Feeling 'disabled'

lynnhb

My whippet x Labrador (my husband insists he is a Dingo) has a wonderful nature & is extremely loving; however walking with him is difficult. When we got him (my idea) I was ready to walk walk walk. Then my knees got worse until I couldn't do that. We live near the sea so the beach in winter is ideal as is the common in summer. But I had no time to train him before I got bad so he is a 'puller' & I lost my confidence. On the beach it would be great if I could let him off lead. He chases other dogs though & I can't move far or fast enough to get him back. I feel so embarrassed as dog walking and making sure my dogs behaved were always my way of life.
I had a dog walker for a while, but at a cost. My husband walks the dog now & I feel awful because I only work part time & my husband works full time plus does the shopping, cooking & dog walking. I do other tasks but not as much as I want to do.
For the first time in the 6 or 7 years since I got bad I really felt 'disabled' recently when a colleague said he was meeting another colleague on the beach as they walk their dogs together & let them run. I could have cried. I love my dog so much I felt he is missing out. So am I!
I have to keep telling myself that because he is such a nervous dog it is good we took him in & give him a good home because a lot of people might have given up on him in the early stages when he wrecked things.
Oooh! It makes me so mad that I can't do it. I tell myself I can & try then the pain hits. It's easy to say 'work through the pain - that is not always possible. :oops:

frogmella

Hi,

I am sorry that you are feeling so bad at the moment. I have dogs too and one of mine is a devil for pulling - I am not entirely joking when I say that I think she caused my back problems. We spent a fortune on dog training for her - she even went on a residential course!

Have you tried all the "gadgets"? Like the head collars or the harnesses? We found that she wouldn't tolerate the head collar but the harness worked quite well.

We are lucky in that neither of ours will chase other dogs, although the puller is a bit too enthusiastic with people and sometimes I struggle to stop her running up to all the people where we walk - not helped by the two ladies who treat her for doing it!!

Is there a dog socialisation class that you could go to where maybe he could be desensitised to other dogs? Or do you think your colleague's dogs could be used to desensitise him? Is he chasing to play or fight? I know that my boy dog will tell other dogs off sometimes and it looks much worse than it is.

I have read a lot of dog books too so that I could understand their behaviour a bit better. I found the dog whisperer by Jan Fennell useful.

I know how awful you must feel. It is rotten not being able to walk your dog. I hope I haven't just written a load of things that you have already tried. I hope that a solution will reveal itself.

Good luck

Helen

Helenbothknees

lynn, I feel for you as I was a keen walker (though without the dog) before I got osteoarthritis in my knees. I hope I am also not about to tell you what you know, but have you seen your doctor? Do you have enough and strong enough painkillers? I spent ages soldiering along without any, saying I hated taking things, but in the relatively early stages they can make all the difference between feeling like you can do what you want even if your knees hurt, and feeling 'disabled'. If it's OA that you have - and I'm guessing -there are other things too, like steroid injections, which work for some people.

If that won't work, well, I'm a cat person really, but I know enough about dogs to know that they are generally just happy being with the person/people they love. You took him in, and I'm sure he's grateful for that. He doesn't think he's missing out, so long as he has his person around. Maybe as far as that goes you need to learn to think like a dog who is easily satisfied, not a human being who always wants more. That's in no way meant as a criticism.

I hope someone else posts something more useful for you.

barbara12

Hello Lynn
I went through this and still do but not quite has bad now, I walked for miles and love to take my little dog with me...I really do understand how you feel, its awful watching others knowing you cant do it.
I dont have my dog now...but I know a while ago there was a thread on dog walking I will see if I can find it for you..you will get there...but in a slightly different way...(((())) xx

constable

I once had a dog like yours. He was a wonderful, protective, loving dog. I had him from 6 years old and he had never been lead trained. And hated(with a vengeance)other dogs. In fact the 2nd day I had him, he pulled me over and I broke my ankle. Whilst I was recovering my family had him. And he pulled my dad over, and....guess what. Broke his ankle. But I kept him, I loved him. He wore a mussel most times. I would walk him at strange times so as not to meet other dogs. I contacted the RSPCA and they told me as lonf as I had a garden and occasional walks and plenty of love, he would be ok. He was 16 years when we lost him.

I would love to have another dog, but I know I could not walk him.
Just let your hubby keep walking him, dont feel bad, it's not your fault.

suzygirl

Have you thought about a scooter or a powered wheelchair? Then you could be out and about and walk the dog, admittedly not on the beach!

I would also speak to the doc about stronger painkillers. Maybe you could ask a neighbour or friend to help you walk the dog in exchange for something else?

I understand the dilemma, but the dog is loved and has a good home which is excellent, so stop beating yourself up about things you can't control. You could sit in a chair and throw the ball, that is good exercise for him.

I hope you get it sorted.

kentishlady

Hello Lyn. I know exactly how you feel and really do sympathise with you over this. Since I retired, I should really love to have a dog for company. We had a Golden Retriever for many years and I still miss him so much, but as I would now be unable to walk him (OA in back and knee). As I am on my own I don't have anyone else readily available to do so for me. I know you say your husband walks your dog and that you feel guilty about not being able to do so, but what about cutting down on the amount of walks your dog has which would lessen things a little for your husband. As others have said, your dog has a good home and is much loved, and I'm sure he won't miss having slightly fewer walks.

I agree that trying to ignore the pain doesn't always work and it makes me so cross that I am unable to do want I want to do.

Take care. I hope you feel a little brighter soon.

Beryl ((()))

charleeh

Hi,

I can't take my poor dog for a walk any more. We used to walk miles and miles. I make sure I take her up the garden every day to fill up the wild bird feeders now.

We sit in the garden as soon as the weather permits but there's nothing like the freedom of going for a walk with the dog.

I will say I used a halty for my dog, she only pulled a couple of times and figured out she wasn't going anywhere and the just walked by my side letting it go slack. She got the message in the end (about 6 months!) and I went back to her other lead.

I hope you feel better soon.

Best wishes
Charleeh

lynnhb

Hi everyone. Thank you so much for all your kind and caring replies. I am so pleased to know others have had similar problems. I really couldn't part with my dog. Just to answer the question about chasing other dogs; he is not at all a fighter, he just loves to play. He doesn't seem to have an ounce of malice in him, bless him. He was a rescue dog & has a dreadful fear of trains - the sound & the vibration near them. Otherwise he is happy happy happy as Shrek would say!
Love & hugs to all of you. What lovely people use this website. Cheers me up & I feel less isolated. xxxx

lynnhb

For all you dog/animal lovers; have a look at this clip:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FS8n6WdP9qw

frogmella

You know what, if he isn't chasing them to fight, just to play, then I wouldn't worry too much. Mind you, where I walk it is all nice dog people. I suppose I have walked in places where the dogs/owners are less friendly. In my experience the dogs will sort things out between themselves. One of mine isn't too keen on some dogs and he gives a warning growl if they get too near- it usually works! If it doesn't he tells them a bit more firmly and then they go away! No bloodshed so far. He also avoids the other dogs - he walks in a big loop around them.

Don't feel isolated - we are all here to support each other. (())