I just want to deal with things head on now I've been taking my angry out on carpets today cleaning all thr stains my kids have left haha! I'm happy I've found a good consultant he seems really up to date on things and helping! Just waiting for the letters to come through! The orthopaedic nurses also seemed lovely so I
Going to do my very best to be positive thank you for the kind words and advice I really appreciate it