Motherhood..........

spottidotti
spottidotti Member Posts: 11
edited 4. May 2013, 05:24 in Living with Arthritis archive
Hi there

Not been here for a long time but having a difficult time at the moment and wondered if anyone else was going through the same thing.

I had a baby boy January 2012 who is my world.

I have RA and have found the last year or so quite challenging.
I've had a lot of help and support from my husband who has been amazing but i didn't realize just how much it would effect me mentally and physically.

I've not been able to go out with him myself at all since he was born.

I can't carry him the down the stairs, the stairs being a struggle when its just me!

I find it too hard to carry him when out or push the pram for more than 10-15 minutes.

This has been hard to deal with, especially on nice days when i just would of loved to go to the park with him.

Its the loss of independence and the total reliance on someone else to give me a hand that has been so hard to deal with.

I've been feeling really down lately.

I think motherhood is hard for anyone but when you have an illness its twice as hard.

Myself and hubby don't have any other family members at all to help us out so its literally just been the two of us trying to manage everything. Its been so hard on other half too spending all his time looking after me and the little one when he's not at work.

I don't know how we've done it actually!

When my little one starts walking i know things will improve as we can navigate the stairs together and he can walk with me outside so i'm sooooo looking forward to those days!!!

In general its really exhausting just getting through the day and were as before i could have a lie down when my knees were hurting now i have to chase round and carry an 11kg baby all day!

If there are any other mothers out there with RA i'd love to hear from you and how you cope with day to day life.....

Chow for now

Dotti x

Comments

  • suzu1982
    suzu1982 Member Posts: 21
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    hi dotti
    i really feel for you hun, i have ra too and my husband and i are trying for a baby and the things you are going through are the things that are worrying me.
    the loss of your independence is a terrible feeling but you have to know that you are not alone.
    i hope things get better for you and someone is always here to talk.
    *hugs*
    S*
    where there's life, there's hope
  • MrOptimist
    MrOptimist Member Posts: 175
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    Hello Dotti, if you google 'Home Start' it will give you details of a Charity which helps families in your situation. It might be worth taking a look :).
    I do empathise with your situation and wish you the very best for the future :).
  • stickywicket
    stickywicket Member Posts: 27,764
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    Babies are no easy option even without arthritis. With it, things can get really tough. (I did it twice :roll: )

    You do seem to be having things very bad indeed though if you are unable to get out of the house with the baby. I certainly couldn't have carried mine but I used to find the pushchair a useful walking aid :lol: Is your RA under control right now? Perhaps you should see your rheumatologist again. Or, maybe an Occupational Therapist could help with some adaptions?

    I know we do have other Mums with young children but, understandably, they're not on here much. Perhaps a chat with our helplines might help.
    If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving definitely isn't for you.
    Steven Wright
  • spottidotti
    spottidotti Member Posts: 11
    edited 30. Nov -0001, 00:00
    Thanks everyone for your replies and suggestions.

    I'm just having a sneaky cup of tea whilst little one is with his dad!

    I'm hanging in there, everything is just so much harder than i expected it to be.
    RA is pretty much under control but i'm still struggling. Its such a hard condition to live with.

    Anyway thanks again for your kind words

    Dotti x

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